


It's a Deal

by justreadingfics



Series: It's a Deal Universe [1]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alpine the Cat, Angst, Blow Job, Casual Sex, Drunk Reader, F/M, Fingering, Fluff, Oral Sex, Smut, fingering in a room with other people, fuck buddies, fuck buddies to maybe lovers, future smut, overdrinking, the mandalorian reference, toyboy!bucky
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-16
Updated: 2020-11-08
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:15:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 77,701
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23164600
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justreadingfics/pseuds/justreadingfics
Summary: You’re out of a relationship of 10 years and you’re just in desperate need to get laid, no strings attached, no romance, no complications. Your dear friend Natasha feels like she’s going to regret this later, but she might have the perfect guy to fulfill your needs.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Reader
Series: It's a Deal Universe [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2069613
Comments: 307
Kudos: 472





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> I was going to write something for Looking for a Heartbeat universe, but this idea came up and I was so excited. This is me trying my hand at romantic comedy. It’ll be very smutty but there’ll be angst eventually because it’s me. This version of Bucky is different from everything I’ve written before, but I think this is one of the beauties of this character. He’s so nuanced and layered, there’s always a new version of him to be explored. I hope you guys like it and stick with me. I’m planning 10 chapters, but the number may change. Feedback is highly appreciated.

When Natasha bursts into his apartment - like she’s done many many times before- holding up a big cup of coffee, the first thing that hits her is the smell lingering in the air, making her whole face scrunch up. The whole apartment stinks of a fucking orgy and she doesn’t even get to act surprised or outraged. This is what it’s been like. Ever since Bucky started to get better, changing from the brooding shadow that had first arrived to regaining his self-confidence, he’s been spending it and his whole package of super soldier stamina like that. A new night a new girl. Or two… she realizes when she spots the pair of different underwear over his couch as she makes her way to his bedroom. Three? She shoots an eyebrow high at the sight of a third one hanging around the doorknob.

She would die before touching the damn thing and, because she’s also always up for a little show, she decides to use one of her signature moves to make herself into his bedroom. A powerful kick to the door is enough to have the effect she wanted : three different tones of high-pitched screams and a low groan fills the room. 

Natasha doesn’t need to say anything. Just her steady, impassive demeanor while still in her Black Widow uniform from the last mission is enough to make the trio of naked bodies move. They shoot themselves out of the bed and scramble to pick up pieces of clothes from the floor.

“Ugh, sorry, sweethearts.” Bucky’s voice is groggy with sleep and muffled by the pillow, “Thanks for last night, though, it was amazing.” He raises his thumb up but remains lying on his stomach, his very naked behind exposed, completely unphased by Natasha’s presence.

The girls rush past her without even daring to glance at the Avenger. Well, except for the owner of the underwear on the doorknob, who gives her much more than a glance in the shape of a shameless once over and a lustful wink before grabbing the piece of lacey and fleeing, putting it on along with her dress on her way.

With an exaggerated yawn, Bucky catches Natasha’s attention again and she steps into his room as he rolls over and sits on the mattress. At least he has the decency to pull a sheet to cover his front before he stretches his arm to the air letting out a second yawn, “What is it this time?” This is definitely not the first time a scenario like that has taken place, to Natasha’s exasperation.

“Crowded around here, huh?” Walking over to him with a judging brow up, she hands him the coffee, which he promptly accepts, “Do you even know their names?”

“Sofia, Olivia, and Amanda,” he answers simply before taking a sip from the coffee, “The one checking you out was Amanda, she’s nice, I think you’d like her, and you’ve seen them before here, just not the three of them together.” He smirks, raising a feigned innocent gaze from his cup to her.

Natasha chooses to ignore the answer in favor of letting a huff out, “We - and by we I mean Fury - missed you at the debriefing.” She glances around, trying to find a place she could sit without accidently making contact with any kind of… fluids. Spotting the armchair nearby, she shoots a questioning look at Bucky.

He presses his lips in a guilty fine line and shrugs, “I think you’re safe standing up.”

“You’re gross, you know that right?” She grimaces, crossing her arms in front of her. “How the hell did this happen, anyway? We got here around one am from the mission.”

He shakes his head dismissively, “You know I have my ways and I needed to shake the stress off. Too much energy to spend.” 

“I can see that,” She laughs, “I mean…Three?

“You were there. It was a hard mission.” The corner of Bucky’s eyes crinkle as he grins back at her.

“That it was,” she agrees, letting some air out in a puff, “And that’s why I’m here now. You weren’t picking your goddamn phone and Fury wants to debrief with you before he signs the reports.”

“Ugh,” Bucky rolls his eyes, blowing some steam out of his cup of coffee, “that guy… what a huge pain in the ass, right?”

Natasha catches the playful tone and shakes her head, holding back the smile, “You won’t make me bad talk him, you know that.”

She can’t keep the smile suppressed any longer when he lets his head fall back and laughs. Carefree and contagious. It took him a while to get there, but now? Laughters, giggles, and jokes are a part of who Bucky Barnes is. For that, she’s thankful. 

“Alright, just give me a minute,” he concedes, bringing his coffee back to his lips.

Watching him, her face turns a bit more serious. “How long will you keep this up, huh?” she asks, bringing her hands to her hips. 

With the back of his hand, he wipes a bit of coffee that slips from the corner of his mouth “What?” His forehead crinkles as his attention is focused on cleaning himself.

“This lifestyle of yours…” Natasha waves a hand around the room and over himself, “Don’t you ever want to… I don’t know… settle down for one woman or something like that?”

The confused expression that shifts Bucky’s face as he looks back at her is almost comical. “Why in the world would I do that?” He puts the cup of coffee on the nightstand, before standing up, wrapping the sheet around his waist. “This is so much fun, no strings attached… just good old exchange of fluids, enjoying one another’s bodies… and the next morning we’re off with our lives.” Ignoring the disapproval look on Natasha, he grins down at her, before passing by her to walk towards his closet.

“I know this might be a good deal for you, but what about the women you bring down here, is this fair with them?” Natasha insists.

“Ok, now listen,” Bucky turns back to her, pulling an underwear from the drawer, “All the girls I hook up with want the exact same thing I want, “ He leans down to put on the underwear under the sheet covering his lower half, before letting the white fabric pull down on the floor. “They’re here for the sex just as much as I am.” He turns back to the closet, fumbling with his clothes.

“Aren’t you going to take a shower?”

“Fury needs me asap.” He deadpans, before continuing while putting on his jeans, “Not once I took advantage of anyone, I guarantee you that. I´m not fooling them, they’re not fooling me. It’s a fair deal. Perfect to be honest, pleasant, I mean very pleasant to both sides…” He smirks before raising his gaze filled with mischief from where he’s buckling his belt to her, “You damn well know how good it- I can be…”

Her eyes roll at his smirk and she crosses her arms in front of her again. “That ship has sailed, Barnes.” It was just one time months ago and she knows she will never hear the end of it.

“Just saying…” Bucky shrugs, tying his hair back into a low bun, keeping the half smile on his lips, “Whenever you need to shake the stress off again, you can always count on me.” He winks.

“Yeah, right, go take a fucking shower and then we can talk.” Natasha grabs a pillow from his bed and throws at him. “Ok, I get it, I’m not an expert here and probably not the right person to be telling you this, but don’t you feel like you’re missing things? Or maybe that you’re hiding from something?” she suggests, walking past his bed to come closer to him.

“Nat, I swear… I’m not hiding from anything, there’s no hidden feelings or fears or anything like that… It’s just sex.” He states, sounding a bit more thoughtful with his friend’s worries , putting on a white t-shirt as she’s now just a few steps away from him. “People usually make a big deal about it, but that’s it. Sex is just sex. It’s fun and a fucking amazing experience to share with someone. And that’s it. Me and the women I spend time with are very sure about that. No worry.” As he finishes dressing himself up, he places both hands on Natasha’s shoulders.

She aims a deadly glare at where he touches her, “I honestly can’t decide if you’re a pig or a genius, but right now take your unwashed hands off of me.”

Bucky laughs, squeezing and shaking her shoulders halfheartedly, “I took a shower before I went to sleep, calm your damn titties.” He removes his hands anyway before placing a kiss on top of her head, gaining a hiss in exchange, “And a genius, of course.”

“All right,” Natasha says after glancing at her watch, “Nine. I still need a shower myself and at least a nap before Y/N drops by for lunch. You go see Fury now.” She commands, tapping his shoulder and already moving past him to the door.

“Oh, Y/n? From the tech department?” The peak of interest on his voice behind her doesn’t go unnoticed by Natasha, “It’s been a while since I last saw her, how’s she? Still with that boyfriend of hers? What’s his name again?”

“Eddie. And no, they’ve broken up actually,” she answers, already opening the door to leave his apartment, “But don’t even think about it,” She warns, already sensing the smirk on his lips without even looking back at him, “She would never take one of your deals.” Natasha shuts the door before he could say anything else.

~~~

“Fuckbucket! Bumhole, son of motherfucker arseclowns! Goddamit nutsack!” The line of curses being spat out of your mouth is followed by you grabbing the bottle of tabasco and dropping almost half of its content over the plate of linguine in front of you.

Natasha says nothing, chewing her own pasta slowly as she stares you down, wondering how that combination of words could be the one to come up to your head when you wanted to swear. The small bistro is crowded and a few heads turn in your direction following your little – and kinda cute, if she’s going to be honest- outburst.

“Sorry…” Glancing around you seem to notice the brief but unwanted attention as your voice shrinks and your shoulders drop. “I asked for it fucking spicy, though,” you add in a mumble, only stressing the new curse, bringing a fork of linguine inside your mouth. You sigh, seeming finally pleased with the level of spice in it.

“Ok…” Nat drags the word as her eyes drop at the glass of wine in front of you. The second one already, “Bad day, I assume?”

A guttural and frustrated groan slips out of you as you swallow your food and take a long sip from the wine, “I’m just… ugh, everything sucks these days.” You place back the glass on the table a little more forcefully than it should be expected, your eyes following the move of your hand.

“Something at work?” Nat asks, “Do I need to talk to Tony?” She tilts her head, a hint of exasperation on her words.

“No, no. Of course not.” You wave a dismissive hand, “That lunatic is the best boss I could ever have asked for.” A quick but honest smile forms in your lips. 

“Alright…” Natasha accepts, “Eddie, then?” She tries again.

“No… sort of. I don’t know.” You sigh, now playing with the food in your plate as your jaw tightens.

“Talk…” Natasha orders, putting down her fork beside her plate and brushing her hands together, swallowing the food in her mouth. “Have you been seeing him at work? It’s been a while since I last saw him in the Tower.” She leans her head on her joined hands as she rests her elbows over the table, giving you her full attention.

“He’s been promoted to a leadership position at SHIELD’s tech department, that’s why you haven’t seen him.” You respond, still playing with your food, “I haven’t seen him either, not ever since we broke up, but I guess splitting up is doing wonders for him.” You bite your cheek.

“How long has it been already, three months?”

“Yeah.” You nod.

“You miss him.” Natasha affirms rather than asks, a sweet comprehensive tone on her words as she crosses her forearms over the table, leaning forward. You two haven’t had the time to properly talk about your breakup, given Nat’s mission schedules and your own job, which can be a pain in the ass when it comes to work-hours.

“Of course, I do,” you say, looking up to the ceiling and shaking your head before moving your gaze to her again, “It’s like… I never saw it coming. Almost ten years of relationship… when he said he needed to talk I thought he was going to propose.” You scoff, covering your face with both hands in pure disbelief in yourself, “But instead he said he wanted a new path for his life. What the hell does that mean?” You raise your voice along with your arms to each side of you. 

“I hate to say this, dear.” Natasha grabs her glass of water and takes a sip before resuming, “But you know I’m not one to sugarcoat the truth and it probably means he’s fucking someone else…sorry.” She shrugs, knowing she could be sounding a little harsh, but she’s aware sometimes harshness is the right medicine. 

“Well, at least someone is getting fucked,” you mutter under your breath, while rolling the pasta in your fork to shove it your mouth.

The slipped comment sets off Natasha curiosity instantly and she just eyes you for a second before urging, “Well, elaborate.”

“Ugh… Jesus.” You grunt before taking in a deep breath, “You know, I do miss him in my life, but God… what has been killing me right now is,” you lean forward, getting closer to Nat as she mimics you, “I’m so fucking horny.” You whisper as Natasha’s eyes grow round at your admission. You had never said anything like that to her before, you two are close friends but you’re always so reserved about your private life, “It’s been almost a year.”

“A year?” She whispers loudly, but lowers her voice as you quickly shush her, mortified someone would hear you two, “But…”

“Yeah, I know the break up was three months ago, but it doesn’t mean I was getting any before that,” you admit, frustration seeping into your voice. 

“Oh, honey…” Natasha tilts her head, trying to convey empathy towards you rather than judgement.

“I know, right?” You smile sadly, leaning backwards in your chair, “How was I even surprised when things went south? I don’t even know what happened, to be honest. We just… stopped.” You shrug a shoulder, grabbing your fork to play with it absentmindedly, staring down at it, “And I was ok with it. At least I think I was,” You look back at Nat, who’s just listening to you attentively, “I guess I thought at least I had everything else. I don’t know…” You shake your head in a sign of disapproval of yourself, “But after we broke up?” Once again you lean over to whisper, “That’s all I think about. Almost everyone I see ends up in a fantasy of mine. Things I never even dreamed about wanting… I eat a fucking strawberry and suddenly I’m turned on.” Your desperation is visible in your big, round eyes and audible in your rapid speech.

“Why don’t you go out, meet someone, then?” Natasha tries to hold back her laugh out of respect for you. 

“Ugh,” you wave her off, glancing to the side with a grimace, “Too much work. Besides, I don’t think I’m ready for anything else.” You shake your head, “I just want to fuck.” You add in a grunt, shaking your legs in a very bratty way.

“Oh, wow,” Nat leans back to her seat, “I never saw this coming.”

“Can I tell you something?” You say, after studying Nat. When she nods and leans closer to you again, you continue, keeping your voice low, “Eddie was the only one I ever been with.”

Natasha chokes on nothing and quickly grabs her cup of water, gulping in down to the last drop, “How the hell did this happen?” she yelps.

“Well, back in highschool I wasn’t really ready, and then in college I met Eddie.” You shrug, curling your lips down, “We’ve been together ever since. But after he broke up with me, that was one of the first things on my mind, the thought repeating itself like a parrot in my head. That I had never been with another man.”

“Hell, sis,” Nat exhales, “I’m starting to understand your situation now.”

“Ugh, Nat, seriously, I just need someone to fuck me senseless.” You tighten your teeth and make a grabbing gesture with your hands, “Just some primal, animalistic sex, I need someone, anyone who can take me properly. No strings attached…Nothing else, I’m tired of everything else.” You shut your eyes, shaking your head, before looking around you. Satisfied no one is staring or listening, you once again bends closer to Nat across the table, “Even thought about hiring a goddamn escort, but I just bought the condo with Eddie, and, until we figure this out, I’m broke as fuck.” 

Nat’s jaw drops. She’s speechless, utterly speechless. As you look back at her, a bit of shame but also expectancy gleaming in your eyes, a thought pops into Natasha’s mind. The universe must be playing with her, and that’s what she finally says to you. “Holy shit, the universe must be putting on a fucking joke on me.”

“Why?” You squint at her, “What do you mean?”

Natasha doesn’t answer right away. She ponders the thought for a moment. It might not be a bad idea, actually. Shaking some steam off, having a different and lighter experience with someone else, a little bit of fun… that might be exactly what you’re needing, and who could be more perfect for that? At least he’s someone Natasha trusts. She sure hopes so. “Are you serious about all of that? You’re really just looking for sex and nothing else?” Natasha checks. 

“Dead serious.” It’s your straight up answer. 

“Ok,” She decides, nodding once, “I may regret this sooner than I think but I might have the perfect guy for you.” 

~~~~~~~~~~~


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first encounter.

“Bucky Barnes?” you squeal after the air got caught in your throat, “You mean The Bucky Barnes?” Leaning forward and lowering your voice, you check if you’ve heard correctly, “Are you out of your freaking mind?”

“You’ve talked to him before, right?” Natasha frowns as if she’s trying to collect the information from her memory.

“Yeah, I mean, I usually see him at the Tower when I go see you and in almost all of Tony’s parties and all. He talked with Eddie and I once, he seemed pretty interested in our work with technology,” you say, remembering the occasion and all the enthusiastic questions he had made, right before disappearing from the party with a beautiful brunette on his arm. It had caught your attention how the super soldier seemed such a tech geek, but that’s the closest interaction you had with him. 

“I don’t think your extensive knowledge was his only interest, though.” The smile twisting Nat’s lips can only be described as cheeky.

You side eye her, identifying her suggestions but not quite buying it. She must be going bananas to suggest Bucky Barnes could be the guy to help you with your… situation. You barely know the guy outside sharing the same space a few occasions and what you’ve heard of his public figure. Not to mention that, the times you’d seen him on social events he always had a couple of women on his neck. 

“He’s an attractive man, you can’t deny that.” Natasha declares , rolling some pasta on her fork.

“Are you kidding me?” you scoff, “He’s hot as fuck, you can hear the sound of pants dropping when he passes by our department, he just loses to Thor- you should see what happens there when people just hear he’s around.” Your eyes go bigger for a second, making Nat chuckle, “Yeah, Bucky Barnes is fucking hot and that’s why he’s way out of my league.”

“Hmm,” Nat tightens her lips and grabs her glass of water as she leans back on her seat, “That’s not what I heard in his voice when he asked about you this morning.” She peeks at you from under her eyelashes as she drinks from her water.

“What?”

“Well.” She grabs the knapping to pat it over her lips, “I said I was having lunch with you and he asked if you were still dating Eddie… in a very not he’s out of your league way.” She mockingly mimics your voice before smirking at you. 

You can feel the rush of heat creeping up from your chest to your neck, but you shake your hand, dismissing the suggestion on her comment, “I’m sure that means nothing and besides, no matter how horny I am, I’m not ready to get romantically involved with anyone else right now, that’s not I want.”

A loud and nearly hysterical laugh bursts out of Natasha’s lips. Placing both her hands on her belly her head falls back. Not finding what you could have said that was so funny you just lift a brown, staring at her.

“Honey,” she says when she finally stops laughing, keeping a huge smile on her lips, “You’re safe with him, I swear.” She raises a hand in a promising gesture, “Romancing you is the last thing on his mind. And if it’s not what you want either, if you’re looking for a no strings attached thing, Bucky will be more than happy to be your boytoy.”

The heat which started on your chest rushes to your cheeks when you let out an embarrassed giggle at her word choice, “Jesus, Nat…”

“That’s the truth,” she assures, “Let me put it this way,” Nat adds, leaning closer and gesturing for you to do the same, “If it’s a good fuck you’re in need of, he’s quite… let’s say…” she purses her lips , searching for the word, “Suitable… for the mission.” She bites her lower lip and winks. “I can guarantee you that.”

Your jaw drops at the confession, “Shut up.” A guttural tone comes out in your voice. 

There’s nothing but smugness on her demeanor as she leans back, “A few months ago, he and I needed a distraction after a mission…” She shrugs, “Listen, don’t ever tell him I said that but the guy knows what he’s doing. That sinful tongue of his? Ugh, should be illegal…the best goddamn orgasm I’ve ever had in my life. And he was never weird or anything about it later, I gotta give him that.”

You can’t believe you don’t see a single trace of pink on Nat’s face as she tells you all of that…and you? You have no dignity. No self-control, anymore. You sure hope Nat doesn’t notice as you can’t help but brushing your thighs together. You were a lost cause when she mentioned the illegality of his tongue. That was a particularly hard no of Eddie and so help you God if you’re not turned on as hell right now by just thinking of the possibilities. You’re not blind or stupid. Bucky Barnes would be a dream guy to have in your bed, and if Nat says he might be interested and is on the same page as you are… 

“How could we arrange that?” Your voice comes out a little too breathless.

Nat lets out a knowing chuckle, “Leave it to me.”

~~~

When Natasha asked where you wanted to first meet him you mentioned one of your favorite restaurants. You figured a public and neutral place would be fitting in case you decided to flee out of the situation for any given reason. After all, it would be your first encounter with another man other than Eddie after ten years and you thought going slow and gentle with yourself would be the right move.

That’s what you thought…

Now, having the guy in front of you across the table, his attention apparently focused on the menu on his hands looking like a goddamn God of sex… a public place is the last place you wanted to be.

You’re not sure if he notices you staring from above your menu as his eyes casually roam through his, but you don’t even care. You had seen him up close before and you always knew how hot he was, but now… with the prospect of what may happen tonight, it seems like all your senses are enhanced when it comes to him. 

He had arrived a bit later than the scheduled time but you let that one go once you got glimpses of a disconcerting wide smile adorned by the five o’clock shadow on his face, which seemed especially designed to make women – and men- swoon. He’s wearing dark jeans and a blue t-shirt and you wonder how he can make the simple outfit so damn sexy. His fairly long hair is tied back in a low bun and you had to hold back the impulse to pull it back and grab a handful of his locks.

When he shook your hand you swallowed back a whine at the feel of his strength, wondering how it would be the feeling of his broad arms around you… by the tiniest of smirks on his lips maybe you’re not sure whether you succeeded in disguising that one.

He’s been a gentleman so far. Making conversation – with the sexiest voice you’ve ever heard- in such a natural and spontaneous way. You’re not sure what Natasha had told him beforehand exactly, but not for a minute he’s made you feel embarrassed by any chance and the scratch inside you only grew… desperate for his touch. 

“Hmmm,” The sound coming out of his lips purrs into your ears and it hits straight to your core as he keeps his eyes on the menu. You sulk in a breath, “So many delicious treats…Can’t figure out what I want…” He slowly lifts his gaze to meet yours and you don’t know if it’s your horniness speaking but all you see there is a mischievous dark shade, “What do you want?” He darts his tongue out to wet his lips and that’s it.

“I want to get the hell out of here.” The honest answer comes out without giving you the chance to even think about it.

His eyes grow even darker and he immediately shuts the menu, dropping it on the table, “Your place or mine?”

~~~

The very moment you step into your living room, the boldness which had started to mold your attitude seems to lessen. You’re still horny as ever and still wish nothing but to be completely ruined by him, but the fact that you just brought him to the condo you bought with Eddie – the place where you had planned to live the rest of your life with him - starts to weigh on your shoulders. Besides you’ve never been intimate with anyone else, you don’t even know where to start, what to do or say.

Gulping down the anxiety, you hold the door opened for him and he walks inside. The uber ride to your place had been just like the little time you spent together at the restaurant. Small talk, him being respectful and nice and that’s it. He still feels like a complete stranger to you, which he really is, and you’re not sure how to feel about it yet.

“Uh, do you want something to drink?” you ask passing by him towards the center table to drop your purse, trying not to show your nervousness into your voice, “A glass of wine, maybe?”

Your breath hitches as the heat of his body hovers your back, “Is that what you really want now?” His warm breath tickles your ear and goosebumps rush over your skin. 

“Ahm, D-did Natasha tell you about-” The rest of what you were about to say is swallowed by a sigh when you register the touch of his both hands on your hips. A light and simple touch and you can feel yourself already turning into jelly.

“She told me the situation, yeah.” Like he’s testing the waters, he circles his flesh arm around you, pulling you closer to his broad chest when you offer no resistance, “I wouldn’t be here otherwise.” Nuzzling into the crook of your neck he breathes in your scent.

Your head falls backwards into him and your legs shake. You’re incredibly turned on right now, just by the touch and proximity of him, you’re absolutely sure you won’t survive the night. 

“Are you nervous?” he asks gently.

“A-A bit yeah.” Your breathing accelerates as his lips graze upon your pulsing point and his hand plays with the fabric of your loose skirt right over your lower belly. 

“Do you want me to stop?”

“No,” you answer a little too quickly and a little too loudly, “No…” you repeat yourself, making sure to sound a bit more confident as you place a hand over his and drag it down to the end of your skirt above your thigh. “I don’t want you to stop, Bucky,” you whisper, as you slide his hand under the fabric, bunching it on your way while you guide him to where you’re aching for whatever this night will bring.

Accepting your lead and your assurance, he hooks his hand under the lace of your underwear, coaxing out a gasp out of you as his touch eases between your folds, “Goddammit,” he breathes, softly moving his finger back and forth, “You’re wet already, beautiful. Is it all for me? Damn,” he curses under his breath, “You’re turning me fucking on.”

You answer him with a wanton moan as your eyes flutter shut, letting yourself drown in the expert movements between your legs.

“Try to not overthink anything… I know what you want…” As his finger teases over your clit, he whispers in your ear, “I want it, too.” When he kisses your neck down to your shoulder, you’re thankful for the metal grip on your waist or else you’ll be putty on the floor.

“Shit…” You bite your lip and while one of your hands reach behind to the nape of his neck, the other grabs the pulse of his hand which is leisurely playing with your pussy. Not to stop him, but to find some extra support to keep yourself up.

His chuckle reverberates through the skin of your neck, “Right now here’s what we’re going to do.” He drags his lips to your ear again, “I’m gonna make you cum, sweetheart.” Bucky shows his intention by sliding a finger inside you, holding you tightly when your knees buckle, “I’m gonna take the edge off and make you come on my fingers and then we see what comes next for us tonight.” He pulls you to him, pressing your ass to his hardness, “We don’t need to worry or plan anything… we’ll just let it happen, ok? Can you feel how much I want you tonight, sweetheart? Do you want me, too? Do you want me to make you come?” He punctuates every line by dragging his lips over your skin.

His words make you dizzy with a powerful and overwhelming desire burning you up from inside out… you let yourself sink into the pleasure building up inside your body and your answer is to circle your hips against him, in pace with the move of his finger inside you while his thumb plays with your clit.

“Hmm, that’s right… say it, sweetie, I wanna hear you…” He presses his thumb a little harder against your clit.

“Yes, fuck yes.” you cry, between hard breaths, “I want you to make me come… I want it so bad, please…”

He responds to your plea by quickening his strokes. The disappointment when he removes his middle finger from inside quickly vanishes when he focuses on your clit, working on the sensitive nub with the sole mission to make you come. Your core tightens and tightens and you’re a moaning mess in his hold, his hot breath on your neck making you lightheaded. You’re not gonna last long, and you’re torn between the desperate need to come and trying to focus and hold yourself back because it feels so goddamn good you don’t want it to end just yet. The heat of his body crowds you, making the whole world spin around you. As you moan and breathe out your pleasure, his hold and touch ruling your mind and body, the squelching sounds coming from the move of his fingers on your impossibly wet pussy invades your senses. 

“Fuck…listen to you, you’re so damn sexy.” He sucks on your pulsing point before brushing his soft tongue over the tender spot, “Come, sweetie, let go… I wanna feel you soaking my fingers even more.”

It all becomes delightfully too much, and a few more expert circles on your clit joined to the sensation of his teeth grasping your earlobe drive you to the edge. Like a puppet on his strings, you come. You’re not quiet when it happens and your whole body shakes with the shocks of pleasure, your thighs shutting on their own will around his hand. Once again he catches you when your body goes limp against his, whispering praising words to your ear. It’s a head to toe orgasm and it’s heaven inside your body. You realize you needed this even more than you knew…

But you need more and you want much more.

As soon as you feel the strength coming back to your legs, you tap his hand off of your underwear and turn around capturing his mouth in a searing kiss. You’ve been thinking about kissing those beautiful lips ever since you first laid your eyes on him that night and he doesn’t disappoint by kissing you back right away just as fiercely, while his hands roam through your body and his tongue seeks yours.

He starts walking you backwards and you take a hand off his neck to point the direction to your bedroom, to where he follows. He groans when you capture his lower lips between your teeth and grabs a handful of your ass. Dying to wrap your legs around him, you jump and he promptly catches you from under your thighs. It’s hard to think about parting your lips from his alluring ones and you don’t stop kissing him until you’re inside your bedroom and he parts from you, throwing you on your bed.

You yelp at the leap, which is far from delicate, and prop yourself on your elbows, watching as he takes off his shirt and tosses it to the side. It’s already a struggle to breathe but your situation worsens when you see his exposed abs and shoulders and arms and fucking muscular chest… You silently thank the heavens for your friendship with Natasha Romanoff. You can’t help but notice the scars by the metal arm, but he doesn’t seem worry in the slightest by having them exposed and fuck you if the attitude doesn’t turn you on even more.

He doesn’t wait long before jumping back on you. Having your skirt bunched up your hips you gladly welcome him between your legs kissing him with the same force from before and wrapping your arms around his broad shoulders. He groans when his tongue brushes against yours and you sigh through his lips as he starts rocking his hips against yours. Even through the fabric of his jeans and the lace of your underwear the touch brings sparks to your core as you feel the evident bulge grinding against you.

The cold of his metal hand hikes under the hem of your top, making the little hairs in your body rise on his way. You part from his lips just to pull up your top and throw it aside. You’re not sure how it happens but in a bat of an eye he reaches behind you and with an expert pull, he unfastens your bra. The piece of underwear is all of a sudden out of you, baring your chest for him.

You gasp in awe for his skills and he smirks, “I really needed to see those titties,” he smiles. When his eyes drop to your chest, he inhales sharply, “Fucking gorgeous.”

You’re sure you had something to say back to him, but the room soon fills up only with sounds of your hard breathing as he wraps his warm mouth around a breast sucking on it harshly. While his tongue curls around your nipple his metal hand gives your other breast some attention, massaging it with the perfect amount of roughness.

Your hips buck into his hips, seeking more friction, to release you from the coiling ache in your core. You do what you’ve been wanting to do all night, pulling the tie from his hair and grabbing a handful of his locks as he ravishes your chest.

After taking his time on your breasts, having his fill of sucking, nibbling and grabbing them, he drags his lips up your neck till it stops on your ear, “What do you want? I’ll do whatever you want…” He offers. 

You’re still quite a bit distracted by the rock of his hips against yours to fully register what he’s so sultry whispering in your ear, grazing your hands down the burly muscles on his back. He feels so big, so strong in your arms…

“Tell me, sweetheart, tell me what you want.” he purrs into your ear.

When he offers again, his sinful tongue doing wonders on your neck, a thought sweeps into your mind… By experience, you know men don’t enjoy that very much, but Bucky seems willing to please and odds are you won’t see him again after tonight… Yeah, why the hell not… “I-I want you to-to eat me out.” It blurts out of your lips before any kind of self-consciousness strikes your resolve.

The grinding of his hips halts and you’re already bracing yourself to see his disgusted expression when he moves his lips away from your jaw and leans back to stare down at you. But what you see instead makes your stomach flip in the most delicious way. His blue eyes are impossibly dark and his tongue darts out to lick his lips, like he’s about to eat a delicious treat.

After placing his lips on yours briefly, he makes his descent, showering your chest and stomach with warm and wet opened mouth kisses. Your heart beats fast when an up till now unknown sensation invades your chest, making it tingle with excitement and anticipation. He brushes his nose over the lace of the underwear you’ve specially bought for the occasion, right above your mound. Your breath catches in your throat when he places a long and chaste kiss upon it.

He didn’t really seem to care about your brand new underwear as he’s quick to drag it down. You raise your legs to help him out before he tosses it aside, keeping his eyes on your exposed pussy as he gets down from the bed. You gasp when he pulls your legs bringing you close to edge of the mattress as he sinks on his knees on the floor, hooded eyes on your spread pussy right before his face. This is definitely the most exposed you’ve ever been to a man – your boyfriend of ten years included- and it turns you on even more than it should. 

You’re aware of how wet you are, and the smell of your arousal is strong enough to fill your own nostrils… You should be embarrassed, you know you should and definitely thought you would be, to be in a situation like that with a man you barely know, but that’s definitely not the case as enticing, aching sparks twirl inside you.

As you fist the sheets on each side of you, the time seems to freeze as you long for what’s to come. He, on the other hand, doesn’t seem worried about time, as he ghosts his fingers on both your inner thighs. The light touches- one cold the other warm- makes you shudder and… ticklish. You bite back a laugh but it doesn’t slip from his attention.

“Tickles, sweetheart?” He chuckles against the soft skin of our inner thigh, causing his voice to reverberate through your skin, not to mention the light scratch of his stubble and you just can’t hold back anymore.

You cover your mouth with both hands as the giggles slip out unbidden. It seems to amuse him while he keeps sliding his fingers and his lips over the little spots, a sweet torment that makes you laugh harder and squirm your legs. 

“Plea- Oh, fuck.” Your voice – and the giggles- die in a gasp and your back arches as he engulfs your whole pussy with his mouth with no warning.

The warm sensation is new and overwhelming and your first reflex is to try and pull away from it but he’s faster, wrapping his arms around your thighs, holding you still to his face. He delves his tongue in caressing your most sensitive parts and it feels soft and wet and silky. It tingles and you struggle to breathe as he meticulously swirls his tongue all over your pussy, spreading your juices around you and himself.

“Holy motherfucker,” you cry out and your eyes flutter shut and you once again arch your body because an intense and new pleasure covers every fiber of your pussy and rushes up your spine. Your fists twist the sheets harder as he swiftly laps at you.

“Hummm,” the vibration makes your whole body tremble before Bucky tilts his head to nibble softly at your inner tigh, “You taste fucking amazing,” he adds, placing your legs over his shoulders.

The praise alone is enough to make you clench around nothing and if you thought it was good so far, after he dives in again it’s with a renewed hunger. He sucks and nibbles and properly fucks you with his tongue and lips, keeping you securely attached to his hold. You’re a mess. Your whole body reacts to the sensations, and you’re loud as you moan and gasp and he keeps your hips steady to his hold.

He swirls his tongue around your clit and you’re there. You’re almost there… your head sinks into the mattress and you dig your fingers into your hair, your ribs moving fast unashamedly grinding on his face at the rhythm of your breathing and you’re fucking there-

“What the-?” you groan, propping yourself on your elbows to look down. You see Bucky staring up at you, your arousal glistening on his jaw as he puts on a malicious smirk.

You’re about to protest about the lack of action but your mouth shuts when he sucks his fingers and brings them to tease your entrance before inserting them at once. The sudden intrusion makes your head fall back as you shout out a moan. You prop your feet – or rather your heels which you still have on- on the mattress, letting your knees up as he curls his fingers inside, as if looking for something.

“Oh, shit,” you curse between harsh breaths when he finds the spot he’s been looking for. The sheet bunches in your fists and your head snaps up at him.

He keeps lustful blue eyes on you as he fucks you harshly and fast with his hand, making sure to brush his fingers right on the spot that makes you scream. Your moans fill up the room, mixing up with the squelching sounds of his hand in your pussy. Your eyes shut when it’s there again, that tight knot twisting your insides, the desperate need of release, to soak his hand once again.

“Oh, shit, I’m gonna cum- No!” you shout when he pulls back his hand. You shoot a look that you’re sure is nothing but pitiful at him, but he doesn’t deprive you for long as his lips are on your pussy again, humming at your taste once more.

His skilled tongue goes back on doing wonders coaxing shocks of pleasure in your core, his face deep into your pussy moving up and down, side to side. You can’t take your eyes off of him as he grabs one of your thighs with his metal hand and you grind your hips against his face, trying so desperately to hush your release.

But he’s in the mood to torture you. A sweet and maddening torment as he brings you to the edge and stops, alternating from fucking you with his fingers and then his tongue. At some point, when you’re already surrendered to his power, with his tongue flickering over your throbbing clit, he brings his flesh hand down his body. Since he’s kneeling by the edge of the bed, you have no vision of it, but you listen to the sound of him unbuckling his belt. His tongue doesn’t stop as he brings his finger to your cunt, coating it in your juices before bringing his hand down again. 

Your skin burns and all the air isn’t enough to fill up your lungs as you realize by the movements of his arm that he’s touching himself. He’s getting himself off while eating your pussy and you’re sure you’ve never seen or felt anything so hot in your whole life. You just wish you could get a glimpse of his cock.

With everything he’s doing to you and the fact you’ve been on the edge for a while, the addition of the thought of his cock in his hand is more than you can take and this time it comes unannounced. Incoherent sounds you never knew you were able to produce slip out of you as strong spirals of pleasure burst from your pussy, rushing up your spine and down your legs, curling your toes and turning you into a trembling loud mess, completely at mercy of the buzzing ecstasy invading all of your senses. 

“Holy fuck!” Your body jerks up with aftershocks of your climax but he’s not having it and keeps you steady to his hold, licking up your sensitive pussy and rushing up his hand on him, “Oh, shit, oh fuck, shit, shit, shit.” Your mind blacks out and you scream unashamedly and your body collapses to the mattress as he drives you to yet another powerful orgasm with his tongue.

From your blurry vision, you spot his arm jerking even faster and he rests his head on your thigh. With eyes closed and biting his sinful lips- coated in your pleasure- he grunts his own release.

You both stay like that for awhile. You sprawled on your bed relishing in your own little paradise while he rests against your thigh, both trying to calm down your breathing. You’re completely spent, the pant up energy in you being drained by the three outstanding orgasms he had given you that night.

You feel your eyes fluttering, fighting against sleep, and in a blur, you see Bucky getting up and moving around, you don’t fully register what he’s doing but you know he gets in and out of the bathroom a few times, seems to clean the floor with toilet paper and fumbles with his clothes. You roll your numb and contented body to the side, seeking a comfort position to enjoy the full state of bliss you’re in.

“Are you alright?” He gets closer to you, bending over the side of your bed he reaches to cup your cheek and hands you a glass of water. You hadn’t even seen when he went to the kitchen. “Did you have fun?”

A lazy but fulfilled smile spreads in your face as you incline yourself just enough to drink from the water, gulping it down to the last drop, “Oh, yeah…I’m fabulous.” Your heavy eyes drop to his jeans to see it fully clothed and his jeans zipped up. You realize you’re incredibly satisfied and didn’t even get to see his cock or actually do anything per se, “Ahm, do you want to-”

“Shhh, don’t worry…I had an amazing time, tonight,” His voice is gentle and soft, grinning back at you. 

To be honest, you’re kinda relieved by his answer. You’re so damn relaxed right now you’re not sure you would have the energy to do anything else, no matter how enticing the thought sounds. 

“Do you need anything else?” he asks, taking the empty glass from your hand. 

You shake your head, still smiling at him. 

“Alright, sweetheart…I’m gonna go then. You rest now and whenever you need me, will you call me?”

“Fuck yeah.” You breathe out, collapsing on the bed again, trying to keep your eyes opened.

He chuckles at your quick answer, “It’s a deal?” He leans over your earlobe and bites softly on it, making you shrug and let out a small giggle.

“It’s a deal.” you murmur back, nodding slowly before dozing off with the lazy smile still on your face. 

~~~


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You did make a deal.

Saturday mornings have always been like any other morning to you. Waking up early, making some black coffee and fixing up something quick to eat . Then checking up on your schedule for the day, which more times than you dare to count consisted of working from home and that’s it. Nothing special. 

But this Saturday morning is nothing like the other ones, this morning has actually already passed since you wake up past noon, a lot later than you’re used to, take a long bath with all the pampering accessories you found in your bathroom - something you hadn’t done in a very long time- plaster your face with a moisturizing mask you’ve bought on a late night online shopping spree and has never used, wrap your body in a robe, your hair in a towel and go to the kitchen to make your usual black coffee but also a few chocolate pancakes as a treat to the atypical hunger making your stomach groan loudly.

ThisSaturday is nothing like the other ones because you have the memory, on your mind and your whole body, of three fantastic orgasms you were gifted with the night before. If it was up to you, Bucky Barnes and his sinful tongue would get all the awards in the world.

While you hum a soft tune and flip your pancakes, the night before replays like a movie on your mind, taking small giggles out of you and causing a warm rush to creep up your neck. The man sure knows his game, touching all the right places, playing with your body just perfectly, luring you into a very much needed and longed ecstasy. On top of that, he was nothing but generous and seemed to get himself off by getting you off and, now that you’re thinking about it, a man acting that way in bed is something entirely new to you.

You have to send Natasha a present, maybe that expensive vodka she’s always drinking…

The memory of your friend quickly fades and the sinful picture of Bucky Barnes’s face between your legs pops back into your mind as you drop the pancakes on a plate and sit by the counter to devour them with your coffee. What a night you had. The whole no strings attached situation makes it even more… enjoyable, you dare say, much more than you thought it would be. There is no dwelling on whether you should text him to say hello, or call him, no need to hold back who you really are or what you really want in favor to make a good impression, nor to think about meeting friends, family, no fear of disappointments from both sides… it was just plain good old sex, which you’ve realized it’s all you need and are looking for.

You hum at the sweet taste of the pancake and take a sip from your coffee. There’s no worries in your mind, no regrets, nothing like that. Except for one thought: the fact you didn’t even get to see his cock. The bulge alone grinding against you was already impressive enough to make your mouth water… Everything was amazing, more than perfect, actually, and left you completely spent and utterly satisfied, more than you’ve been in a long time, if you’re going to be honest with yourself. But now you only get to imagine how it would be if you two had gotten to the whole package, the real deal…

Unless…

You had thought about that night as a one-time occurrence, something to take your edge off and move on, but… He did propose a deal… And you did take said deal… to call him if you needed anything… You stare dreamily ahead as you take a fork filled with pancake to your mouth and flashes of the feeling of his bulge pressed against your back, grinding on your core take over your senses… it took your breath away then and just the memory is making a number on your lungs.

You sure have a need now.

Glimpsing your phone over the balcony, you reach for it, loving you don’t have to care whether it is too soon or not to do what you’re about to do…but a new message pops up on the screen as soon as you unlock it. Natasha letting you know she was sent away for a mission with Steve Rogers but should go back in a week and wanted to schedule dinner for you to tell her everything… You type her a quick answer, agreeing on dinner, before tapping on the brand new contact of your list, added by Natasha Romanoff herself.

Bucky “Soft Tongue” Barnes. 

You’ll change it. Eventually…

~~~

“So… my place this time, huh?”

The smirk on Bucky’s lips is cocksure enough to make you take a long sip of the beer he offered you, while he lazily leans his elbow on the backrest of his sofa, supporting his head on his hand. You’re thankful for the alcohol and for the fact that, this time, he hasn’t gone straight to business. Yes, you’ve been feeling bold and excited in having those kinds of encounters with a - hot as fuck - guy you barely knew. But this is new, and you know you must be careful and gentle to yourself, so it doesn’t blow up in your face eventually. Thankfully, Bucky seems to read the situation just fine since he’s been in cue with your rhythm from the very first moment. 

“Did you have any other plans?” you ask, biting your lower lip and hoping your presence isn’t actually a bother.

“I was happy to see your text.” Even if his answer is kind of vague considering your question, it eases the tension on your shoulders at his wide and comforting smile, “We did make a deal…” His voice is a tone lower as he peeks at you from under his lashes, taking his beer to his lips.

You take in a deep breath as your gaze drops to his lips, “Yes, we did.” You gulp, as your body tightens, feeling the rise of the tension in the air, enhanced by flashes of last night when you two settled said deal. 

His chuckle is a tad dark and laced with mischief and oh, man it makes your skin tingles when he drags his body just an inch closer, his beautiful blue eyes fastened on you.

“Ahm, Bucky… can I ask you something?” You try not to let your voice come out too small, as the heat of his body rolls off to yours and makes your core flutter.

“Sure.”

“How does this work?” 

He frowns as his head tilts a bit sideward, “This what?”

“This… ahm,” you clear your throat, “Deal… I mean, I’m pretty interested, pretty, pretty interested.” You stress the word and your eyes widen a bit at the honesty slipping out of your lips, but you realize that’s actually how being around Bucky has made you feel, giving his own honesty behavior with you, just like now when he expresses no kind of reaction that would make you feel embarrassed or anything of that nature, so you let yourself continue, “But you must know I’ve got out of a relationship recently. It was really serious …10 years.” You chuckle when he huffs and takes a sip of his beer, “Anyway, I’m not really sure how to handle this.” You gesture between you two, “Should we establish any sort of rules, or something?” You shrug questioningly. Every single movie you saw or book you read where the characters had a deal like that they ended up establishing some rules, you’re not sure if that’s what you’re supposed to do here, but…

“Rules?” His whole face scrunches up, “Let me tell you something, sweetheart,” he lets out a long exhale, “My entire life, all I did was to follow damn rules. Even to this day, I have to follow them all the time in my job, whether is from the fucking government, the pain in my ass which is Stark or Fury and, believe me, even from the giant asshole of my best friend who’s pretty jacked up now but was nothing than a skinny angry ass, like, yesterday… Yeah, you know the punk, don’t you?” He smiles when you hold back a laugh, “It’s all about rules, rules, rules… I have to endure them when it comes to work, but I don’t like them in my personal life.”

He smiles that dazzling smile and you can’t help to offer him a small one, too. You see where he’s coming from. Given what you know of his life, he lived a very strict, military life ever since an early age in the 30’s. You don’t even have to elaborate on what happened next and everything he endured… now he’s part of the damn Avengers… Just like that, you start to get a bit more of Bucky Barnes and why he seems to live his life so lightly and freely now…

“Listen…” he continues, after taking a sip from his beer, “Let’s just have some fun… I loved spending time with you last night, I love that you’re here now and I love even more the prospects of tonight…” He smirks and you gulp down at the promise that comes with it, “I just wanna enjoy our time together, I don’t need rules to do that.” He pauses, as his face turns a bit more serious, differing from the light demeanor he’s been showing so far, “Do you wanna set any rules, though?”

You ponder his question. You did bring the subject up, because that’s what you think you should’ve done, but, now that you think about it, nothing comes to your mind. You kinda love his philosophy. No overthinking, just fun and no rules… “No, actually. I can’t think of anything,’ you decide.

“Great.” He smiles and nods, before his face turns serious again, “There’s one thing I need to clear up, though.” He stops and looks deeply into your eyes, as waiting for your consent before continuing.

“Oh, alright.” You encourage him to elaborate.

“As much as I’m looking forward to getting to know you and spending time with you, there’s absolutely no prospect of this turning into some kind of romantic relationship. See, I like the way I live my life too much and chances are I won’t be exclusive to you,” he says fixing his gaze on yours as if gauging your reaction to what his words, “What I’m saying is if I feel like it, I’ll have sex with other people and I highly encourage you to do the same if that’s something you want. The serum made me immune to any disease, but I’m obviously not against protection,” he adds and you feel your cheeks burning, it still blows you away how comfortably he talks about sex and how blatantly honest he is. You like and are getting used to it, but you’re just not there yet, “We can be friends, or not, we can just fuck our brains out, but we won’t go further than that. I need to know you’re aware and consenting on this, I need to know you’re on the same vibe as mine before we continue… having fun together.” He speaks seriously, but you see the tiny and suggestive curl on his lips when he finishes and waits for your answer.

You let out a small laugh under your breath, “I wouldn’t stress about it… I’m still in love with my boyfriend, to be honest. So, don’t worry about me wanting to turn this into something ahm… romantical.” You wave your hand between the two of you. 

“Uh, ok,” He raises a brow and nods, pondering your response, “We’re cool then?” He checks again.

“We’re cool,” You nod and raise your beer.

He promptly bumps his bottle to yours as you seal your deal with a toast and a shared smile.

“So, still in love with him, huh?” He asks, absentmindedly, after you two take a sip from the beer, “Was it a bad break up?”

“Not really,” you answer, looking down at your finger circling the rim of the bottle, “I just wasn’t expecting it… I thought I was gonna spend the rest of my life with him… it was settled.” You shrug, “And then, nothing was certain anymore. I’m sorry,” you quickly add, shaking your head with a tight smile on your lips. The last thing you want is to talk about Eddie. And you’re pretty sure that’s not what Bucky expects from the night, either.

“Hey.” He hooks his finger under your chin, lifting it up so you look back at him, “No rules remember? We can talk, we’re not sex robots or anything.”

Your head falls back when you laugh, “Alright.” You nod as he smiles at you, “But I don’t really want to talk about my breakup, now.”

He nods back, accepting your position, “Can I ask you something?” He’s the one to talk again after you two drink from the beer, “Last night,” he continues when you give him your consent, “When I went down on you. Was that the first time?”

There he goes again, talking so freely… You don’t feel your cheeks burning this time, though.

“No,” you answer, and he lifts his eyebrows, showing a bit of surprise at the answer, “It was the second, actually…” You’re quick to add, tightening your lips, “That obvious, huh?” You laugh quietly as your shoulders drop a bit. 

Bucky shrugs, “It’s just that you seemed a bit self-conscious about it…” He brings his bottle to his lips, but stops it midair, “At first…” he smirks at you once again and winks. 

You let out a small chuckle, looking down, playing with the almost empty bottle in your hands, “And I was…” You turn your body to face him, folding your legs on his sofa and leaning your arm on his backrest. It might be the alcohol, or just his laid-back and comforting presence that makes you want to share it with him, “You see, I’ve dated Eddie since college and he was my first…you know?” You bit on your lower lip as he nods at you to continue, nothing changing on his expression at the information, “And what happened was that he was never really a fan of that… we tried once, years ago and that was it… I knew he was grossed out by it, so I never asked him again.”

Clearing your throat, you look away, bringing you your beer to your lips to conceal any sign of embarrassment your face might indicate, you can’t believe you just shared that with him, you know how pitiful that sounds and what a turn off that must be. You’re there to have sex and are sharing how unexperienced you are? Not cool.

You feel his eyes fixed on you, and, when your gaze is attracted to his like a magnet, the pity you thought you would see on his face just isn’t there. Instead, it’s something entirely different you catch on his expression and his eyes. Never parting his focus from you, he puts his beer on the center table and reaches for yours, placing it next to his. He drags his body closer, and his smell – no cologne, just his own manly smell with a hint of what must be a fancy shampoo- fills in your nostrils, making you breathe in deeply the inebriant scent, “You know what came to my mind while I was listening to you?”

The sultry tone in his voice is almost hypnotic as your lips part and your gaze drops to his, “What?” you murmur.

“Last night…” He licks his lips before drawing his lower one between his teeth, “Your taste…” He leans forward, brushing his lips on your earlobe, causing your breath to hitch in your throat, “Your shaky legs around my shoulders…” His flash hand finds your knee before sneaking up your thigh, carrying goosebumps on its way, “And those sinful sounds you made while I had your pussy in my mouth.” He grabs your earlobe in a gentle bite at the same time his wandering hand grabs harshly the flesh of your thigh underneath your dress, pulling a breathy whine out of you.

He drags his lips to yours and the kiss is sensual, slow moves of his tongue against yours as his lips are a soft and breathtaking caress. You realize you would be willing to spend the whole night just like that… kissing him, as your tongue laces around his and he lures you to melt into him… But he seems to have other plans in mind. You can’t help but seek his lips again as he parts them from yours. 

“And this is what thinking about all of that does to me…” Boring his blue, now darker than ever, eyes on yours he grabs your hand from your lap and brings it to the bulge in his pants.

You gasp at the sensation in your hand as he guides your hand with his to brush the firm and large hardness. Everything about the situation is sexy and makes you light in your head and hot in your body: the way he moans as you move your hand, his warm breath slipping from his parted lips and fanning over yours, how his eyes flutter for just a second before fixing on yours again, his scent, his shameless words… 

“Just to think about eating your pussy…the mere thought of it…. Fuck, it turns me on,” he whispers and lets go of your hand, allowing it to move on its own as he lunges at you again, kissing and nibbling your lips a lot harder than the first time

You kiss him back fiercely while keeping your hand on his cock, palming it through his jeans. You already can tell how thick he is and a fluttering sensation bubbles down your lower belly as the desire to feel his cock inside you takes over your senses and makes you weak in your legs.

“Shit, I can’t wait to do that again…” He drags his lips down your collarbone, whispering between kisses and licks on your skin, “But right now, what I want is to feel your pussy around my cock. Is that what you want, too?”

“Oh, yeah,” you promptly answer, eyelashes fluttering shut at the thought as you press your hand harder against his hardness and digs your finger on his loose locks, “I want it… I want this cock so bad.”

“Bedroom,” he announces, swiftly getting up and pulling you with him.

By the time you get to his bedroom, he already has his shirt off and you’re only in your set of black lingerie, discarded clothes and shoes left on the short way from the living room. Peppering kisses down his neck, you unbutton and unzips his jeans. 

“Holy fuck.” It slips out of you in a breath when you look down and takes sight of his cock bobbing between you two as you pull his pants along with his underwear down his legs.

It’s big… and thick… and beautiful, you dare say…"Wow,“ it slips out of you unannounced as you keep staring down and you hear a chuckle from him, a tad too smug chuckle, because he damn well knows… of course, he does.

As he proceeds to ravish your neck, grabbing two handfuls of your ass through your underwear, you can’t help but wrap your fingers around him. You can’t take your eyes off your hand playing slowly with it, entranced by how thick and hard he is, anticipating the feeling of him inside you as you swipe your thumb over the tip…

“Stop, stop.” The rasped plea takes you out of your reverie as his forehead falls on your shoulder and his hand stops yours, “I’ll come all over your hand if you keep that up,’ he explains, laying a kiss on the crook of your neck.

You chuckle and bring your arms to circle his broad shoulders instead, peppering kisses on his stubbled jaw.

“Let’s go to bed, or this will be over too soon.” You can hear the smile on his lips as he squeezes your ass and steps out of his bunched jeans and underwear, guiding you to his bed.

Through kisses, licks, bites, and wandering hands on each other, he lays you down and positions himself hovering you after unhooking and taking off your bra with the same expertise from the night before. He focuses on your breasts, sucking each one of them with intense hunger before shifting on his knees, leaving your breasts and whole body burning for his touch.

He moves towards the nightstand and opens the drawer to get a condom. The position gives you a prime view of his fully erected cock. The little dark path turning into the well-trimmed little hairs right above it shows you how careful he is with himself and the thought of your tongue running down on it pops into your mind and sparks the electricity running down your inside. On its own will, your hand snakes down your stomach till your clothed mound. 

A particularly loud sigh of you is what catches Bucky’s attention as he rips the package with his teeth. His eyes drop to where your hand rubs you covered pussy and his cock twitches at the vision.

“Shit… yeah, touch yourself….” He breathes, as he rolls off the latex around his cock.

You promptly slide your fingers under your underwear and find out how wet you are. You draw gentle circles on your clit, never taking your eyes off his burly and beautiful figure, the tightness in your core is a crescendo as you catch every little detail of his perfect body and his hooded eyes on you.

Still kneeling on the mattress, he positions himself in front of your opened legs, but just stays there, hypnotized by the spot where you touch yourself, placing his hands on your knees and spreading your legs wider for him, his pupils growing darker and darker with lust.

You sigh and moan at the pleasure brought by your fingers, but the exposed situation you are in and the sight of him staring down so hungrily at your pussy prompts the tight coils flaming inside you. Just a couple of days and you’re finding out a few things you had no idea about yourself. One of them is that you actually love that kind of filthy exposition. It feels wrong and intimate and fucking sexy. 

He grips his cock, giving it a few slow strokes and it’s all a sweet torture that you can’t take anymore.

“Bucky…Please, fuck me.” Your voice comes out laced in a mix of plea and guttural groan you didn’t know you had in you.

Dark eyes flick to yours. “Oh, yeah? Do you want me to fuck you?” he teases, showing no mercy to your desperation.

“Hard…” you correct him, gritting your teeth, “I want you to fuck me hard.”

His eyes widen and his chest moves up when he sucks in a breath. You’re really that eager that you can’t control your words anymore, but you love the effect it has on him. He pulls your fingers from under the lace of your underwear and leans down to bring them to his mouth. Your lips part at the sexiest thing you’ve ever seen, his eyes fluttering shut as he moans sucking the two fingers clean. Your taste seems to stir something in him and the world around you spins when big strong hands turn you over roughly.

“On your fours,” he growls. The grasp of his hands on your ass tugs at your core.

You promptly comply, getting yourself in the position he wants you in as he keeps himself behind you. You yelp when he swiftly pulls your underwear down your knees, the lace stretching around them as he spreads your legs. Looking from over your shoulder you watch him cursing under his breath and gripping the base of his impossibly hard cock and guiding it to your slit, coating his hardness with your arousal.

“Holy fuck,” you whisper as the hardness brushes against your clit.

“In a second…” He smirks when his gaze crosses yours. He leans over and pushes your back down, positioning your ass in the air as you lay your head on his pillow. Bucky grabs your hand and guides it to your pussy.

He doesn’t need to say what he wants you to do as your fingers quickly start working on your clit and he aligns himself with your entrance. He pushes the tip in and it knocks the air out of your lungs as you brace yourself on his pillows with your unoccupied hand, speeding up the finger on your clit. Bucky groans as he pushes himself in, inch by inch. You’re soaking wet and he doesn’t find much resistance, but it’s been a year for you, so you’re very aware of the stretch on his way in.

“Shit,” you wheeze, loving how full you feel when he’s all his way in, both of his hands grasping your hips tightly. 

“Oh, damn, you feel amazing.” He groans and you clench around him, “Oooo, someone has a praise kink, huh?” A teasing tone in his words.

Do you? You wouldn’t know… all you know is how your whole body and mind respond to having him inside you and how his sultry words make your head dizzy. It’s an aching and floating sensation all at once. You feel light and heavy and hot and eager for him to move.

Like he’s reading your mind, he starts his pace. His fat cock stretches your walls at every jerk of his hips, increasing in rhythm as it feels easier for him to slide in and out of you. It doesn’t take long before he’s pounding into you, a punishing hold on your hips to keep you steady enough to him. Being the discoverer of your weakness, he punctuates every pound with grunted words of praise, telling how good and wet you feel around his cock. 

He feels good, too. He feels so damn good, his cock brushing and hitting all of the sweetest spots inside you, the sound of skin slapping against skin… Your mind is a fuzz and your head sinks into his pillow, muffling your moans as you just take it, your body moving along with his powerful thrusts. The coil that’s been twisting your lower belly getting tighter and tighter. You want to come on his cock so bad, you press your fingers hard against your sensitive numb.

“Fuck, yeah, work on that clit, I wanna feel you soaking that cock,” Bucky coos, curling an arm around your stomach and, when you notice, you’re on your knees with your back to his chest. Slick skin burns against slick skin as he drags his metal hand over yours on your pussy, guiding your finger in a different direction, making you gasp at the new sensation the subtle shift brings.

“Oh, God.” You can’t and don’t want to hold back anymore as it’s all more than you can handle and the tightness inside your belly washes over your core in sheer ecstasy. Your back arches and your head falls back on his shoulder as you cry out a mindblowing orgasm.

“Shh,” he whispers in your ear, slowing down his pace, “That’s it, oh fuck,” he curses at the feel of your cunt gripping his cock.

Your senses aren’t fully functioning yet when he pulls out, throws you back on the mattress and flips you over, swiftly taking off the underwear that was stretched around your knees. A delicious smile curls your lips at all the manhandling because you want more and he’s giving it to you, driving himself inside you again, lifting your legs with his forearms, resting them over his shoulders and not holding back on the almost inhuman speed as he thrusts his hips.

He leans over, captures your lips and you curl your arms around his neck as he fucks you. Hard. Just like you said you wanted him to. You had no idea you were so flexible but what a way to find out, having the hottest guy you’ve ever met balls deep -really deep - into you while his tongue curls around yours.

Parting his lips from yours he releases your legs and they promptly wrap them around his hips as he supports himself with his forearms on each side of you and arches his back and to allow him to drag his lips to ravish your breasts, which he seems pretty fond of already. You push his thrusts impossibly harder and deeper with your feet as he alternates from sucking one and the other, licking and grazing his teeth around your sensitive nipples, your vision blanking at the light pain mixed with the pleasure he’s giving to you with his mouth and his damn perfect cock inside you. He doesn’t give you time to cool down from the last orgasm as your mind freezes, focusing solely on the dazzling sensations in your body. 

“So fucking sexy.” The praise reverberates through your skin and it really seems to be a kink of yours as, joined with the expert roll of his hips, he brings you to another orgasm. A smaller one compared to the first, but powerful enough to make your body shake and to coax a series of moans out of you.

Bucky lets your breast go with a popping sound after a particularly hard suck and shifts back to his knees. 

Still in the daze of your second orgasm, a weak sound leaves your lips through panting breathing as your hips leave the mattress when, pulling your legs straighten up together and keeping them securely against his chest with one arm, he pounds into you until an guttural grunt rolls from his lungs and his hips still. He shoves his hips into yours a couple of times, deep and powerful,, spilling his own pleasure into the condom, before letting your legs loose and pulling out. The sensitivity etches a hiss out of you before his body drops next to yours. 

For a while, all that fills the room is the sound of sharp pants from both of you. In the past year, you came to think to think that maybe sex wasn’t that important to you and that maybe it wouldn’t matter if it happened or not…What a damn fool. 

You do like sex. Love it, actually. And it is fucking amazing and important to you, no doubt of that, you realize while your eyes shut and you allow yourself to drown into the delicious ache that covers your muscles while aftershocks of your orgasms cause occasional spasms all over your body.

“Holy shit.” Bucky’s the first one to speak, still fighting to breathe, “That was-”

“Fucking amazing,” you complete, breathing hard, but with a blissful smile on your lips you tilt your head towards him, “Thank you, Bucky. You have no idea how much I needed this.” You add, too deep in your daze to care whether you sound pathetic or not.

He laughs loudly and the corner of his eyes crinkle with it, “My pleasure, beautiful, my pleasure.”

A few more moments pass with both of you laying there and enjoying the after state of what you just did until the mattress moves when he gets up.

You gather your strength to lift your head enough to watch him walking towards the bathroom, rolling off the condom out of his semi hard cock.

As you’re alone in his bed, that’s when an awkward feeling freezes up your chest in contrast to the heat you’ve surrendered to so far. What the hell are you supposed to do now? Do you leave? Do you stay? Can you take a shower? You could definitely use one… You know he said no rules and you agreed, but some guidance would suit you pretty well right now. 

“Hey,” his voice takes you out of your own mind puzzle, “Your turn.” A soft towel is thrown at your face.

You grab it in your hands and look up at him with a glare. He’s laughing as he walks towards you, still butt naked, and your glare quickly dissipates into a playful one. “The bathroom is all yours now. There is liquid soap, shampoo and other stuff there if you need them,” he offers casually, sitting by the corner of the bed, “I’m starving, Chinese sounds good?”

You sit, too, holding the towel in your hand, “Yeah,” you frown before nodding “Sure, Chinese sounds great, actually.”

“Alrighty, then.” He taps on the mattress and gets up. You gaze falls down to his perky butt cheeks moving as he walks towards the door. He stops by the frame and looks back at you with that mischievous look of his, “Then, I’ll be ready for dessert.” He darts out that sinful tongue of his and runs it over his lips. 

The brief awkward coldness you felt is replaced by a flush of a welcoming heat creeping up your body.

You smirk back at him, “Can’t wait.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You have a reason to celebrate and need a partner!

Screen after screen pops in the air in front of you as you furiously type codes and formulas on them. You’re there, you’re almost there. You’ve been working on this project for months and now it finally seems like you’re getting somewhere.

“Coffee?”

You just nod as an answer to Camilla, your partner on that project. She gets up and walks out to go get the coffee. She already told you if it was up to her, you’ve already given up. But you know you’re getting there. You haven’t stopped working ever since early hours and you’re feeling inspired and focused as ever.

When you’re satisfied with the input you add to the system which is working on the calculations, you sit back. Eyes on the screen displayed in the air. Camilla comes back with your coffees and hands one to you, fixing her eyes on the screen, too as she stands beside you.

“Come on, come on,” you whisper.

Bringing the coffee to your lips you almost choke on it when the answer you were so desperately looking for gleams on the screen.

“Holy shitballs,” you shout and swiftly gets up, letting your cup drop to the floor, splashing the liquid around.

“Oh, fuck,” Camilla gasps and you two look at each other with paired up widened eyes before letting out a cheerful scream and holding each other, jumping around as you gain the attention of the other workers from the several small offices of the Avengers/Stark Technology Department.

A clear of throat takes you and your friend out of your reverie, catching your attention. When you see Sharon Carter on your door, with a smirk on her lips, you two cease the celebration, but keep the smiles on your faces.

“Hey, Sh- Director,” you quickly correct yourself, being friends with Natasha brought you close to Sharon, too. But now she’s Director of Shield, after Nick Fury became coordinator of the Avengers, therefore you should show some respect at least at workplaces, “Remember that Shield and Avengers’ joined project? The one where we were trying to build a device that would crack alien secret services codes?”

“Yeah, sure, our tech departments have been working for months to find an algorithm.” Sharon nods.

“Well, looks like we made it.” You point at the screen right in front of you.

“What the hell?” She shoots an eyebrow high and steps into the office, eyes analyzing the screen between you two.

“We doesn’t quite cut it, Director,” Camilla says, rolling her eyes, “She worked her ass off and got to it by herself. She’s been killing it these last few days.”

You huff, shaking your head. You’ve been really inspired, indeed. And you might relate it to a certain physical activity you’ve been engaging on recently and the outrageous amount of energizing orgasms you’ve been gifted with almost daily… not a topic to be brought out now, though. 

“Ooo, someone seems extra inspired…” Sharon narrows her eyes, but you try to not indulge any possible insinuation by just ignoring the comment with a smile, “Well, that’s amazing news,” she resumes, clapping her hands once, “and it kind of leads to the subject that brought me here, would you mind excuses for a second, Camilla?” She kindly asks.

“Of course, not. I’ll be in my office.” Camilla says, not holding back from hugging you and squirming in excitement one more time before walking out the room.

“This is huge, huh?” Sharon comments, pulling up the chair you pointed for her as you sit on yours. 

“It is, can you imagine what Natasha will be able to do with it?” You grin, brushing your hands together.

“Thanks to your badass brain,” she compliments before narrowing her eyes at you again, “You have a weird happy face.”

“Well, something amazing just happened…”

“Yeah, yeah…” Sharon brushes you off, “You’re killing it at your job and that’s amazing… but to be honest, I expected to still see you moping around about your break up.”

“I’m still sad about it, but work has been great, and-”

“Oh, cut the crap,” Sharon interrupts with a playful snap and you frown while she crosses her arms in front of her, holding back a laugh, “I’ve been texting with Natasha, I know about you and your boytoy.”

“What the hell?” Your eyes widen as you throw your arms to the air, already feeling your cheeks warming, “She’s on a mission and you two have been talking about my… sex life?” You lean over across the table and whisper the last part.

“We can multitask,” Sharon shrugs like it’s no big deal.

“Oh, wow…” you scoff, “That’s two of the greatest spies on earth right.”

“Alright,” She chuckles, unfolding her arms and leaning over the table, “As much as I want to know all about it, that’s not why I’m here.”

“Ok,” you quickly accept the change of subject for your own relief, “Why are you here for, then?”

“To tell you that Stark is a jerk,” she deadpans.

“Ok… cool,” you drag the words, side eyeing her, “And?”

“Long story short, I lost you in a chess match and now you’re the new leader of Avengers/Stark Tech Department.”

You don’t quite assimilate what she just said as you keep your questioning stare on her, not finding the link between her words and, most of all, did she just say you’ve been promoted?

“I’m sorry, what?” You shake your head shutting your eyes for a second, finally asking for clarification after what seemed like the longest staring contest ever.

“Well,” Sharon sighs, “You know how competitive Stark and I can be and when I decided to act by ethics and told him I was considering offering you the leadership position at Shield’s tech department he decided he would do the same and dared me to a chess match, where you would be the prize.” She shrugs, “I’m sure he had some help, right Friday,” she raises her voice staring up to the air but gains plain silence as a response from the A.I, “He won and got to keep you and I got stuck with my second option which is your ex, as you might already know.”

“Wow,” you whisper, not really sure what to say or feel, trying to process all of what you just heard.

“You’re not offended by the chess match, are you?” Sharon checks, tilting her head.

“No… I’m kinda… flattered, I guess.” You frown and Sharon gives you a satisfied smile. “But… I’m confused… That’s Stark’s job.”

“It’s your job now if you should accept it.” She grins wider, “I guess he’s been thinking about it for a while now and saw my offering as an opportunity. I know Pepper has been on his ass for him to loosen up from some responsibilities, and who better than you to take over?” She points up at the screen with your recent achievement.

You let out a breathy laugh, reality finally dawning. Not in a million years you thought that would happen but now that it is, you’re not gonna be modest, you kick ass in your job and you fucking deserve it.

“He’s on a mission with Nat and Steve now, so he asked me to come talk to you, hang on…” Sharon holdsup a finger, before grabbing a small device from her pocket, which you recognize as one of your projects. “Stark,” she says.

In a second the image of a very battered Tony surfaces on the air as the camera captures his face from under the suit. 

“Hey, Carter,” he greets with a smirk as you hear the sounds of blasts, shots and explosions. The man is in the middle of a damn battle while casually answering a call. 

“Stark,” Sharon answers just as casually, “I have her here with me, just delivered the news,” she says, turning his image to you.

“Hey, boss,” you give him a shy wave.

“Hey, kid.” He scrunches up his face, shooting a series of blasts before you listen to something exploding. “I think you’re sort of my boss now.” He focuses on you again, smirking.

“No, I’m not,” you laugh.

“No, you’re not. But, tell me, what’s your answer?”

“I take it, of course.” You decide, why in the world, wouldn’t you.

“Great. Party to celebrate when we come back. Gotta go, these damn Kree are the worst. Will not invite them.” He turns off and his image disappears from before you.

“Well, congratulations.” Sharon places the device back on her pocket, “Our departments work a lot together, so I think I win either way.”

A mix of emotions fill up your chest. You’re excited and happy and scared. Mostly excited, though… “Holy shit,” you curse, digging your hands into your hair as a grin seems to twist your lips permanently.

“You need to celebrate…” Sharon adds, offering you a cheeky grin.

Fuck yeah, you need to celebrate. And you know exactly what, or better, who you wanna do.

~~~

“How the hell are you wet already?”

The words are spoken against your neck through licks and sucks, after Bucky’s fingers glided under your underwear and sank between your slick folds. As soon as he walked into your living room, he jumped on you with kisses and grabs, discovering you in such a state without his previous help.

Well, sort of without his help, actually. The thing is, after you got out of work that afternoon, you didn’t even need to call him or text him to propose your little celebration as you found a series of texts from “Bucky Sweet Tongue Barnes” waiting for you. In the first, he was asking if you had any plans that night, and the others… oh, the others… the fucker described all sorts of filthy things he wanted to do with you.

After a quick answer for him to come over and a long bath, all the dirty details he used on his texts refused to leave your mind and you couldn’t help but spending the rest of the time you had alone before he arrived teasing yourself with your fingers, having all those images and flashes from your last encounters in your memory to keep you going.

“I-“ you gasp as he sucks that sensitive spot in your neck and his fingers meet your clit, “Those texts you sent me…” You tilt your head to give his lips more room, your hands roaming around the hard pattern of muscles on his back, “I-I’ve been touching myself.” You confess with the lack of pudency you’re becoming familiar with when you’re around him.

In your arms, you feel when his body freezes for a second, before he sucks harder on your neck, “Fuck… did you come today already?” He gropes your ass under your dress with the hand that isn’t in your pussy. 

Your eyelids flutter and you reach down to the front of his pants to feel the growing bulge, “Yes…”

“Goddammit, that’s hot,” he grunts, and then it all happens in a blur as he lifts you by hooking his hands under your thighs and places you seated over the dinner table.

He positions himself between your opened legs as lifting up your short dress out of his way and, while you swiftly work on the buttons and zipper of his jeans, he takes a condom out of his pockets and, after ripping the plastic off with his teeth he hands it to you.

His eyes cast down to see your fingers rolling off the latex around his rock hard cock and, as soon as you’re done and wrap your hand around him to feel his thickness, he wastes no time and pushes you backwards until your back meets the cold wood of your table. 

Acting by the frenzy that is all over his eyes, he swiftly pulls the small fabric of your underwear to the side, exposing your cunt just enough before he holds his cock and pushes himself inside you, making you cry out and your body jerk backwards. You always knew spending an exorbitant amount of money on a good table would pay off someday and you hold yourself fisting each side of the table.

He pulls your thighs up wrapping his hands on your knees, giving you no time to adjust before starting to pound into you.

You love that he fucks you like that. Hard and raw, the sting of the stretching mixed with the pleasure brought by his expert thrusts fogging your mind and his thickness and expert moves hitting sweet spots of yours, kicking the air out of your lungs. You love that in the few times you’ve been doing it in the last week, he already seems to know what you can take and always somehow goes a little further, a little different… like he knows something about yourself that you don’t, yet. That it’s the first time that you two can’t be bothered to wait and take off clothes or get to the bedroom. You love it.

It is all new to you, yes. For you sex has always been attached to some kind of affection or romantic feelings and, while that is all good and wonderful, you’re enjoying so much finding out this other side, where the only goals are to share pleasure and have fun. 

“So fucking sexy,” he groans through clenched teeth.

Your core twists in response and your cunt clenches around his cock, causing him to let out a grunt and quicken his pace even more, making it extra difficult to breathe properly. Oh, he’s found out that praise kink of yours and now he’s been using it wisely, so wisely…

He reaches over to pull down the stripe of your dress and exposes one breast. A loud moan slips out of you when he roughly kneads the soft flesh. He keeps the metal hand around one of your knees while the leg he let go in favor to give your breast some attention curls around his hips, jerking along with the punishing pace of his thrusts.

“Yeah, sweetheart, so sexy… I’ve wanted to have you like this ever since I first saw that sweet ass of yours,” he confesses right before leaning over to wrap his mouth around your nipple.

You’ve been horny the whole day waiting for the moment you would have his cock inside you just like that and the praise, as tacky as it may be, joined with the warmth of his wet tongue around your breast and the stimulation against your clit that the new position brings prompt the blast of ecstasy inside your core.

With a trembling moan, you let go the edges of the table to hold his body pressed to yours as his mouth moves from your breast to attack your neck. You roll your hips, trying to prolong the pleasure unleashed as his pace falters.

The fingers of both his hands dig into your hair, making a mess of it as he pulls out his cock almost completely before shoving it deeply and harshly one more time, grunting out his own release. 

“Fuck,” it slips from under his heavy breath before he clasps his lips on yours. The kiss is wet and sloppy and lazy as you have your legs and arms curled around his body, keeping him inside you.

Still feeling a little numb from the orgasm he just gave you – a thousand times better than the one you had given yourself- you gasp and chuckle through the kiss as he straightens up and pulls you with him. You tighten the hold of your arms and legs, as he conveniently holds you by your ass until he finds the couch and sits down with you straddling his hips. He breaks the kiss and lets his head fall on the backrest, his chest moving up and down as he tries to catch his breath.

You move up to let his cock slide off but he tightens the hold on your ass, keeping you in place, “Just… let me stay in a bit more, it feels so good,” he says, eyes shut, still resting his head back on the sofa.

“Alright,” you chuckle, straddling his face with your arms as you place your hands on the backrest. You find the request a bit odd but also sexy as hell. There he is, always a step ahead on what you don’t even know you think it’s hot… 

After a few more seconds, when his breath – and yours- seems to come back to normal, he straightens his head and looks down at where you still have just one breast exposed. He ticks his tongue, “Let’s not make the other one feel left out.” He pulls your other strap, letting now both of your breasts bare to him before he dips in, grabbing the up till now covered one with his lips.

You shake your head, laughing at his antics, “You seem pretty fond of them, huh?”

He lets go of the mound with a pop, looking up at you with an almost shocked expression on his face, “How could I not?” he gasps, like you’ve just offended him, “I don’t know how you see them in the mirror everyday and don’t touch yourself…” he squints at you before continuing, “You do, don’t you?”

You laugh harder, letting your head fall back and he smiles at you before going back to give your tits some attention, kissing and sucking one, then the other. Noticing that his cock never really softens completely inside you, you let him enjoy himself a bit more before speaking again, “Did you mean that?”

“What?” He leans back, looking up at you.

“You said you wanted to fuck me ever since you met me… is that serious? I didn’t even know you remembered me before we… started this.”

“First of all, I’m always serious, I never lie,” he says, adding some gravity to his tone, “Second of all, remember that night a while ago, when I chatted with you and your boyfriend at a Stark’s party and then your sexy ass talked about your work with technology with such passion… you knew exactly what you were talking about and, fuck…” he licks his lips, ”I rubbed one out for you later that night,” he smirks, clasping his hands behind his head.

Your jaw drops at the reveal before your face scrunches up, “That’s…gross?” you say the first word that comes to mind.

“But it’s true,” he shrugs, looking pretty comfortable with the confession, “and ever since I’ve been thinking about tapping that smart ass of yours.” He emphasizes his point by slapping your ass once.

Despite that and his choice of words - which makes your cheeks heat up - and your previous statement of being grossed out by the revelation, you decide you take that as kind of a compliment, which leads you to give him the news.

“You know?” you say, “I was promoted today. You just fucked the new leader of the Avengers/Stark tech department,” you grin when his practically hard cock twitches inside you.

“Wow, congratulations.” His eyes widen and he grins back at you. 

“Never thought I would meet someone with a technology kink,” you comment, laughing at his first reaction to the news.

“More of a smart as fuck brain kink, sweetheart,” he reaches behind you to slap your ass for the second time that night, making you shriek and laugh a bit harder, “Ok, we need to celebrate,” he states.

“I am celebrating,” you aim a mischievous smile at him, rolling your hips for good measure.

“Damn,” he breathes, but holds your hips still, “No, I mean, you’ve been in a relationship for ten years, tell me…” he squints at you, “When was the last time you partied your ass off?”

“Ahm…” you think hard trying to remember when it was, “College, I guess?”

“Shit…” he lowers his head before swiftly getting up, making you lunge your arms on his shoulders so you wouldn’t fall back as he walks to your bedroom, “Come on, let’s freshen up. This is huge news… I’ll take you to a real party now and then we can continue our private one later,” he promises.

~~~

As soon as you walk in the rooftop bar Bucky has chosen, you already decide you did good in accepting his offer. The place is gorgeous, sporting a modern, yet cozy decoration with small tables, sofas and puffs for those who want to sit. Dazzling lights flash on the dance floor right by a huge bar and the view of the city is mesmerizing while the beat of the music reverberates through your body.

Bucky pulls you by the hand through the sea of bodies. Thank god you chose one of the fanciest dresses of your wardrobe or else you wouldn’t fit in among the beautiful people crowding the place. Every once in a while, Bucky waves and nods at someone or a group of people. You can tell he’s a regular. 

He waves more excitedly to a group of women hanging on a mezzanine, before pulling you to that direction, “Come on,” he tilts his head back towards you with a smile, “You’ll love them.”

As soon as you approach the group, he puts his arm around your shoulders and introduces you to everyone, telling you the names of each stunning woman before you, Amanda, Emma, Jada, Alice and Brianna. They all friendly greet him and you with smiles, excited hellos and hugs, welcoming you two to join them, which you do.

“You know, Y/N was promoted today,” Bucky gushes and you smile at him.

“Oh, wow,” Amanda says through the cheerful congratulating words from everyone else, “This calls for champagne.” She then whistles and makes a sign for a bartender, who in a matter of seconds sends two bottles of fancy champagne to the group. 

A few minutes after the toast, you’re drinking and chatting with those women like you’ve been best friends your whole life, especially with Amanda, who goes out of her way to make you feel included. You can see how close they all are to Bucky, like he’s one of the gang, talking about any kind of subject in front of him and vice versa. Bucky stays by your side, and only when you’re completely mingled with the group he excuses himself to go grab what he called “a real drink” at the bar.

“He’s incredible, isn’t he?” Amanda nudges you when Bucky is at a distance he can’t hear.

“Oh yeah,” you nod, “Bucky’s a great guy.”

“She means in bed, dear,” Brianna clarifies with a giggle.

You take a look around the group to see them all giving you mischievous and knowing stares. Oh…

“Oh, did all of you…?” you point your finger at them, but you don’t have to complete the question

“More like all of this rooftop,” Brianna laughs, followed shortly by the others. 

“So, he’s amazing isn’t he?” Amanda insists, wiggling her eyebrows.

You’re not sure if it’s the alcohol or the fact that they all seem so friendly and open minded, but something makes you blurt out, “Amazing? He’s fucking fantastic.”

They all nod and verbalize their agreement, “I tell you all something,” Jada catches your attention, “That man drinks respect women juice daily and we owe him a toast. Here’s to Bucky,” she raises her glass.

“To Bucky.” You all mimic her through laughing and make a toast to the unsuspicious man at the bar.

As the conversation moves on and they all engage in different topics your gaze wanders to where he stands, holding a glass with some liquor that looks like whiskey in hands. But he’s not alone anymore. A statuesque blond is right beside him, laughing and touching his arm. You glimpse that flirting smile of him forming on his lips.

“You don’t mind do you?” Amanda’s voice makes you turn to her, spotting a questioning look on her face, “Because if you do… Girl, run away now, Bucky isn’t right for you.” There’s no malice on her voice, just a sincere warning tone.

You seize the moment to make an honest survey through your feelings. You’ve been warned by different people, Bucky included, and if there’s anything to worry about, Amanda is right, you should run now. As you keep your eyes on the two of them by the bar, you look and look and look inside, but find nothing that could be remotely taken as jealousy or something like that. If anything, it’s kind of liberating to know that you have so much fun with him and there’s no ugly, selfish feelings pulling you back. You feel like you could encourage the blonde on the flirting, because you know how damn incredible it can be…

Who would wonder that a class A womanizer like Bucky would be the source of such sheer sorority you’ve been experiencing that night…

“No,” you turn back to Amanda, shaking your head with a satisfied smile, “I don’t mind at all.”

The night goes on and Bucky comes and goes, chatting and drinking and laughing with you and your new little group of friends, taking you to dance, but also dancing with Amanda, Emma, Alice, Jada, Brianna and some others… A number of guys also approach you, take you to dance, buy you drinks and you end up with a few new phone numbers in your contact list. You party like you haven’t in a while and like you didn’t think women your age still did, which is stupid… You’ve been so caught up in the routine of your relationship with Eddie that you’ve forgotten there’s a whole world spinning out there.

An exciting and fun world.

“Hey,” the familiar voice reaches your ear and makes you smile as you’re on the dance floor with the girls. The metal hand curls around your belly and pulls you before your back brushes against his chest, “Having fun?” Bucky asks, lips on your ears.

“Yes, so much.” You tilt your head and place your hands over his while his hips sway with yours.

“Hummm,” he pulls you closer and runs the tip of his nose over the length of your neck, “I’m glad.”

“However…” you sigh, loving how his hips move in rhythm with yours, “I think I’m ready to continue our other party at home.”

“Funny,” he chuckles and his tongue darts out before he swiftly brushes it against your neck. It’s quick and very discreet, but enough to set your core into flames, “I was thinking the exact same thing.”

With that, you promptly let go of him and proceed to say goodbye to the girls. They all tell their farewells and wishes to see you again soon with knowing and excited looks.

~~~

“You were right, I had so much fun.” You wrap an arm around his elbow as you walk side by side through the streets of New York. The bar isn’t that far from your condo and when he suggested a walk back home you thought it was a good idea to check on the lively corners of the city, even with the heels. Also, he offered his leather jacket against the cold, which you promptly accepted.

“Oh, yeah, nightlife in New York nowadays is something we shouldn’t take for granted,” he smiles down at you, “And yeah, you had fun alright, I know there are a few extra numbers in your phone,” he winks.

You analyze his face and when you understand there’s nothing but playful teasing behind it, you answer, “Oh, yeah, oh my God,” you shake your head, “That was unexpected but fun. I might delete them all, though, things might get complicated and I’m not looking for any kind of complications right now.”

He smiles, seemingly satisfied for you taking him out of the complicated category. “You and the girls seemed to get along real fine, too,” he comments. 

“They’re really great,” you nod, getting cozier in his arm as a gust of wind hits you, “They all think very highly of you, by the way,” you let the smirk in your lips tell him what you mean.

“I work hard for that, sweetheart.” He chuckles and wiggles his eyebrows at you.

You let out a laugh, “That you do.” You look up at him from under your lashes, before whispering, “I can’t wait to see you working hard.”

He halts his pace, making you abruptly stop with him. You shoot him a questioning look, as he gazes down at you, his face lightening up like the best of ideas has just crossed his mind. Without further notice he unwraps his arm from yours and takes your hand instead, pulling you with him at a faster pace as he turns on the corner, changing the course that would lead to your home.

“Hey,” you call out, as you try not to trip on your heels as he pulls you, deflecting from the other patrons and leading the way, “What the hell are you doing?”

He looks back at you with that sinful smile of his, “Don’t wanna leave you waiting.”

Something flips inside your stomach in anticipation at his statement and, as he turns around a few corners, the streets seem to get less busy. When you reach a particular spot, he checks each side, like surveying the area before pulling you to a dark alleyway you haven’t even seen before.

As soon as you out of the street he pins you against the wall and crashes his lips on yours, shoving his leg between yours to keep you in place with the help of the firm grip of his metal hand on your hips.

Like a puppet on his strings you wrap your arms around his neck and respond to the inebriant kiss immediately even if you’re still astonished by it all and when he squeezes one of your tits through the fabric of your dress and his mouth leaves your mouth to drag kisses over your neck, you tilt your head to see the light peeking from the streets, so close to where you’re both standing. 

“Bucky…” a gasp swallows your words for a second as he presses his thigh harder against your pussy, “What the hell, someone can see us,” you remind him, knowing exactly where this will lead if you don’t stop him now. You can already feel the pool of heat in your lower body as he playfully nibbles on your lower lip before going back to your neck.

“Isn’t it exciting, to think someone can spot us while I have my dick inside you.” He licks a long stripe from your neck to behind your ear.

The mention of his dick makes you let out a wanton moan, but you’re not won over yet, “It’s a fucking dark alley in the middle of the night in New York City, Bucky. We will be murdered here.”

At this, all of his enticing movements pause, and he dips his head back with an offended glare at you, “Do I have to remind you who you’re literally fucking with?” he asks, outrage all over his voice, “The Winter Fucking Soldier, White Wolf and shit… the strongest Avenger,” he chant the names and you can’t help but chuckle a bit, “Don’t worry,” leans over to resume from where he stopped, “I can fuck you and protect you at the same time.”

You need no more convincing since that’s actually damn hot and you’re more than sold to the exciting game when he flips you over and kneels down behind you. Listening to your own erratic heartbeats prompted by the electrifying danger of it all, you sprawl your hands on the wall as he sinks his hands under your dress and pulls your underwear down your legs, placing it in his pocket once you step out of it.

He bunches your dress up high enough to give him room and you shudder and sucks in a breath as he props one kiss, then another on the back of each of your thighs, “Try to be quiet…” he says, but swiftly adds, “Not too quiet, though, I love to hear you.”

With that he spreads your legs a little farther and sinks his tongue into the apex of your thighs from behind. Your jaw drops and your knees buckle as he holds your hips still against his face. While his tongue curls around your sensitive pussy your mind blanks and you whimper, trying to suppress a moan, not forgetting you’re right in the open air of New York. Your hips roll against his face, seeking for more friction to untie the knot forming inside you.

But too soon he ceases contact and stands up. You express your disappointment with a whine, face snapping to glare at him behind you.

He’s wearing a smirk on his face as he grabs another condom from his pocket. You wonder how many he has in stash, “You wanted to come on my mouth, didn’t you?” he teases, holding the package between his teeth as he unbuckles his pants.

“Of course,” you shamelessly admit under your breath.

“I know sweetheart… But my dick is aching for you, too,” letting his pants and boxes fall along his legs, he unleashes his hard cock and proceeds on putting on the condom, throwing the plastic package aside, “I was prepping you for it,” he continues, eyes fastened on yours as he speaks, “You want it, don’t you? You want my dick? Come all over it?”

You lick your lips and your gaze falls to look at his rock hard cock, feeling your wetness dripping down your inner thighs. Now that’s an offer you can’t refuse, “Yes, I wanna soak that fucking dick,” you groan, not caring how tacky all the dirty talk may be, since it all sounds sexy as fuck now, clouding all of your senses.

“Shit… take it then, sweetheart.” Guiding his cock with his hand, he pulls your hips and in one single shove he’s inside you.

You let out a silent cry and rest your cheek on your hand against the wall, as the other reaches down to your clit, to help ease down the sumptuous twists inside your core as he pounds into you. 

The sounds and lights of the cars passing by on the street right next to you reminds you how exposed you are and fuck if you’re not gonna come quicker than you ever did as Bucky holds your hips with both of his hands, moving them as fast as he pleases, thrusting them back against his cock. You can feel the fire reaching its peak inside you.

“So fucking wet,” he whispers, breathing hard as he fucks any remaining signs of better judgement out of you and you know it won’t be long for him, either.

You let out a loud moan and it prompts him to pull you pressed against his chest and cover your mouth with his hand, “Shhh.” His hot breath coats your ear and your head falls back on his shoulder as he keeps the delicious pounding of his cock inside you with no hint of mercy.

The damn alley spins around you and you wish you weren’t wearing his leather jacket now as the beads of sweat run down your forehead.

He must’ve heard something in advance because right at that moment a group of people walk by the sidewalk, chatting and laughing. All they have to do is to glance to the side and spot you two in that interesting situation. The danger, the fact that you’re so exposed while Bucky dicks you down against the wall out in the open triggers your orgasm and you let out a strangled sound, muffed by his hand, as the shocks of pleasure washes over your body and weakens your limbs. 

“Shit,” Bucky whispers against your cheeks and his cock pulses inside you, reacting to your cunt squeezing and soaking his cock as you reach your climax.

You wanna feel that again and acting under the influence of a rush of boldness, you reach behind between the two of you and gently massages his bouncing balls. You feel the pulsating of his cock between your walls again and that cheeky move of yours makes him come undone. You only wish that the group is far enough to not hear the reckless and loud moan that slips out of his lips against your ear, his whole body tensing against yours.

As you fight to catch your breath and his hand leaves your mouth to descend to one of your breasts, a long line of courses is recited in your ear before you can feel his body finally relaxing.

Your eyes flutter shut when you sense the brush of his lips on your neck. The next words he breathes against your heated skin makes you beam, loving that he says that while his cock is still buried deep into you, like a damn reward. 

“Congratulations on your promotion, sweetheart.”

~~~


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You have a challenge for Bucky.

The sight meeting your gaze as soon as you step out of your bathroom is one to behold. There is the man himself, laying sprawled and careless across your bed, unashamedly naked while nonchalantly scrolling through his phone, like he hasn’t just now done unspeakable things to you right there.

You take in a contented sigh. How lucky are you to have found a fuck buddy like Bucky? Incredibly hot and handsome, with all those uncountable muscles on his whole body and the most gorgeous face you’ve ever seen. He’s breathtaking to look at and to feel in each sensitive part of your body.

But it’s not just that, that you’re lucky for. His damn personality... So uncomplicated, laid back, straightforwardly honest and, even in all his blatant whoriness, more considerate towards women than any man you’ve ever known, Eddie included. You know about his tragic backstory and you can only wonder the path he had to take to get where he is now.

Apart from the amazing fuck, it’s been so fun to get to spend time with him and get to know the way he thinks, his life philosophy. You’ve found out that relationships don’t have to be complicated, that you don’t need to love or date someone to have a nice time together and that fun and respect can walk hand in hand. Also, something you didn’t know about yourself: that you can be fun and laid back, too.

You can tell Bucky enjoys spending time with you as much as you do with him, you know he’s not faking. The only reason he would have to fake in that situation would be to get you in his bed and he wouldn’t have to, since you got into that deal just exactly for that. Also, he’s too transparent, he has been from the beginning. And with him, you’ve become a fun person in these last few days… or maybe that’s who you were all along and just didn’t know. 

“Enjoying the view, sweetheart?”

In your gawking, you haven’t noticed his cell phone now laying forgotten on the mattress beside him as he tilts his body to the side, facing you, and supports his head on his hand, with that signature smirk of his, completely unbothered by how exposed he is.

In fact, so are you, as you smile and walk back to your bed in all your nakedness, “And what a damn view,” you cheekily say, laying in front of him and mimicking his position. You can’t help but reach over and trace your fingers over the hard muscles of his flesh arm and ripped chest, “I’ve never seen so many muscles gathered in only one person,” you add, completely serious with your admiration.

He chuckles, “Well, that thing they injected in me helped a lot.” 

You don’t have to ask who they are. Every once in a while he mentions his past but it’s always quick and with no sign of heaviness. It does feel like you’ve met him in a new and brighter stage of his life. Your eyes, which have been following the path traced by your fingers, drop to his lower body. Like it usually happens right after you had sex or between the sexy sessions, he’s not as hard as you know he can get, but he’s definitely not completely soft. You’ve been nurturing that curiosity for a while and now you see the opening to bring it up.

“You know, I’ve been wondering,” you start, a little timid and avoiding his eyes, “Did the serum help with… ahm, other things, too?” You glance at him before letting your eyes drop to that particular part of his body, hoping you’ve made yourself clear.

“What do you mean?”

When you look back at him the confusion on his face is poorly feigned and you know he’s messing with you.

“You just want me to say it, don’t you?” You squint your eyes, pulling back your wandering hands from his beefy body, and when he only keeps the faked expression on his face and shrugs, you decide to play along and blurt out, punctuating each word, “Your cock, your fucking marvelous and precious huge cock, Bucky. That’s what I mean.”

You can’t help but grin widely as he lets out a belly laugh, his head falling backwards on the mattress before he comes back to the position on his side facing you with a satisfied and teasing smile on him.

“I’ll tell you what, it didn’t mess up with the size, sweetheart. That’s all good old human biology there, no evil super juice needed.” He bites his lower lip and winks, making you roll your eyes playfully, “But, like you know, I’m always honest and I’m not gonna lie to you. It did pump me up with the…” he pouts and squeezes his eyes, as if looking for the right word, “Performance,” he adds, satisfied with his choice. 

“How so?” You cock an eyebrow, very interested in the information. 

“It basically raised my levels of stamina way higher. I’m always ready to go,” he says like it’s no big deal, “As long as I have motivation, of course. Like such a pretty dame like you,” He gestures towards your naked body with a reverence and winks, prompting a heat to rush up to your cheeks at the old fashioned but still efficient term, which sounds surprisingly sexy coming out of his lips as he says it so naturally while you both lay stark-naked next to each other. 

“Oh…” it slips out of your lips before your forehead creases, “Hold on…You’re telling me that as long as I… ahm… motivate you, or something, you can keep it up, no matter how many times?”

That teasing smugness etches on his face again as he tightens and twists his lips, “Pretty much, yeah,” he answers, bringing a hand to stroke the curve of your hips. 

“Huh,” you let out in a puffed breath as you come to your conclusion, “You’re practically a human dildo.” Your eyes widen as soon as you realize what you just said, “Sorry,” you cringe.

“No offense taken at all,” he chuckles, the corner of his eyes crinkling in that way you find adorably sexy, “I’m actually flattered…” he adds before boring a suspicious gaze into you yours, “I see something glimmering in your eyes, though.”

You bite your lower lip. The mere thought and the teasing hand on your body are enough to rouse your senses and make your entire skin prickle, “Just an idea that crossed my mind,” you answer, voice a little trembling with equal parts of horniness and nervousness in presenting said idea. 

“Ooooo… this sounds exciting. Tell me,” he encourages, putting a bit more pressure on where his hand touches your skin and dragging his body closer to yours. 

“Well…” Your gaze comes across his mouth now that is so closed to yours as you bring your eyes down to follow your fingers dancing over his chest again, brushing over the little whiskers of hair there, “Since we know you can keep it up… ahm…indefinitely,” Your fingers skim lower and lower and his breath hovers yours as a humming sound for you to continue not only touching but talking slips out of his lungs, “It would be interesting to find out how much I can take it, don’t you think?” You lift innocent eyes to his from under your eyelashes. 

A groan rumbles from his chest as his fingers dig into the skin of your hips, with the certainty of leaving marks, “Let me see if I got it straight… You wanna find out how many times you can orgasm in one night?” Like usual, he speaks more directly than you, the lust dark in his gaze. 

“I’m pretty curious… aren’t you?” Your hand wanders down the muscles of his body and follows the path of little hairs, which gets thicker and thicker till you reach his now fully rigid cock.

He brushes his parted lips over yours and lets out a deep exhale as you wrap your fingers around his dick. He’s hard as a rock and twitches in your hand, you’re still amazed that it has reached that point again just by the teasing exchange and little touches.

“Oh yeah, you’re very, very curious, too, I see,” you tease him again, slowly pumping him with your fist. 

“That I am… that I am,” he whispers, his hot and heavy breath hovering yours as his hips ever so lightly starts rocking against your hand. “But, tell me,” he asks putting on some seriousness on his voice, “Would this very obliging sex toy over here be allowed to use not only my fucking marvelous and precious huge cock,” he repeats your words using the same tone as yours, “But also other equally skilled parts of my body, like tongue,” he darts his tongue to lightly lick your upper lip, but quickly retrieves it back to continue speaking, tickling your skin with the tip of his fingers as he drags them from your hips towards your lower belly, “Fingers-”

You suck in a whine, already too turned on to prolong the teasing, “Now it’s definitely not the time to start with rules- ah-” Apparently you aren’t the only one ready to get into the real action as he bats your hand away and swiftly shifts on the bed, rolling over you and between your legs.

When he reaches over the nightstand right next to you, where he already knows is your stash of condoms, you stop him with a hand on his forearm. He looks down at you questioningly as he hovers you supporting himself with his arms on the mattress. 

“You told me before you can’t get sick due the serum. It means you wouldn’t pass me anything, either, right?” You ask, somehow managing to regulate your breathing.

“Yeah, that’s right.” He nods.

“I’m on birth control since forever,” you add, heavily implying what you want from him. 

“Are you sure?” He checks, “I really don’t mind-“

“I wanna fucking feel it. All of it.” You reach between you two and wrap your hand around his bare cock.

“Fuck…” His eyes flutter shut at your touch before snapping open at you, filled with renewed hunger, “You’re in for a ride, sweetheart,” he breathes before grabbing your lips withs his. 

Number four – because he had already graced you with the first three, moments before - happens right there when he pulls your legs up and bend them backwards till your knees straddle your face and takes you hard and raw, because neither of you can wait. Number five he flips you over and keeps you completely still under him, almost crushing you with his delicious weight, having his chest glued to your back as he shoves his hips into yours.

Six and seven happen in a row when he eats you out while you sit on the countertop of your kitchen, after a quick snack and water to regain your forces. Eight, he pounds into you from behind as you grab with sheer force the edges of said countertop…

You have no idea how many hours pass. It happens on your bed, in the kitchen, balcony, table, chairs. In the living room, sofa, carpet, floor, over your desk in your small office… The filthy smells filling up the air of your home along with naughty fluids left on your way. You don’t even dare to think about the cleaning you’ll have to do the next day. Your mind is completely blanked by the constancy of pleasure and sensitivity your body has been sunk into. His cock, lips, tongue, fingers, thigh, hot skin… all of him devoted to you, to your desire, as his body merges into yours turning you into a blur of bliss.

When you become just a sack of numb limbs and dizziness, he scoops you up from the living room carpet and rests you on your bed, bringing you water right before laying behind you, forming a breathless spoon on the mattress. He might be thinking you’re finally done, but if that’s the case, he’s miscalculating the effect the heat of his body against yours has on you. So, after you roll your hips against his cock – which hardens almost immediately- he lifts your leg and eases himself inside your poor, but still somehow ready and eager, cunt. Knowing how overstimulated you are, he reaches over you and just ever so lightly brushes a finger over your clit. That’s how you reach the 24th orgasm of the night and, at last, throw the towel.

“That was… something,” you say when you’re in the shower with him after a deserved, but quick nap, still in your sticky and fervent skins. When you announced you needed a shower, he joined you promptly, “I thought I would reach 15, 16 at most. I’m pretty impressed with you.”

He clicks his tongue, while pouring some of your shampoo on his hand, “Nah… you’re just underestimating you, sweetheart.” He puts the shampoo on his hair and brushes the locks with his fingers, “I, on the other hand, know exactly what kind of insatiable minx you are,” he says right before sinking his head under the shower to rinse his hair. 

Under the water he doesn’t see your jaw dropping and your outraged gasp, but he certainly feels the little shove on his chest to express your protests, because he takes his head out of the water and brushes the water out of his face with his hand, “What?”

“Fucking rude,” you answer, already laughing quietly, while using the sponge to leather your body. 

“Ok, I could’ve used better words, but I didn’t mean it like that,” he says, “But I get it. It’s been almost 80 years and somethings haven’t changed that much.” He twists his lips, reaching over for the hair conditioning, “I know women grow up listening to this fucking culture who teach men and women that enjoying sex is a guy thing… and when a woman shows the opposite she’s judged, which is stupid. The issue is pure fucked up sociology rather than biology. A man needs a damn super serum to reach that many orgasms in one night while all women need is their own body and will. It’s lame what society can do when it comes to repressing women.” He shrugs. 

Once again your jaw drops, but for an entirely different reason, and for a while you just watch him, dumbfounded, while he hums a tune, applying conditioner on his long locks and dives his head on the running water again, like he hasn’t just now slapped your face with a damn feminist discourse about female sexuality, “That’s… true…” You have no choice but to agree.

“Of course it is…” he smirks proudly, before squinting his eyes at you while you wash out the soap of your body, “And you know what? I bet you have one more there waiting for me,” he lifts his chin, like he’s challenging you, as water drips from his face and hair. 

Your eyes widen for a second at the implications of said challenge, “I can’t.” You’re quick to shake your head. You have no idea how you’re managing to stand there, since every little muscle of your body is sore.

“Actually, I bet you have one more there waiting for you… Wanna see?” He cocks an eyebrow.

“Shit, Bucky, I don’t think I can handle you one more time,” you reply, honestly. As tempting as the idea sounds, you can’t even think about taking him again.

“Don’t worry… I won’t be doing anything.” His voice lowers a tone, as he walks you back towards the shower seat Eddie was so adamant in adding to the bathroom.

Looking down, you’re not surprised at all to see his cock already hardening and you would be lying to yourself if you don’t feel a little tingle in your belly. As soon as you’re seated, he props his metal arm on the wall above your head and wraps his flesh hand on his cock, which is inches from you, bumping it a few times till it’s quickly fully hard.

“Tonight was an interesting experience for me, too,” his voice, laced with silk and mischief, props your gaze to lift to his. As he stares down at you and his hand jerks on his cock, locks of wet hair fall on his face and droplets run down his naked body.

It’s only instinct when your tongue darts out to lick your lips. You can’t believe you’re already getting turned on after everything you’ve already done, “Yeah, how so?” You encourage him in whatever treat he has planned for you.

“Hmmm,” his eyes flutter shut for a second as he swipes his thumb over the rosy tip, keeping a slow pace on himself, “Getting to know your body even more… the little places I touch and your whole body trembles, yeah… open up for me, that’s it, that damn pussy of yours,” he coos when you prop one heel over the bench beside you, letting the other on the floor and allowing your fingers to dance over your breasts and skim down your wet body.

“What else…ha,” you gasp when your exploring fingers reach your clit. It’s still sensitive from the previous actions, but it doesn’t reject your touch as the water from the shower mixes up with your natural wetness. It’s not hard to feel your arousal rising again in your body, not when you have that obscene sight of him touching himself inches from you and that dirty mouth saying all the things he likes about having sex with you. Your body responds to the sensuous scenario instantly. 

“I lose my mind at how that pussy squeezes my cock when I talk dirty to you… These fucking tits of yours,” he groans and you can see his cock twitching.

Your hand on yourself speeds up in rhythm with his, but it remains a light touch on your clit, the kind of touch your body is asking for right now, but it feels good, so damn good, like a feather tickling the sensitive nub. Your eyes are stuck on his as much as his is stuck on yours. You feel like the sexiest woman alive under his gaze and fuck if you’re not gonna reach your 25th orgasm of the night soon. 

“I wanna have my cock between them one day, would you do that for me, beautiful, fuck my cock with your perfect tits?” He continues his verbal fucking, biting his lip till the blood rushes out of his skin, “Fucking you is an experience I can’t seem to get enough, sweetie, what about you, huh? Tell me what you like about fucking me.”

So many things… “I-I like your fucking big cock,” you say before letting out a small laugh, “Obviously,” you wiggle your eyebrows making him laugh briefly with you, before you look down at where he’s jerking himself. You have no idea how you’re managing to talk like that, you’ve never been that verbal when it comes to sex, but with him… it’s different. “It’s so damn thick…” You lick your lips, breathing hard as the feather touch in your clit sparks laces of pleasure inside you. Looking up at him, you see him clenching his teeth, hooded eyes still on you, “I like when you’re rough to me, when you throw me around like I weigh nothing, you’re so fucking strong, ah.” Your head falls back as you’re almost there… “I like that you know exactly what gives me pleasure, even before I know it myself…”

“Fuck, you’re damn sexy…” he breathes out and you can tell he’s holding himself back, probably waiting for you to finish before he does, “What about that ass of mine, huh?” The playfulness comes back to his voice between harsh panting.

You chuckle, “I fucking love grabbing it while you’re pounding your dick inside me and… oh, God… that fucking filthy mouth… Especially when it’s all over me.” Your toes curl as the pressure inside your core tightens, driving yourself closer and closer to the edge, the words come out of your lips like they have a mind of their own, connected solely to your desire, “I love how you love eating me out, oh, goddamn, fuck…” Your eyes shut and your body shakes as you close your legs around your hand, reaching an orgasm for 25th time that night, this time by your own hand. And is just as good and powerful as the others he has given you.

“Shit,” his voice falters and as you still struggle to breathe you look up at him, “Can I come on those tits, sweetheart?” He nods towards your body, his voice coming out tight from between his teeth.

“Fuck yeah,” You nod, arching your back and exposing your breasts even more to him. 

“Holy shit,” he moans as, after a few more expert bumps, he spills his climax all over your chest, “Fuck,” he keeps his metal hand on the wall as he stares down apparently in a spell, admiring his handiwork, before grabbing your arm and making you stand, pulling you to him and grabbing your breathless lips in a kiss. 

Your chest is tight against his and the thought of the mess between you two makes you moan through his kiss. He’s the one who pulls back with that signature smugness all over his face.

Your eyes roll playfully, “Yeah, I know… You told me so…”

~~~

After you finish the shower for real this time, you’re drying yourself with a towel while Bucky, already with his black boxes on, uses one of your combs to work on his hair in front of the mirror in your bathroom. He huffs in frustration as the long locks don’t seem to stay in the style he’s looking for.

The sound of your quiet laugh makes him glance towards you. He smiles tightly and shrugs, a whole new sheepish expression on his face, “I’ve been meaning to cut it, but… I don’t know… other stuff keeps getting in the way,” he shrugs again, turning back to the mirror.

“I like it that way, it suits you pretty well, but if you’d liked I could cut it for you?” you offer, lacing your towel with a knot around your body.

“Really?” He tilts his head while something like amused skepticism etches on his face.

“Yeah, sure, I have all the tools here now if that’s something you want.”

He looks at himself in the mirror, taking a good look at his locks before turning back to you, “Let’s do this.”

Next thing you know you have Bucky still only in his boxes sitting on a chair he carried to your bathroom while you’re on an old t-shirt, displaying the set of shears, combs and trimmer over the countertop.

Wrapping a towel around his shoulders, you look at his reflection on the mirror, “So, are we just cutting the ends or are you going overboard here?”

“Overboard,” he answers right away and you smile at the trust he lays on you, “But leave something to grab. You all seem to love that.” The corner of his lips twists.

You laugh, reaching for the shear, “We all love it indeed,” you agree and run your hands over his locks, analyzing what you’re dealing with, “Trust me, I know exactly what to do.” You wink at him through the mirror and get on to work.

“Haircuts, huh?” he asks as the little strands of hair fall over the towel and the floor, “Quite an arsenal you have here.” He nods at your tools in front of him.

“Yeah,” you don’t move the focus from your working hands to answer, “I used to cut Eddie’s. We’ve been on a low budget for years so we could buy this place.” You give him a brief tight-lip glance.

“Very nice place, by the way.”

“It is, isn’t it?” You beam at him before focusing back on his hair, “But it’s a bit strange, actually. When we found it and moved in, I thought I would spend the rest of my life here with him… And now…” you sigh.

“Now we’re ruining your furniture,” he beams when you look at him.

You can’t help chuckle and agree, “Pretty much, yeah.”

“Are you keeping it?”

Your lips tightens as you look down at your working hands… You haven’t really thought of it straight and you’re sure that not thinking about it means you still had some hope to resume your life from where it had stopped when Eddie broke up with you. But, now that you’re talking about it, the answer feels right when it rolls off your tongue, “I want to. I love this place…with my promotion and the money that comes with it, I think I could make it happen, but… I still need to work things out with Eddie, though.”

“You haven’t talked to him yet.” Bucky affirms rather than ask. All along, even when you’re not looking at him at times, you can feel Bucky’s gaze not leaving your reflection in the mirror as his hair goes through a transformation by your hands.

“No.” You shake your head and decide to share with him an idea that has been wandering in your mind lately, “Stark mentioned a party to celebrate my promotion-“

“Of course…” He adds.

“Yeah…” You laugh, before clearing your throat, “I was thinking about calling Eddie, letting him know I was promoted… I mean… we went to collage together and went through our careers together…” You look back at him through the mirror, “I think he’ll be happy to know from me and maybe even go to the party to celebrate. Also, we’ll be working a lot with each other again since he’s the leader of Shield’s team.”

“Were you still together when he got his promotion?” He asks, genuine interest in his voice.

You shake your head no, “It was right after he broke up with me.”

“If you don’t mind me asking, what happened?”

“I don’t know, actually, “ you answer, going back on working with the shears, finding a bit funny how he’s been fucking you senseless and exploring every little inch of your body these last few days and still is careful in asking a personal question, “I noticed he was distant a few weeks before, but I brushed it off.” You shrug, “We’d been together for so long and we had our ups and downs… I just thought we were going through one of our downs. And then he woke up one day and said he didn’t want to be together anymore… Natasha thinks he has someone else,” you say, with a small and humorless laugh as you turn on the blow drier and positions it over his hair.

He tightens his lips through the reflection. Yeah… he thinks the same. 

You’re glad for the sound of the drier as silence settles between you two. It’s not awkward or anything like that… you’re just glad for the silence so you can evaluate how the possibility of Eddie having someone affects you. It’s fucked up to admit even to yourself, but it sucks. It’s not like you’re crying alone right now, but it’s different. There’s nothing romantic with Bucky and, honestly, you feel like shit picturing Eddie, your boyfriend of ten years, in a relationship with someone else. 

“Did he call you to let you know once he was promoted?” Bucky asks as soon as you turn off the drier.

“He didn’t. I sent him a text when I found out, he didn’t answer,” You bite your cheek, as your shoulders drop and you slowly comb his hair.

“It sucks, huh?” He twists his lips as you meet his eyes through the mirror. They’re full of kindness and understanding, and you’re glad he doesn’t make you feel more embarrassed than you naturally are in sharing that with him. 

“We had just split, though… now it’s been months… things should be a little less weird… and voi lá.” Thankfully for your embarrassment, you finish his hair right then, an opportunity to change the subject.

He takes his eyes from you to his reflection on the mirror and you bite your lip waiting for his reaction, since it feels like it’s the first time he’s paying attention to himself ever since you started cutting his hair. Like he asked, you went overboard and cut it a lot shorter than before, letting a fluffy quaff on the top. As much as you loved the long locks, you think he looks more handsome than ever, like a movie star.

“Oh, wow”, he lets out in a jovial voice, running his hand over his soft and shorter locks, “It’s awesome.”

“Really?” you smile, letting out a relief breath, “See?” You grab the fluffiness on top of his head and smirk, “Perfect to grab.”

He laughs, “I really like it, I don’t look homeless anymore. Thank you.” He nods.

“You’re welcome, but wait, there are still some final touches before we’re really finished.” You grab the trimmer, and turn it on to work on the outlines behind his neck.

“Alright, ma’am.” He promptly straightens up his posture as you go back to work, “So, is it important for you that he knows?”

He resumes from where you had stopped and doesn’t have to clarify who and what he’s talking about. “It’s important for me that he goes,” you admit with a sigh, turning off the trimmer and looking at him through the mirror. You run your hands once again through his soft and new hair, before grabbing a little brush, “It feels weird to not share this with him,” you mutter, using the tool to meticulously brush off the remains of hair on his neck and shoulders. 

“Ok, then you should call him, why not?” He shrugs, “It’s been ten years, you just don’t erase that.”

A small, but thankful, smile curls your lips. You could expect being scolded for admitting something like that. Not from Bucky, apparently. And his support is really significant at that moment, much more than any lecture one of your friends would give you about the troubles of calling an ex-boyfriend who broke up with you.

“But just so you know,” he continues, shutting his eyes for a second and letting out a long exhale, “It may be just me, but I don’t think a man who doesn’t like to eat pussy deserves any kind of consideration.”

You laugh, letting your head fall back, before shaking it in lighthearted disbelief.

Bucky smiles and, if the fact that he makes you laugh with his stupid jokes lights up a warm and mysterious sensation in his chest, he thinks nothing of it, concentrating only on the touch of your gentle fingers grazing the skin of his neck while you go back to cleaning the little hairs off him.

~~~

Next chapter (from Bucky’s pov) coming soon.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Movie nights are the best.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for taking this long to post this one. Life... I hope you all like it. Send me a comment if you do!!! it gives me life, seriously!

Your breathing is heavy. 

The silky slide of his tongue makes you moan, deep, and you dig your nails on his scalp, pulling his hair even harder. He groans and the vibrations hit your core. He was right the other day, you love grabbing his hair, especially when you’re on his bed and his head is between your legs first thing in the morning.

No, you haven’t slept there that night. It would be your first day in your new job position and you thought it would be best to have a good and uneventful night of sleep, free of any action that could keep you up. But the thing with good nights of sleep is they’re actually not as relaxing as Bucky Barnes’s sweet tongue and you decided you needed it before you started the day.

Good thing he lives where you work and he didn’t turn you down when you called him at that ungodly hour. That’s how you end up there, at the verge of a morning orgasm, your skirt and underwear tossed somewhere in his bedroom and you only wearing your heels and your white blouse while he’s eating you out on his bed, butt-naked, because that’s just how he sleeps every night. 

“Oh, fucking shitballs,” you curse when he closes his lips around your clit. The throbbing little nub is swollen and aching for a release. 

He chuckles against your sensitive and wet pussy, pulling you harder against his face, deepening his fingers on your thighs. Deeply focused on his task, he flattens his tongue and laps at you.

The change of movements doesn’t go unnoticed by you, who cries out at the waves of pleasure rushing up your body. A few more talented strokes of his tongue and you lose it. You moan a loud chant of courses and your back arches as your shivering legs shut around his head and your heels cross over his back.

That’s when a huge bang breaks into your dreamy state and makes you shout and jump on the bed, your face snapping towards the loud sound.

“I fucking knew it.”

Natasha’s voice isn’t one you were expecting to hear at that moment, and it takes you a moment to understand what is happening. There is your friend, in full tactical gear, arms smugly crossed in front of her body while she stands by the door she has just kicked opened. It takes you an even longer moment to remember the position you’re in. You look down to see Bucky, smirking, peeking at her from between your thighs, his face glistening with your juices all around it.

“What the hell?” You shout, finally releasing him from the clasp of your legs and pulling the first piece of fabric you find on his bed over your exposed lower half as you swiftly drag yourself away from him.

“Does Fury need me again?” Bucky asks, completely unbothered by Nat’s presence or his nakedness… or his extremely evident hard on, you notice, when he stands up from the spot he was bent down, before jumping to lay down beside you.

Something tells you this isn’t a one-time occurrence, but it doesn’t change the fact that is happening to you and how hot your cheeks are from sheer embarrassment in getting caught in such a situation.

“Nice hair, stud,” she comments, gaining a smug expression in response, before continuing, “He needs her, actually. Congratulations on your promotion, by the way,” Natasha smirks, pointing at you and your heart rushes up to beat against your throat at the mention of Fury’s name.

“What? Holy fuck,” you curse, wrapping the sheet around you before flying out of the bed and moving to pick up your pieces of clothes tossed by the floor.

“Told you she would be here, Steve,” Natasha tilts her head to behind her shoulder. 

A low, strangled grunt comes from the living room.

That makes you halt at once as you bend down to pick your underwear. Incredibly widened eyes snap at Natasha. As your cheeks burn hotter than ever, she covers her mouth with the back of her hand, obviously holding back a mischievous laugh.

“Hey, Punk,” Bucky shouts from the bed.

“You should’ve seen his face at fucking, shitballs.” Nat bursts out in uncontained laughs, followed shortly by Bucky. 

You can’t believe it. Captain Fucking America is waiting on the next room as you pick up your clothes after he heard the mind-blowing orgasm given by his friend to you on your first day on your new job - one that will require that you’d meet with the Avenger often - and you’re as mortified as you’d ever be. You know Nat enough to know she doesn’t mean any harm by it all, and you’ll know that eventually you will laugh with her about that moment, but eventually it’s definitely not now and she’s obviously having too much fun with your misery, so a little wish for vengeance burns up inside you.

“She told me you gave her the best orgasm of her life,” you blurt out, looking at Bucky, but the underwear in your hands at her. You bolt to the bathroom right after, locking the door behind you, but not before glimpsing the outraged expression on her face.

“You damn traitor,” Natasha yells, as you rush to put yourself together inside the bathroom.

“Well, looks like we’re a good pair,” you yell back.

“Calm down, ladies…” Bucky says and you can hear the amusement in his voice, as you work to freshen up, “Don’t worry, Steve would die before acknowledge this ever happened,” he raises his voice for you to hear, as an evident attempt to soothe you, but you can’t say it’s as effective as he would expect. “And you,” you guess he’s speaking to Natasha, “like I didn’t know that already. You were very vocal at the time and seemed like you’d forgotten I understand Russian perfectly.”

As put together as you can be in that situation, dying to bolt away and having Fury waiting for your ass, you open the bathroom’s door soon enough to see Nat flipping Bucky off as he cheekily winks at her.

“Ok.” You tap your hands down your skirt to straighten the little wrinkles on the fabric, “How do I look?” you ask Natasha. The formal outfit is way different from your usual jeans and sneakers, but it’s your first day in a very important position. Dress to impress felt like the right choice. 

“Stunning.” The answer comes from both Nat and Bucky and you can only let yourself soften as they smile at each other, a clear sign of peace.

“Alright,” you nod, walking to grab your purse on the armchair next to his bed, “Ahm… thank you, Bucky,” you seriously don’t know what else you can say to him at that moment.

“Anytime, sweetheart, you know that,” he makes a reverence, before linking his hands behind his head with a very pleased tug on the corner of his lips.

You clear your throat, trying to not indulge him in a less than perfect circumstances, before turning to a too amused Natasha. 

“See you tonight?” she asks, tilting her head.

“Yeah, of course,” you sigh, all the annoyance completely gone, “Welcome back, talk to you later.” You say goodbye by placing a kiss on her cheeks.

As you rush across the living room and towards the way out, Captain Fucking America looks absolutely guilty and red as the stripes on his uniform, “I told her not to, but-“

“I know,” you sure do know how determined Natasha Romanoff can be, “Can we please never talk about it again?”

“Gladly,” he quickly answers, looking as relieved as you before you bolt out of Bucky’s apartment.

~~~

His cell phone buzzes in his pocket and he picks it up as the elevator runs up to the common floor. He’s dying for one of Wanda’s cookies, which she usually bakes at this hour for everyone. Unlocking the screen he sees the text. It’s from Olivia, asking if he has plans for that night, with a winkie emoji at the end. Emojis… he loves them, one of the best things from the future.

He’s about to type the answer when the elevator doors open and he hears the sound of a movie playing loudly in the TV room. Oh, so there’s one of those movie night things going… the cookies will definitely be there.

He quickly steps towards the sound and opens the door to the dark room, meeting a few squinting expressions at the light that shines from behind him. As soon as he finds one particular scrunched face among the other ones his lips curl in a smirk and, before putting his phone back in his pocket, he types a quick reply saying he’s already got plans, the same answer he’s given to every other message he’s received those last few weeks that wasn’t from the woman greeting him with a small and discreet smile right now.

“So soon at home?” Natasha asks, munching a mouthful of popcorn. Along with her in the room are Sam, seating next to her on one of the sofas, Steve and Sharon sharing an armchair and a bowl of popcorn, Wanda laying on some big cushions on the floor, eating one of her cookies while she, the face that got his attention and instant interest, is comfortably seating all by herself on a big and inviting sofa, cozily tucked under a blanket.

“Didn’t even go out,” Bucky shrugs, “Movie night, huh?” He peeks in, averting his gaze from her to the big screen, “And one of my favorite movies I see..” he says, having absolutely no idea which movie that is and why there’s a creepy guy talking to a ball in the middle of an island. 

“In or out, dude,” Sam throws some popcorn on him, “Shut the damn door.”

“Alright, alright,” Bucky does as he says, not even engaging with Sam’s teasing. He has other things occupying his mind.

And said “other things” eyes him suspiciously as he walks towards the sofa she’s been occupying alone. He doesn’t say anything before throwing himself on the cushions, right next to her, despite all the space left. He can feel everyone’s eyes, maybe except Sam’s, lingering on him for a little too long, but it doesn’t bother him at all as he makes himself comfortable, reaching over to grab a cookie from the plate on the small table in front of him.

“Hi,” he whispers, turning to face her. 

“Hi,” she answers back with a small smile, before focusing on the movie again. 

“You don’t mind do you?” Bucky once again whispers, pulling the end of her blanket while he munches the cookie.

She eyes him for a moment and he has to hold back a laugh. She has to know where he’s going with this and if that time they’ve spent together because of their deal made him get to know her at least a bit, he bets she’ll play along with him. 

“No?” her answer comes out on a wary whisper and he doesn’t waste a second before sinking beneath her blanket, dragging himself a bit closer to her.

When he’s cozy enough, he turns to the movie again, pretending to be paying attention to the screen while she does the same. He knows it’s all a façade and she’s waiting to find out what he’s up to. He loves it. It’s only after several minutes – teasing her is always good fun – that his hand under the blanket casually navigates through the cushions and rests on her thigh.

As soon as his hand touches her skin, he senses the flinch of her body. While he shoves the last piece of cookie in his mouth, with the corner of his eyes, he catches when she glances not at him, but at the rest of the group in the room. The fact she doesn’t bat his hand right away, encourages him to give her thigh a pointed squeeze and that’s when she shoots him a warning glare. Which he ignores, of course, in favor of letting his hand snake up her smooth skin. The small hitch of her breath doesn’t go unnoticed by him. 

He smiles to find out she’s wearing a skirt.

When his hand moves down to the soft inner part of her thigh, she shuts her legs, trapping it in place. He doesn’t look at her while he just waits… all he has to do is to wait. He can tell she’s a bit nervous as he feels her eyes on him before they turn to the others, but a light and sweet scent, which is now very familiar, teases his nostrils, ever so lightly, and he knows she’s more than up to that little game. He hopes for the other super soldier in the room to be focused enough on his girl next to him so he doesn’t catch the faint scent in the air.

He waits.

The confirmation of her true disposition comes when she slowly opens her legs and shifts on the sofa, lifting one knee up so the blanket makes a tent, making it hard for anyone to spot where his hand really lays beneath the blanket.

Bucky is then more than happy to resume his ascend until he cups her mound through the cotton of her underwear. He keeps his touch light, barely brushing her mound, noticing a little wetness pulling at the fabric and smirking. But what makes him almost lose his shit is to find out how impatiently up to his game she actually is, when she dips her hand under the blanket and guides his hand beneath the cotton, letting his fingers rest on her clit before she removes her hand.

Goddamit, he has to hold back to not let a loud moan both at her initiative and the warm and smooth feeling on his fingers. He can’t believe how lucky he is to be spending this time and sharing moments like this with her. He has to admit that this deal he has set with her is the best thing that has happened to him in a while. Yes, he has a great deal of women he can call his friends and has been spending time with. But with her…

Bucky’s sure he has found his partner in crime.

He’s aware of the long time she’s been in a relationship and he knows the ending wasn’t that great. But in spite of that, she trusts him completely to make her feel good and not hurt her in any way, and he loves that he can do that… Make her feel good.

He starts caressing her clit, noticing how her body responds, a tiny hitch on her breathing, her lower lip between her teeth… He doesn’t want to make her wait much longer, seeing how eager she definitely is. Another thing he adores about her… she’s always up to go a bit further with him, to break some limits. He would never do anything she’s not comfortable with, but it’s addicting her willingness for more, to go beyond herself to reach the goal or finding pleasure and a good time.

Truly a partner in crime.

Her gaze remains on the screen while he fingers her under the blanket, but he can hear a particularly louder sigh as her head falls back on the sofa.

Bucky looks around but no one seems to have noticed anything, paying attention to whatever is happening in the movie. Discreetly, he grabs a small pillow from the sofa and places it over his lap to hide how much the mission to drive her to the edge and the wetness gathering around his fingers under the blanket are affecting him.

He has learned the way her body works enough to know she’s almost there. Also, he knows she has a thing for exposed and dangerous situations like that, the thrilling possibility of getting caught, the filthy actions in an otherwise innocent situation… Fuck if his cock isn’t aching for some attention, too…If had his way he would bent her over that couch and take her right then and there, to hell with everyone else.

Glancing at her, he spots the clenched jaw and fluttering eyelids. She comes all over his fingers without making a single noise and, damn, she turns him on so much. 

After a few more strokes to ease her down, he pulls his fingers away and, as she watches him from the corner of her eyes, he brings them to his lips, licking them deliciously as he stares at the movie. Her sweet taste makes him painfully hard beneath his jeans and that’s when she surprises him by throwing the blanket to the side and swiftly getting up.

“Are you ok?” Nat asks as all the faces snap to the woman standing up.

“Yeah, sure. Just need to go to the bathroom. No need to pause the movie, I’ll be quick,” she answers, but she doesn’t leave the room without glancing at Bucky with a small tug on the corner of her lips.

His cock twitches at it… That’s his cue, right? It has to be, or else he’ll explode right then and there. He waits a few minutes for good measure before pulling his phone from the pocket. He pretends to be reading something on the screen before clicking his tongue, “Got to go. That was fun, though, let’s do it again sometime.”

Bucky’s damn sure Natasha not for a second buys the excuse as she shoots him a knowing smirk, but the others seem to at least don’t care about him leaving - suspiciously right after her- only mumbling their goodbyes as their attention remains in the movie.

When he opens the door to the bathroom, which is only a few feet away from the tv room, he’s greeted with a pair of lips crashing against his. Responding right away to the kiss, he kicks the door shut behind him and wraps his arms around her as he relishes the feel of her hands exploring his whole body, grabbing his muscles and flesh. Good, she’s as excited as him.

“That was fucking hot,” she says through the kiss, pulling a handful of his hair.

“Agreed,” he pants, not parting his lips from hers, “Check out how happy I was to find you here,” he grabs her hand and places it over his throbbing hard on.

She chuckles as he walks her backwards to the counter, “I’m glad I accepted Nat’s invitation to see a movie with her after dinner, then,” she pulls away just enough to say that before launching back on him, making him moan as she palms him through his jeans. “We need to do something about it, now,” she teases, parting her lips from his to drag them down his neck, adding a bit more of pressure on his cock.

“Damn straight,” he manages to say, as her mouth and her hands on him make him light in the head. Desperate to feel her, he grabs her by the waist and places her on the countertop and positions himself between her legs, reaching down to unbutton his jeans, “How was your first day as the boss?” Just the thought is enough to make his cock twitch inside the annoying confines of his pants.

“Fucking fantastic,” she answers putting a stopping hand on his chest and grabbing the one on his jeans by the pulse.

“Hey,” an embarrassing whine slips out of his lips.

“Nah-ah,” she smirks in such a mischievous way that the sight alone could result in him making a mess of his pants if he didn’t focus, “I’ve got my own tricks, too, you know?” she coos, pushing him a bit backwards before sliding down from the counter and sinking to her knees right in front of him.

Oh…

Since she just ended the possibility of any coherent thought to be formed on his mind, all there’s left for him is to let his arms fall limp on each side of his body and watch her, dumbfounded and horny as ever, as she nuzzless his dick through the jeans and swiftly work on his buttons and zipper.

His cock bobs in front of her as she pulls down his pants and underwear just enough to expose it to her. Bucky is entranced by the sight of her licking her lips before leaning over and slowly sliding her flattened tongue over the length of the prominent vein on the underside of his cock. Then his tip is engulfed by the wet and soft heat of her mouth and a strangled yet loud noise slips out of his lungs as his eyelids flutter.

“Be quiet, sweetheart,” she pulls back, making him already miss her lips around his dick. He looks down at her and she shoots a cheeky wink at him, wrapping her hand around the base and peppering sweet, torturous kisses over his length and head, smearing the leaking precum over her lips before wrapping them around him again.

Bucky is in a complete daze as she works her lips and tongue beautifully on him, producing sloppy and enticing sounds. Surprisingly enough, after trying a lot of stuff together, that particular act hadn’t happened yet and goddammit why the hell had he waited for so long? Maybe because he’s been focusing completely on her pleasure, which can’t be considered an unselfish act at all, since giving her pleasure is insanely hot, making him get off on that easily. But, man… that woman knows what she’s doing and it’s driving him completely nuts right now.

Especially as she keeps jerking him with her hand while her lips adventures down his sack. All he sees is the top of her head moving as she is shamelessly licking and sucking his balls, the slurping sounds of her mouth on him makes his cock jerk in her hand. Bucky can’t hold back the moans and his hands grip tightly the counter before him, the blood rushing away from his fingers with the force he uses.

Her lips come back to suck on his dick, hollowing her cheeks as her other hand grabs a handful of his butt. She squeezes the flesh harshly and grunts around his dick.

“Fuck,” Bucky lets out in a breathless whisper, barely holding together as the vibrations reverberates through his pulsing cock, wrapped in her heat. He’s not gonna last long, he knows that.

With a pop, she releases his cock from her mouth, but keeps her hand wrapped and moving up and down his length. Bucky would’ve protested if he could form one coherent word, “Bucky,” she purrs, brushing her cheek on his cock, as if she’s worshiping it. He feels himself tighter and tighter, rushing to the edge, and that sight is no help for him trying to hold back and prolong the little heaven he’s in, “I want you to fuck my mouth, Bucky.” 

That’s it. He always knew that after more than one hundred years he would die in a situation like that, “What?” he breathes out and it sounds like a groan as he clenches his teeth.

“I want you to fuck my face and I want to taste you, all of you, understand?” Her words sound more like a command as she looks up at him and lazily fists his cock, coated in her saliva.

“Copy that, ma’am,” he quickly obeys, capturing his lower lip in a tight bite, “But if it’s too much you have to let me know, ok? Stop me, punch me in the stomach, if you have to.” As desperate as he is to do as she wants and fuck that pretty little face of hers, the last thing he wants is to hurt her in any way. But they’ve been pretty comfortable with each other to let the other know exactly what they want to do or not, so he doesn’t have to worry much about it.

She smirks and nods before brushing the tip of her tongue over the tip of his cock.

Fuck… she’s perfect.

More than happy to comply with her command, Bucky grips the hair on the back of her head as she invitingly opens her mouth to welcome him, letting her hands rest on her thighs.

He pushes back inside her. He goes slow at first, but goes deep, testing her limits. His breath hitches as he watches his cock disappearing inside her mouth, and oh, man… his head reaches her throat and he hears a strangled moan out of her as she chokes lightly on it…

He fucking loses it.

Bucky does exactly what she asked for and fucks her mouth, holding her face steady with one hand on her hair as with the other he grips the counter as he thrusts inside her, moving her head as he pleases, guiding himself by the muffled but sweet sounds she makes along with him. He goes deep, fast…

He locks eyes with her and sees the sheer lust on them as her swollen lips take his cock, saliva sliding down her chin, “Take that cock, sweetheart. You look fucking beautiful taking it like that.”

The fluttering of her eyes at his words is what takes him on the edge of his climax, “Fuck, I’m gonna cum,” he warns, his voice a strange rasped sound in his ears, “You want that, don’t you? You want my fucking cum deep down your throat, right, beautiful?”

Her answer is to bring both hands to grip harshly his butt and pull him even deeper into her. The tightness coiling inside him is too much before he reaches the best damn orgasm of his life.

A dangerously loud grunt of him resounds around the small bathroom as he spills his climax deep down her mouth and throat, just like he’s promised. The world around him dissolves into the image of her swallowing around him, taking all of him. He’s body falls a bit forward and he has to tighten the hold on the counter as fingers tangle around her locks.

He remains under the effect of the powerful and insanely pleasurable sensation, the aftershocks jerking his body and turning his mind into a total blankness as she slowly and gently sucks and licks him clean, making little humming sounds that only add to his utter state of bliss.

When he feels his strength rushing back to his limbs again, he moves his hand from her hair and helps her up by the arm and without thinking twice slams his lips to hers. 

Her inherent sweetness immediately mixes with his own taste, invading his senses and damn if he doesn’t wanna feel that again and again and again… He swirls his tongue around hers, loving how her arms curl around his neck, like they usually do when he kisses her.

Bucky doesn’t notice he’s been prolonging the kiss for maybe a little too long and maybe a little too intensely until she lets out a muffled giggle through his lips and taps lightly on his shoulder.

He parts away immediately, but doesn’t completely let her go, keeping her close by the waist, only then realizing how breathless he is. Both of them, actually as he notices how deep and fast the up and down of her chest is. But she’s smiling… and that alone makes Bucky smile, too.

She looks thoroughly fucked. Her hair is a complete mess, eyes a bit reddened and teary while her lips are swollen tinted in a darker shade and from taking his cock that hard. He simply can’t move his gaze away while she holds the smile, looking… content…happy…

Right there, just like that, completely undone and disheveled, she’s the most beautiful thing he has ever seen.

He’s not even thinking straight yet when he reaches over and cups her cheek. Spotting a drop of his own pleasure that slipped from the corner of her mouth, he swipes it with his thumb and brings it to her lips, entranced by the way she welcomes it right away, swirling her tongue around his finger before sucking it inside her mouth while her eyes are stuck on his.

His heart skips a beat at the sight. There’s an urge rising in him. A whole new kind of urge he hasn’t ever felt before and he can’t pinpoint exactly what that desperate need is for while she lets go of his thumb before placing a kiss on it and moves her back to him, to face the mirror and put herself together, depriving his arms from her warmth.

He just can’t take his eyes off of her and all he wants is to grab her back and hold her close to him, to feel her skin, smell the sweet scent of her shampoo, listen to her sweet voice in his ears telling him all about her day while she softly runs her fingers through his hair…

Wait… he forces himself to interrupt his own weird line of thoughts.

What the hell is happening?

~~~

Chapter 6 coming soon.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I didn't answer the comments on the previous chapter, yet, I've read them, will do it soon and love you all.

Bucky takes a sip from the whiskey in his hand and, for a glimpse of a moment, he thinks of the time he would absolutely hate the scenario around him right now, crowded with people of all imaginable sorts, loud chattering and music, dance floors flashing with bright and colorful lights. A party, but not just a party, a Tony Stark Party, filled with all of that and also the best food in the country and even better drinks. He used to loath them, until he freed himself from his own mind restraints and remembered what a party really was: an opportunity to let yourself lose, follow no rules except to have fun and, of course, meet some nice people, especially women – lots of them- to spend time with… in his bed. 

What had never crossed his mind, though, is that would come a day when he would be interested in meeting just one. And he holds his gaze on her right now. She’s there, among the sea of bodies, sipping from her drink while laughing and talking with her friends, Nat and Sharon.

Bucky can’t help the smile forming on his lips at the sight of her having her fun. As she should be…that party is all for her, after all. She looks beautiful, as usual, in a shimmery short dress and heels high enough to make a desert of his mouth. But it’s that loose laugh of hers, when her head falls a bit backwards as her shoulders shake and she puts her hand over her stomach, that makes his heart flutter inside his chest… He doesn’t even notice when his smile turns into a shuddering sigh.

He clears his throat before taking a long taste of his whiskey, hoping the strong liquor down his throat would help to put himself together. This is getting ridiculous… He needs to figure out what this huddle of… strange feelings growing inside him every time he sees or even thinks of her means… He needs to figure that shit out soon. 

“Well, well, well.”

Steve’s voice grasps his attention as his eyes advert from her to meet his friend walking closer to him.

“What’s up, punk?” Bucky doesn’t even know why but he immediately hates that little teasing smile on Steve’s face, he decides to ignore it, though.

“That’s one vision I’m not really used to. Bucky Barnes drinking all alone at a party. Where’s the mini harem that it’s usually seen surrounding you at such events?” Steve asks, not trying to disguise the playful sarcasm in his words.

“Night is only beginning, pal,” Bucky answers, putting on a cocky smile and tapping on Steve’s shoulder, using a bit more strength than usual.

“Yeah, sure,” Steve chuckles, not thoroughly convincedby the excuse, “You know, ever since Nat and I came back from the mission, I’ve been hearing some interesting speculations from some members of the team who stayed here…”

“Do I wanna hear it?” Bucky cocks an eyebrow.

Steve hums, “The word is out you’re just not the same anymore,” he shrugs and sips from his drink, peeking Bucky from under his eyelashes.

“And what’s that supposed to mean?”

“They don’t see the usual parade of women coming and going from your apartment. Sam says there’s been one mysterious lady, though… but none of them seem to guess who.” With no hint of subtleness in him and with a teasing smirk on his lips, Steve turns his gaze to her direction across the room.

“Jesus…” Bucky huffs, shaking his head before drinking from his whiskey, “Fucking all mighty Avengers… Don’t you all have a World or two to save instead of gossiping about my private life?”

“Which was never really that private, let us be honest.” Steve laughs.

Bucky can’t help but to let out a small laugh, too, shrugging at the incontestability of the statement. He was never one to be much discreet about his shenanigans.

“What is that exactly?” Steve insists, nodding his head in her direction, where she still talks animatedly with her friends, “I didn’t know you were, ahm, close friends with Y/n from the tech department.”

“Didn’t you walk in on us the other day?” Bucky puts on a mocking frown at him, “Do you need me to reenact it for you, pal? You know I would have no problem with that, but we’re gonna have to ask her-“

“You’re such a jerk,” Steve cuts him off, his cheeks already showing a shade of pink at the memory, “And don’t you think I didn’t notice that little stunt on movie night, too,” he adds in a chastising way, but the scowl quick breaks into a smile when Bucky laughs, “You know what I’m talking about, you’re Bucky, you love ladies, as in plural, you have loved them ever since you were a kid in the 30’s, I have to admit you’ve always been respectful in your own way, but you were never been a guy to settle for just one for longer than a night or two…” Steve follows Bucky’s gaze, which has automatically navigated towards her. He lets out a knowing hum before speaking again, “But I guess your path just hadn’t crossed with hers, yet…”

Bucky looks back at Steve, whose eyes are gleaming with something like excitement. Bucky doesn’t know exactly how the words sink into him, but he feels like he can’t just disagree, not if he’s going to be completely honest. Never has he felt the need to be with only one woman for that amount of time until… until her. 

“I mean,” Steve continues after no answer from Bucky, “I think it’s great, it was about time for you to find someone-“

“Don’t go imagining unrealistic scenarios on your romantic little head, Punk. My name is not Steve Rogers to get off on,” a grimace twists Bucky’s face as he speaks, “Love, attachment… or any tacky sort of shit you’re into.”

Steve opens his mouth as if he were to say something, but lets out a frustrated sigh instead, pressing his lips into a taut line. 

“No, seriously, pal,” Bucky continues, in a less snapping tone, “Our, ahm, friendship is based exclusively on what you’ve seen and heard so far,” he smirks, “Sex. She had just gotten out of a long relationship and needed to get off, Nat thought of me - of course -introduced my dick to her pussy, they’ve become best of friends and here we are now,” he holds back a laugh, knowing damn well how the vulgar choice of words would make Steve’s 40’s little brain short-circuit, being the precise reason why he chose to put it that way. 

“Alright, alright, you’re just messing with me now,” Steve seems in a hurry to make his friend stop talking.

Bucky lets out the laugh he was holding and punches his friend’s shoulder, gaining a dirty look in response before resuming, “I mean… It’s nothing like you’re insinuating, she’s great and we’ve been having fun, that’s all,” Bucky adds as his gaze falls upon her again. Yeah… she’s great. And beautiful, sexy, funny, smart, kind- clearing his throat to dismiss his own betraying line of thoughts, he turns back to his friend.

“If you say so.” A small smile curls Steve’s lips, showing he’s anything but convinced. 

Goddammit, he does have a lot to figure out. 

~~~

“I knew something was up, Bucky never stays for movie nights.” Tears fill Sharon’s eyes from how hard she’s been laughing.

“I felt like a horny teenager in my parents’ home,” you resume the story you’ve been entertaining Sharon and Nat with, “Not that my teen years were that exciting,” you add with a grimace, “Far from it exactly, I was a tech nerd since I was eight, not really something that rocks teen boys’ worlds.” Bucky seems to really dig it, though, is the immediate thought that pops into your mind, but you see no reason why you should say it out loud.

“Well, it did bring you far enough,” Nat winks at you, moving her glass around the party being held to celebrate you to emphasize her point.

“Damn right,” Sharon agrees, raising her glass, which you and Nat quickly follow in a cheerful toast.

You can’t shake the smile of your lips. You wouldn’t go as far as to connect the events, but after your breakup with Eddie, it seems like you’re living another life. A new and more exciting life, both personally and professionally… That’s why it shouldn’t bother you so much that you still haven’t seen him. He said he would be there after you called to tell the news and invite him to come. But it does bother you to casually look around the party and not spotting him…

“So, it’s been like a month since this deal of yours started, right?” Nat asks, catching your attention after gulping from her customary vodka.

“Yeah,” your eyebrows furrow as you nod, “Sounds about right… and what a month, holy shitballs…” You round your eyes, letting out a puff.

“Care to share more details?” Sharon asks, wiggling her eyebrows. 

“Well…” You quickly survey the area around you and sneakily lean closer to them as they mimic you, “I had no idea what my body could do, I mean, I’ve been in positions I’ve never thought were humanly possible to perform, there’s not a day I don’t feel sore on every little inch of me, it’s a constant state by now,” you add, and the grin on your face tells how little the soreness really bothers you.

“Super soldiers…” Sharon smirks and winks before clinking her glass of champagne with yours. 

As Nat chuckles, you let out a giggle, “Yeah, I mean, my poor pussy hasn’t seen that much action her entire life.”

Nat’s jaw drops as she scoffs and turns to Sharon, “Check this out… this woman wouldn’t even say the word “sex” without choking before,” she points at you and you shrug, keeping the smile on your face. 

“That’s the Barnes effect,” Sharon comments, before turning to you, ”But wait a minute, how often you two have been keeping this encounters up?”

You take a second to think about it before answering, “Almost daily, I guess. When I don’t call him, he ends up calling me and so we go.”

“Really?” Nat asks and when you give her the confirmation, her brows snap together as a wondering “huh” slips out of her lips. 

She seems surprised by the fact you’re seeing Bucky practically every day, but you think nothing of it, “I’m sending you a whole box of this vodka you like so much, by the way.” You point at her glass, “You deserve it. I was just waiting for you to come back from that long ass mission of yours.”

He expression shifts to an amused one, “Oh, well, cheers to that,” she says before gulping down the rest of the liquid in her glass. 

“But let me ask you something,” Sharon cuts in, “You’ve been seeing him almost daily, having amazing sex with the Adonis we all have to agree Bucky is…” she looks at Natasha for support, who just nonchalantly shrugs her agreement, before turning back to you, “Don’t you think it can become a bit complicated? In the feelings area, I mean, Bucky can be pretty charming, but when it comes to commitment, well-” She tilts her head as a hint of concern is present on her voice.

Nat too focuses on you, interested in what you have as an answer.

You snort and waves dismissively at their concern, “No way. Don’t worry, you two. Neither of us are looking for such a thing. It is what it is: just sex. Bucky is amazing, I don’t think I would be able to have that sort of relationship with anyone other than him. He’s so relaxed and laid back, no games… he’s pretty clear with his intentions, which is no romance at all and that’s exactly what I need right now. We both want the exact same thing, that’s pretty clear ever since we set this deal and it’s not going to change,” you say with tranquility and firmness in your words.

“Are you sure?” Nat insists, giving you that look you know it’s all about her making sure you’re ok. “This whole idea came from me but I know Bucky for a long time, I know he’s not one to do feelings, but I’ve been worried about how you would take it.”

“Absolutely…” you guarantee “And to be honest, I know I need to work on it, I do, but when I think about a relationship, I mean, a conventional relationship, I still think of Eddie… I feel like I’m still too caught up on him to think of anyone else that way,” You shrug, pressing your lips in a line, “Bucky’s being really important to help me get through it all, though, I have to admit it.”

“Well… I’m glad.” Nat gives you a sympathetic smile, brushing a hand on your arm.

“Alright… I guess you have a boytoy, then, huh?” Sharon teases.

You laugh, before conceding with a nod, “Yeah, I guess I do.”

“Speaking of the devil,” Nat says in a quiet mumble and nods to behind your shoulder. 

Before you have the chance to turn around you hear his voice. That deep and raspy voice that usually makes your skin burn and tonight is no different, “Well, well, if it isn’t the power trio… Am I the devil by any chance?” Bucky steps beside you, narrowing his eyes at Natasha, before shooting you that captivating smile of his, the one that prompts a smile of yours to swiftly twist your lips too, “Hi,” he says softly.

“Hi,” you answer, seizing the moment to take him over. He looks absolutely ravishing with his styled fluff hair, light scruff shadowing his jaw and beautiful eyes stuck on you, wearing an untied blue suit over a casual white t-shirt that not every man could make it work. Sharon was damn right, Bucky really is charming… too charming for his own good.

“So, talking about me, ladies?” He insists, tilting his head and focusing a piercing gaze on you, despite addressing all three. 

There’s something about him… you just can’t stop smiling at his presence and, even worse, don’t seem to be able to tell a lie, not even an innocent one to save your ass, so you decide to take a sip of your champagne and leave it to your friends to answer the question. You guess boytoy can’t be worse than “human dildo”, like you called him before, but that has been just between you two…

“Yeah, yeah,” Sharon is the one to step in, holding back a laugh just like you, as Natasha, ever a pro, sustains a perfect poker face, “I haven’t seen Steve, yet and I was wondering if he would be with you.”

If you’ve seen a flicker of disappointment in his eyes it quickly vanishes as he turns to Sharon, “Oh, yeah, he was. Look, there he is by the bar,” Bucky points, “And you might wanna check the amount of Asgardian Liquor is being sneaked to him, the guy is already talking nonsense.”

“Oooo, Asgardian Liquor Steve is the best, I give twenty minutes before he starts summoning Mjölnir from wherever Thor is now,” Sharon’s face twinkles with excitement, “See you guys later,” she adds before rushing towards the bar and her boyfriend.

As a girl from the staff comes along and refills Nat’s glass with her special vodka, Bucky looks back at you. You smile at him but soon frowns a bit. There’s something different in the way he’s looking at you and you can’t just pinpoint what it is. There’s always sheer hunger in his gazes for you that makes your spine tremble, but tonight… there’s something a bit more… introspective in it, maybe?

“So, enjoying your night?” he asks.

You brush your thoughts away to answer, “Oh, shit, yeah… This is unbelievable. I was never one to party that much, but I could get used to this.” You sign with your glass around, still marveled by the over the top event being held in your name. “Tony is out of this world.”

“I’m pretty sure that’s true, though,” Natasha comments with an exaggerated eye roll.

You chuckle before a sight behind Bucky’s shoulders catches your eye.

“Hey, I-“ Bucky starts.

“He’s here,” cutting out whatever Bucky was gonna say to you, your voice comes out in a gasp as your hands run cold and your heart races.

“Who? Tony?” Bucky asks with a grin, turning his face towards the direction you’re staring at with startled eyes. 

“Eddie,” Nat is the one who answers, pointing at the man standing alone by the entrance, seeming a little lost as he glances around.

Not you nor Natasha sees when the smile on Bucky’s face falls. When he looks back around, though, he already has a lighthearted expression put on for you.

“I should go talk to him, right?” You check, shifting looks from him to Nat. As she just shrugs, curling the corner of her lips down - and by that, expressing exactly what she thinks - you appeal to Bucky, focusing pleading eyes on him. Deep down, you know what you wanna do, but for some reason, just needs someone to back you up. 

“Yeah-“ he clears his throat, “I mean, you invited him, haven’t you?” He tightens his lips at an attempt of a smile.

“You’re right.” You nod, biting your lips nervously and looking straight ahead, “See you guys later.” You wave, after taking one or two deep breaths.

Your shoulder brushes against Bucky as you walk past him and he turns his body around, following you with his gaze. He takes a long sip of his drink and places a hand inside his pocket, watching as you approach your ex-boyfriend. 

He tries hard to bury deep down inside him the tug on his chest.

“Oh, fuck…”

Natasha’s curse reminds him she’s still right there and he realizes she’s been watching him, with a dumbfounded expression he’s not used to seeing on her face.

He lets out a deep breath, “What?” 

Natasha scoffs and shakes her head, seeming in a state of disbelief, “This whole time I’d been worried about the wrong person.”

~~~

To be continued.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How you and Bucky react to the presence of your ex-boyfriend.

Previously:

Your shoulder brushes against him as you walk past Bucky and he turns his body around, following you with his gaze. He takes a long sip of his drink and places a hand inside his pocket, watching as you approach your ex-boyfriend. 

He tries hard to bury deep down inside him the tug on his chest.

“Oh, fuck…”

Natasha’s curse makes him turn to her and he realizes she’s been watching him, with a dumbfounded expression he’s not used to see on her face.

“What?”

She scoffs and shakes her head, seeming in an estate of disbelief, “This whole time I’d been worried with the wrong person.”

No point. Bucky sees absolutely no point in trying to make it like there isn’t turmoil twisting inside of him. Not for Natasha, anyway, it would be to no avail. Also, he’s pretty sure there’s a kicked puppy look on his face to make it harder for him to put on any kind of façade.

“Fuck,” he sighs and run his hand harshly over his face, “What the hell is this, Natasha?” He whines, failing at trying to not sound as helpless as he does.

“You tell me, buddy.” She points at him with her glass of vodka, tilting her head with interest.

“Shit,” he exhales, looking down, before his face snaps up at her, “I’m … just weird, I’m not myself these days.” Bucky bites his lower lip as if trying to somehow refrain from spilling the words, but he just can’t, he’s dying to let it all out. He steps closer to her and lowers his voice as much as he can with the loud music beating around them, “I’ve spent almost every day of the last month with her. I have absolutely no desire to see or think of another woman and I have to restrain myself constantly, cause if I had it my way I would call her every five minutes to check in on her, and… and when I’m thinking about her - which is all the time, I fucking swear - I wonder if she’s thinking of me, and now? I mean, right now? I feel like snatching the blade right now on my ankle and shooting it right on that fella’s throat.” Finally taking a breath after his rambling, he points in your direction, before turning to see you right when you’re letting out a small laugh at something the punk has said.

“Wow…” Natasha lets out a whistle.

“A few days ago,” he turns back to his friend, “I snuck into her closet to find out the name of her perfume. And you know what I did next? I bought a large bottle for myself, like a fucking creep,” sheer frustration plasters on his tone. 

“Oh my…,” Natasha snorts at the same time a mix of incredulity and amusement shines on her eyes, “That’s definitely creepy and it’s even worse than I imagined. The almighty Bucky Barnes, the I’m a whore and proud,” she thickens her voice playfully, moving her arms in a mimicking way, “The I don’t do romance and attachments king is a tiny lost puppy with big blue heart eyes, aww,” she inclines her head as if she’s thinking of him as exactly how she’s just described him.

Bucky tries but he can’t actually find the amusement in all of that. The fact one single woman is making him feel that way is entirely new, unpredictable and… scary as hell. He has no clue where to go from there.

Natasha seems to swiftly catch on his little inner self torment and, after letting out a deep sigh, she puts on a small smile and shakes her head, “Don’t worry Bucky, it’s probably a crush. A big one. But only a crush,” she places her hand on his arm, giving it a squeeze, “Y/n is one of my best friends and I know how delightful it is to be beside her. Maybe you’re just infatuated…”

“Maybe…” he exhales and shrugs, “I wouldn’t know… all I know is I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. Not that I remember…. but I’m pretty sure I would.” He looks at you again while you’re still talking to the Eddie guy. 

“They have history,” Natasha says in a kind voice, following your gaze.

“I know.”

“He was her first and only boyfriend.”

“I know.”

“She thought she was going to marry him.”

“Damn Nat…” he breathes out his frustration, dropping his head for a moment, before raising his downcast gaze at her again, “Yeah, I know that, too.”

“But you’re Bucky fucking Barnes,” she snaps in a more cheerful voice shaking his arm with a enthusiastic force, “Don’t forget that, buddy,” she shoots him a warning glare, “Also, I’ve never seen a brighter smile on that woman than when she’s talking about you,” she beams. 

Bucky’s heart jumps and a quick breathy smile surges on his lips before he takes in a shuddering breath, “I’m not sure what I should do, though.”

“Well, figure it out,” she lets go of his arm and taps on it, “My advice for the night if you should accept it is let it flow,” she shrugs. “Go on with your thing and see what happens. Just try not to hurt you or her on your way, though,” Nat warns.

“I’m not even sure I-Wait,” he frowns after his gaze is drawn to the spot where you are again, “Did that fucker just leave her alone?”

He instantly struts towards you, ignoring Nat’s snicker.

~~~

“Hey,” you smile, gulping down the nervousness down your throat as you approach your ex-boyfriend. The one you haven’t seen ever since he broke up with you months ago.

“Hey,” he offers you a tight but kind smile back.

You halt on your way, the awkwardness building up a barrier on your way as you’re not sure what to do next. Should you give him your hand to shake? Hug him? Do nothing at all? Not once before you had thought that moment would play out between you and Eddie.

But he seems a bit more resolved than you and shrugs, leaning forward and wrapping an arm around your shoulders, “Congratulations again,” he says, still holding you, “You’re the best and most hard working person I know, you deserve it.”

The small smile in your lips grows wider and you accept the compliment, relieved that the awkwardness seems to be tamed. While you’re so close to him after all that time, you notice he’s wearing the same perfume he’s been wearing for years, the one which would make you sneeze all the time, but you never really said anything.

“Thank you,” you lean back, sniffing discreetly to suppress the sneeze threatening to come out, “I’m happy you could make it,” you add. The fact he’s arrived all by himself grasps your interest, considering how everyone around you would tell you he was probably seeing someone else… however, if he did have someone, he wouldn’t bring them to your party, would he?

“Of course. I wouldn’t miss it,” he says with a gentle tone, but the formality is still there, you notice. 

You two engage in some small conversation and you can’t help but to take him in and realize that, just like the perfume, Eddie looks exactly the same with everything else. The same hairstyle, same grey t-shirt you gifted him on your last Christmas together, the same constant half smile while he talks… he still speaks quietly, letting out just a few small words, which has always forced you to be the one to push on the conversations…

It’s… familiar… even comfortable, you dare say. But if you’re going to be honest with your own feelings, ever since he walked away, you thought you would be yearning to feel that familiarity again, that it would lead you to a sense of… home.

Why it isn’t quite like that, though?

“You look different,” he says as the subjects of small talk seem to come to an ending point. 

You put your previous thoughts aside for later consideration.

“Oh…Different good or bad?” you ask, tilting your head with a small pull in the corner of your lips.

“I don’t know… just…different, I guess,” he frowns and quickly puts on that half smile of his.

“Oh, well… it’s been a while…“

“Yeah… I guess you’re right,” he says, regarding you with a wondering look in his eyes that makes you shift on your knees, “Listen,” he clears his throat, “I was wondering if we could meet to talk one of these days.”

“Oh,” you draw in a breath. Talking to him, having a real conversation, is something you’ve been wanting to do for a long time. It still feels like you don’t fully understand why you’re broken-up. Regardless the time it’s passed, you still feel attached to him somehow, like, no matter how exciting and new, you’re now living someone else’s life and not the one you had planned for you years ago.

“I mean,” he adds before you can give him a proper answer, “We still need to figure out what to do about the condo.”

The words are like cold water thrown at your face. There you are, thinking he wanted to talk about your relationship, but what’s really on his mind is the condo you’ve bought together. Swiftly, you work on putting a small smile on your face, “Yeah… sure, you’re right,” you nod.

“Hey! Eddie!”

Both of you look towards the female voice and your eyes fall upon a beautiful young woman you recognize as one of the members of SHIELD’s tech team. You’ve worked with her on a joined project of the two organizations before. Chloe… you believe her name is Chloe.

She’s waving at Eddie excitedly, calling him over the little group she’s with. She doesn’t seem to notice you’re standing next to him until her gaze meets yours. The wide grin on her face drops into a quick cringe before she nods in a respectful manner and shifts her look away, whispering something at one of the guys in the group.

When you set your attention back on Eddie, you tighten your lips just as you notice how the bone on his throat bobs right before his flustered eyes meet yours again.

“I-I, ahm, gotta go,” he runs his hand on the nape of his neck, “Can I call you later?”

“Yeah, sure.” Your voice comes out calm and controlled.

“It was good to see you,” he says, before placing his hand on your shoulder, “Congratulations again.”

After you give him a small nod as a thank you, keeping the tight smile on your face matching his, he walks away towards the group and the woman. The one your friends kept warning you about, apparently, given how uncomfortable he seemed to be in front of you after you saw her. As soon as he gets there, you see the two of them talking in hushed words. He keeps a safe distance from her, but his hand on her arm is where your gaze sticks on. 

You don’t have the slightest idea of what’s happening with your feelings right now. Minutes ago you were realizing the familiarity of Eddie wasn’t what you expected it to be anymore, but now, seeing him so close to someone else… a beautiful woman, to be more specific, with her long black straightened hair and fancy blue dress holding each one of her beautiful curves…It just crushes you. A lump grows in your throat and while your gaze flicks around, you feel small… lost… picturing ways you could flee away from your own party at the same time ten years of your life flash in your mind.

The cold, yet gentle touch of metal in your elbow is what takes you out of your own head, “Hey, everything alright?” says the silky and soothing voice.

Your gaze meets Bucky’s while he stares at you with concerned eyes. Those gorgeous blue eyes of his…There’s already a bit less turbulence inside your chest and mind. You think nothing of it, though.

“Yeah, yeah…” you smile, “He, ahm… Some friends called him. He had to go.”

Bucky just lets out a hum – which sounds more like a groan – staring over your shoulder to where the little group stands.

“He said he wants to talk…“ you start, and don’t see when Bucky’s breath hatches catches on his throat, his eyes back on you, “About the condo,” you press your lips, “He said he’ll call me.”

While your gaze gets lost ahead, you have no idea that the sadness in them pinches deep inside Bucky’s chest. If you could read Bucky’s mind at that moment, you would find out that the fact your reencounter with your ex-boyfriend hadn’t ended up in some sort of hope for reconciliation hasn’t left him sad at all, but the lost look in your eyes… makes him wanna hold you in his arms and never let go. Not before punching a douche in the face, of course.

“Oh, come on, sweetheart,” he wraps his arm around your shoulder, side hugging and pulling you closer to him, “You’re the fucking boss now and, look around, ” he gestures with his glass of whiskey to the crowded and jazzing place, ”You have a damn Stark party just for you. We’re all here to celebrate the badass motherfucker you are. You’re not just going to let anything ruin your night, will you?” The corner of his eyes crinkle as he grins at you.

You let out a small laugh, the heaviness inside you slowly slipping out of your body as you allow yourself to synchronize with Bucky’s vibe. You can always trust the upbeat way he presents the world to you to lift whatever mood of yours up. You look down at your empty glass and shrugs, “I might need a refill, though…or two,” you shoot him a warning look. 

Bucky’s smile stretches even wider and he lets go of your shoulders to offer his arm, nodding towards the bar, “Shall we?”

You gladly accept his suggestion by wrapping your hand around his elbow and walking with him, not even noticing that Eddie’s gaze follows you with piqued interest.

~~~

Quite a few more drinks later and after listening to Tony’s very nice and very Tony speech on his toast to honor you, you’re already fully invested in your party again. Bucky stays by your side most of the time, but you also come across with a lot of your friends from work and a few others, who are all more than happy to put you high on a pedestal for your promotion and party with you. It stings a bit when Camilla, your friend from work, tells you she heard Eddie and Chole are really together, but two or three more drinks after, you end up hitting the dance floor with a few friends by your side, not even seeing when Eddie leaves the party early, right before Chloe.

You’re happy to see that Amanda, one of Bucky’s friends you met that night in the club, has made it to the party, but you’re already too tipsy and it slips from your attention when she comments on how Bucky has been quite distant from her and the other girls for almost a month now.

If you’re going to be honest, you end up not truly noticing a lot of stuff since you’ve been drinking a great deal more than you’re used to, probably due the drill of having a kickass party thrown for you mixed with the unexpected sight of Eddie with a potential new girl - after months without seeing him. As the alcohol does its thing in your senses, you don’t notice the way Bucky looks at you, the way he holds you a little bit stronger when you’re dancing together, how he glares at the guys who tries to approach you or the fact he only leaves your side when he knows you’re comfortable and safe.

All you see and feel now is the music and the lights as you sway your hips to the beats. The party is almost coming to an end, but there’s still a small crowd of people enjoying their last moments there. The alcohol, the music and your friends, more precisely Camilla, Olivia, Amanda and Nat – the last two in the middle of a flirting contest you fail to notice, as well – are the ones around you. The buzz clouds your mind in a delicious way until your back bumps into a hard wall. Your weakened knees give in but before you hit the floor the wall wraps around you and holds you still.

Oh, you know that hard wall of muscles… You know it pretty well.

“Hey, there.” A foolish smile plasters on your lips at the same time the back of your head leans against the wall so you can see his face. His gorgeous and ungodly sexy face, “Your face is sexy,” you decide it is a very good idea to tell him that now.

“That right?” Bucky smirks, holding your gaze.

“Oh, yeah,” you clumsily turn around to face him, prompting him to grab you tighter since you stumble a bit on your toes. You curl the hand holding your glass around his neck, “And you’re big, too,” you don’t even notice but you’re a slurring mess as you speak and look to see your running hand down his broad chest, roughly probing his muscles, “Very, very big,” you exaggerate a sultry tone, the alcohol erasing any kind of subtleness or refinement in you or the notion that there are people around you, while your hand explores further down his body to say it’s not just about his muscles you’re talking about.

“Sweetheart.” Not making a big fuss about it, he gently grabs your wrist over his lower stomach to place it around his neck along with the other one, ”I’m very flattered to hear that, you’re one very nice piece of ass yourself, too,” he engages with you, keeping the playful tone.

You let out a girlish giggle, turning your face towards your friends, the trio now whispering and laughing among themselves as they watch the both of you, “He said I have a nice ass,” you shout, not realizing how loud you actually are as you lift and shake your hips, making your friends laugh harder and causing you to trip on your toes once again. But of course Bucky catches you before you fall.

“How many drinks, so far, huh?” Bucky chuckles, keeping the hold of his arms and eyes on you.

“Three or four,” you answer with nonchalance, bringing the glass to your lips as you hold yourself on his neck, only to pout when you notice it’s empty.

Your friends scoff at your lie behind you, “You can add at least ten more to that count, sweetheart,” Natasha shouts from behind you, punctuating the word sweetheart with a teasing pull on her mouth. 

You make a dismissive face only Bucky can see, “Nonsense, check out what I can do,“ You step back from Bucky with the intention to put on a yoga pose you’re sure will convince your friends of how ok and steady you are and as soon as you lift your leg, you trip again and this time Bucky is not fast enough to catch you before your ass hit the floor.

The four of them rush to help you out as tears fall down from your eyes at how much you’re laughing, holding your glass up. It’s Bucky who ends up picking you up, though.

He and your friends shower you with questions to check if you’re ok but it all falls like a blur sound to your years.

“Ok, I guess it was a bit more than three or five,” ignoring the curious eyes around your group, you laugh making an ok sign with your hands before your stomach churns and you grimace, placing your hand over it, “Oh…” your face drops.

“Alright, come one, let’s go,” Bucky supports you with his hands and urges you to walk with him.

“Where are you taking me?” You frown, sounding almost offended as he takes your glass from you and hands it to Natasha, gently pulling you along.

“My place… let’s freshen up, come on,” Bucky patiently says, nodding at the girls to say goodbye, who just nod back, knowing you would be in good hands. 

“Ooooo, bye girls, we’re going to his place to freshen up,” you wink exaggeratedly and make air quotations with your fingers, addressing your friends as you clumsily walk away with Bucky.

~~~

“Bridal style,” you loudly announce stretching your hands and legs to the air as soon as he steps inside his living room with you in his arms.

Bucky can’t help but laugh as a snorting giggle follows your words. If he had his way he would’ve carried you from the party, but he didn’t want to attract even more attention to your state. So, on the second trip on your own feet inside the elevator he picked you up. It would be easier that way.

Bucky carefully puts you standing on the floor and, as soon as he’s convinced you can stand on your feet without stumbling or falling, he turns to shut the door, only to have you jumping on him as soon as he faces you.

“Hey, hey,” he manages to say softly, placing his hands on your hips as you shower his mouth and face with sloppy kisses which taste strongly like fancy champagne.

“What? Let’s freshen up,” you answer in a log slur, dragging your lips on anything of him you can reach.

Bucky laughs, pushing you away with a gentle yet steady touch, looking deep into your eyes, “That’s not what I meant… not when you had so much to drink, sweetheart.” He flicks his thumb on your chin.

It takes a moment or two, but realization – and disappointment- finally dawns on your face, “Oh… you meant freshen up for real…” You shut your eyes and tap your hand on your forehead.

Bucky thinks you’re too damn cute for your own good.

You focus on him again, “Are you sure, though?” You insist, shoving a finger in your mouth and tilting your hips, putting on before him the unsexist pose Bucky has ever seen.

Yet, it’s the most adorable thing and his annoying heart swells inside his chest for you as you keep your attempts of seducing him, “Yeah, I’m sure,” he nods unrelentingly, holding back a laugh and waiting to see the follow up of your shenanigans.

“But I’m horny and I wanted to suck your big dick,” you pout, crossing your arms and thumping your foot against the floor.

Bucky takes in a deep breath. He is only human and can’t help that his poor cock twitches at your bratty whine. But your glossy half open eyes and dragged voice reminds him he’s the only one sober enough to make decisions in the room and therefore, his buddy down there needs to chill, “I’ll be more than happy to allow you to do so,” he’s amused when your face light up, “But not tonight, sweetheart,” he puts his hands on your shoulders and turns you towards the kitchen, not without spotting the dirty look you give him.

“You’re no fun,” you complain, barely able to put one foot in front of the other before you stop and swirl around, trusting on his strong hold to not let you fall wearing a devilish little smirk on your face. 

Bucky cocks an eyebrow, waiting for whatever mischievous pearl will come out of your lips now.

“What if…” you start before a hiccup interrupts you, “I show you my boobies?” You offer, leaning over and pressing your breasts together through your dress, “You looove my boobies,” you wiggle your eyebrows suggestively even if your eyelids can’t even remain wide open.

“I do love your boobies,” Bucky can’t deny, not hiding his amusement. 

Apparently, that’s all you need to hear before you throw yourself on him again. Bucky swiftly catches you with a huff, but you can’t do much more than circle your arms around his neck and rest your head on him.

“Love your muscles,” you mumble quietly against him, “There are so many of them.”

“Come on, sweetheart,” Bucky tries, “As much as I love your boobies and you love my muscles, now it’s not the time. Now it’s time to get you some water, maybe a sandwich, huh? Then I can prepare you a shower and you can rest a bit and… Y/N?” Bucky calls when you’re too quiet- not even making a sex innuendo when he mentions a shower.

He listens a not so soft snore as a response and looks down to see you completely dozed, with your mouth agape against his chest. He sighs… still the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen, goddammit.

“Guess we can skip right to the resting, then,” he whispers through a fond smile.

Taking you in his arms he walks towards his bedroom and places you on his bed. You only stir a bit when he gently removes your shimmery and apparently uncomfortable dress and unties your heels. He dresses you in a t-shirt of his so you can rest comfortably. He manages to make you drink a little bit of water, to which you whine graciously enough, and, after covering you with a thin blanket – because he knows you’re never really that cold at night, no matter the temperature in the room – he moves to get up and maybe take a shower for himself.

“Bucky,” you mumble and, without opening your eyes, you move yourself to nuzzle against his metal hand sprawled on the mattress, “You’re not going to leave me, are you?”

Bucky is absolutely sure you have no idea of what that question really means to him, how it falls upon the rising tangle of feelings inside him… which is all for you. Wonderful and beautiful and special you, who came unannounced and stirred up something in him he never thought possible. Something he just doesn’t know what to do with.

Moving meticulously slowly not to pull his hand and wake you up again now that you’re deep back into slumber, he lays down beside you. For your question… he doesn’t say anything. Simply because he doesn’t know the right answer yet.

~~~

To be continued.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Not all hangovers are bad.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Someone once asked me about the one scene that made me start thinking about writing the whole story and I answered I hadn’t written it yet. Well, it’s been written now and you’ll find it by the end of the chapter.

A splitting ache around your eyebrows makes you grimace before you - almost unwillingly - half open an eyelid. The room is dark, encouraging you to force the other eye to open as well. You swallow the unwelcome taste of sheer hungover down your dry throat. It takes you a moment to realize where you are. Bucky’s bedroom. And there is the man, sleeping on his side, facing you, as your hand rests on top of his metal one.

He’s so beautiful… Your lips curl in a small smile just enough to not make your head hurt even more and you lean in a bit closer to him, before you give in to that drunk fatigue still aching in your muscles and mind, drifting back to sleep.

It’s only a couple of hours after that Bucky stirs and his eyelids flutter open. He takes in a deep sigh when he finds the two of you in the same position you were when he fell asleep beside you. Only that now you’re a tad closer, while your hand rests on his in the space between you two.

Bucky realizes you two spent the night together without anything sexual happening and it’s an odd feeling because that’s a first for him. Yeah… an odd feeling, but…you’re so beautiful… his heart jumps with the thought of how it would feel like to wake up beside you every morning. He smiles a bit when he leans even closer and, despite feeling the distinctive smell of champagne you had the night before, the faint scent of your perfume lingers in the air of his bedroom.

Since last night, he has decided to follow Nat’s advice. This… all these scary but exciting feelings, this is all new to him and he needs to figure it out. Figure him out. He’ll let it flow, like Nat said, spend his time with you and see what comes next, if this is just a crush, or…

A grunt comes out of your lips before you squirm and pull your hand from his to place it over your head.

“Ugh, my head,” you whine, with eyes still closed, before risking an eye open to look at Bucky, “Good morning,” you greet, smiling as wide as you can manage to.

“Good morning, sunshine,” Bucky chuckles, “Even though I’m pretty sure it’s past noon by now.”

“Ugh, shit,” you curse, opening both eyes to look down at your body and see his t-shirt on you, “Did we?” you ask as your eyes squint, before looking back at him, “Because I don’t remember anything and I like to remember that kind of stuff,” you finish.

Bucky chuckles again, shifting to lean his head up on his hand, “No, we didn’t,” he answers, “Not from lack of trying from your end, though. You can be pretty, ahm, insistent while drunk, sweetheart,” he comments, with no sign of judgment or reprehension in his tone, “You needed to show me your boobies no matter what,” he smirks and nods towards your chest.

“Oh, my God.” You cover your eyes with your hand before lifting it a bit to peek at him, shaking your head, “That’s so embarrassing, I’m sorry. And you had to bring me here? Take care of my drunk ass? Ugh… I’m sorry.”

“Don’t worry,” he winks at you, “You were cute and hilarious. And I love spending time with you, wasted or not.” The words spill out of his mouth without warning and he bites his lip. Hopefully, you won’t think too much of it.

You smile a bit before widening your eyes with horror dropping on your face, “Oh shit, I fell on my damn ass, didn’t I? Jesus, I was so shit faced, everyone saw me, I’m gonna get fucking fired.” You cover your eyes again. 

“Hey, hey, now,” Bucky leans over and gently pulls your hand off your eyes, taking it into his, lacing his fingers into yours while he rests them between the two of you and, “Did you completely forget who promoted you?” He cocks an eyebrow, “It’s Tony Stark we’re talking about here, sweetheart, if anything, you’ll probably see a bonus on your paycheck by the end of the month,” he says like it’s just the obvious thing to happen.

You laugh, and, naturally, Bucky sports a smile on his lips, too. “That’s true.” You nod your agreement. 

“Are you ok?” Bucky asks, slowly brushing his thumb on the back of your hand.

“Oh, fuck no. Feels like there’s a drumming monkey in my head, a big cotton ball in my mouth and my stomach decided to become an acrobat right now, even though I think I might be a little hungry.” You pout. 

“Aw…poor thing, hungover like shit,” Bucky coos and pulls your hand to his lips, placing a kiss on it and making the pout in your mouth turn into a small smile, “We can fix all of that soon, don’t worry,” he rests your hands back on the mattress, “But, no, I mean, you seemed a bit shook after your talk with your ex, last night…”

“Oh, that…” you raise your eyebrows and sigh, “Yeah- I was pretty excited to see him, you know?” You roll your eyes, letting out a huff, displeased with your own feeling, “It had been a long time and I missed that familiarity; you know? But, as I was talking to him, yes,” you narrow your eyes, “he did feel familiar, but… at the same time, it’s like… I don’t know,” you shrug, “I didn’t belong?” You pause briefly, as if taking a second look into your feelings.

Bucky says nothing, waiting for you to continue while he keeps his hand on yours.

“But then I saw him with that woman, and I’m not even sure if they’re together or not, but it sure seems like it and it stung…” You laugh quietly at your admission, but there is no humor in it. “I felt like shit. I mean… when did that begin? Were we still together when he started seeing her? That’s the real reason why he broke up with me? I mean…” Your eyes drop to your joined hands, before you look back at him, “It’s not like I’m crying all by myself, but there’s nothing romantic between us, our deal was never about that.”

Bucky nods and offers you a tight smile, the best one he can put on, holding his breath so he doesn’t let slip any kind of reaction that could give away how the terms of your deal, which he was so keen to establish a while ago, now bites on his chest. 

“The way he acted when I saw her…” you resume while your eyes cast down, “It seemed like he was trying hard to hide something from me,” you sigh before looking back at him, “I’m glad you were there… you saved the night for me, thank you,” you smile, gaining a shy one in response, “Anyway, I think I should go, I’ve bothered you enough-“ you move to get up.

“Wait, no,” Bucky tightens the hold on your hand, keeping you on the bed, “Hey, ahm, don’t you wanna go grab something to eat? I’ve learned in the most delicious way that hamburgers and maybe a shake are the best medicine for a hangover. I know an amazing place…”

You eye him playfully, “I seriously doubt there’s any scientific reason for that combination to be any good for hangovers, but as you can hear, my stomach has very little to oppose to your idea,” you laugh, after a loud groan from your belly, “Deal.” You nod, making Bucky’s cheeky smile stretch wider, before you look down at your body, “I’m gonna need to drop by my apartment and change, though, I only have my dress from last night and heels to wear.” You grimace.

“Not a problem,” Bucky winks, “We can get there in a minute.”

~~~

Bucky wasn’t kidding when he said a minute. It was the first time he took you somewhere on his bike, if such a potent machine could be called simply a bike. It’s the blackest motorcycle you’ve ever seen and the modern design, along with the powerful engine has definitely been touched by the hands of Tony Stark, which makes it so unique. It’s pretty dysfunctional to ride to your home at a ridiculous speed with your shimmery dress on, but like Bucky promised, you are there faster than anticipated, and after putting a comfy combo t-shirt and jeans, you hop on his backseat again.

With your arms wrapped tightly around his body, you smile under your helmet when you spot the familiar bridge. He’s taking you to Brooklyn. In a few minutes, he leaves his bike in a parking lot and you two walk towards the Burger Joint he was so keen to take you to.

~~~

“Holy shitballs, Bucky, this burger is the shit,” you gush, not remotely fazed by speaking with a mouthful, “I don’t ever wanna stop eating this. Ever. I’m moving to this place, that’s it, it’s settled,” you add, before digging in for another powerful bite.

Bucky chuckles, chewing his own burger, “Damn right it’s good. It’s an 80-year-old recipe.”

You frown, before glancing around. The place is small and, since it’s a Saturday, it was crowded by the time you got there, but you and Bucky have been promptly directed to a separated and private little table and you figured it was due his Avenger status. The small joint has a modern decoration, but now you see quite a few pictures on the wall that seem to have been taken on different decades. Your jaw drops at the realization.

“You mean this was around back in your day?” You practically jump on your seat. 

He gives you a small smile and points at one particular picture above your head. You see what looks like a family, sitting around a table exactly like the one you’re on right now, laughing and holding hamburgers on their hands and… Wait-

“Is that-“

“Yup, that’s little 18-year-old me,” he says as you stare, astonished at the younger, boyish version of Bucky, sporting one of the best smiles you’ve ever seen on him. And now you recognize the tiny blonde dude beside him, too.

“Oh my God, how cool is that?” you whisper, entranced by the picture right before your eyes. There’s a woman with a teen girl sitting at her side on the sofa, while on the other sofa sat one Steve Roger and Bucky himself, with a little girl on his lap.

“This was a lot different back then.” He gestures around, “Less cool than these days, I guess. But the current owner is the grandson of the owner back then and kept the recipe exactly the same. The sauce is the secret, but don’t try to make him talk, that one is a tough cookie,” he warns, only half kidding.

“This is amazing… that’s Steve, right?” You point, “What about the girls? Who are they?” you ask, finally taking your eyes off the picture to look at him.

“Yeah that’s Steve, of course, and that pretty lady right there is my mom, Winnifred,” he says, pointing at a woman in the picture, “That is my sister Rebecca,” he shifts his finger to the girl sitting beside her, who must be somewhere between 13 or 14 years old, “And that is Mary, my youngest sister. She was four when that was taken.” With deep fondness in his voice, he gestures towards the little girl on his lap, whose smile is the biggest as she barely is able to hold straight the big burger on her tiny hands.

“Wow…” you marvel, taking another long look at the picture, noticing the sheer happiness the little group exhaled. It’s a bittersweet feeling, to know they had no idea what would eventually fall upon the couple of guys there, “They’re beautiful, Bucky,” you say in a soft tone, looking back at him. 

“It was a big fuss that day… took me some time to remember it, but now I see it clearly in my head, like it was yesterday,” there’s a nostalgic glimmer in Bucky’s eyes and a longing on his voice as he speaks, concentrating his gaze on the picture for a moment, before focusing on you, “Old Larry, the owner back then, hired a photographer to take those pics of the clients… the girls were really excited, couldn’t stop talking about it later.”

“You used to come here a lot?” You ask, putting your elbow on the table and supporting your head over your hand, forgetting for a moment about your burger.

“I mean… sort of,” he shrugs, “Money was short, Dad died when Mary was still a baby and mom, the girls and myself mostly ate at home, but I started making some gigs ever since I was a boy and whenever I got paid a little extra I would bring them here.” He laughs a bit, but you spot the darker…sadder tone underneath it.

You’re not sure if it’s the memory itself or the fact it’s happened so long ago and it’s so distant from his reality now, but you see how it clearly affects him to talk about that time, that people. His family. The urge to touch him is strong enough to make you reach out and cover his hand with yours. You give it a squeeze and offer him a smile.

He lifts his eyes from where you’re touching him to your face and when you nod, he continues, “Well, don’t fool yourself, it was still pretty cheap, it got all fancy now.” Bucky looks around and take in a deep breath, “It was amazing, nevertheless. Steve would come with us most of the time. Rebecca always whined when he didn’t, I think the kid had a crush on the punk,” he chuckles, looking down and shaking his head.

You laugh, too and, as he keeps talking about those little treasures that you think his memories are, you stay silent, watching him while your thumb draws circles on his hand. You now realize that, in your time with Bucky, while you weren’t busy ravishing each other, whenever you two talked, you talked about you. He’s always been honest and straightforward, but he never really shared much of his own life. It’s intriguing how it makes you feel, to see this side of him… a tightness in your chest, a desperate need to comfort him, but also to let him talk because… because he’s just fascinating. 

“We would stay hours after we’re done with the food,” he continues, “Just talking and laughing until Old Larry would glare at us to make us leave… but he always snuck some candy into my pockets for the girls after I paid the bill. Rebecca would offer hers to Steve on our way home, but Mary, dear God, Mary always had all of hers eaten before we turn the second corner, no matter what ma and I would say…” He takes in a deep breath, staring distantly at your hands.

“They seem like a handful,” you playfully comment.

“They were…” Bucky’s smile grows before it almost completely vanishes while he doesn’t move his gaze up and murmurs, “I just wish I had more time with them.”

When you hear the break in his voice, you don’t even think before rushing up from your seat and in two steps, you’re seated on his booth beside him. As gentle as you can, you cup his cheeks and lift his face, turning it to you. You just look at him for a moment, smiling tightly to try and convey all the understanding you’re feeling as he struggles to look directly into your eyes. The first kiss, you place on his cheek, feeling through your touch and proximity when he sighs. Then you move slowly to the other cheek, prolonging the kiss there before you prep a quick one on the tip of his nose.

Your mouth naturally seeks his and your lips lock on each other in a quiet and gentle caress. He accepts your lips, responding to the kiss immediately, but this is nothing like the other many kisses you’ve shared before. It’s not hungry. There’s no lust, no ravishing desire that would lead to something else like the other times. Just a puzzling need to kiss him. And yet, you would trade all the other kisses that came before for that one. It feels brand-new… intimate…

It feels yours.

You break the kiss. You have to do it, otherwise the feelings and thoughts it is evoking inside you could lead you to a very dangerous road. One that wouldn’t fit in yours and Bucky’s arrangement. You keep your hands cupping his face, though, because you simply can’t stop touching him right then. 

“I never talk about them to anyone except Steve,” he whispers, “Most people don’t even know I had two sisters.” His gaze for you is as saddened as you have never seen on him.

“It’s wonderful that you have those memories, Bucky, thank you for sharing them with me,” you speak softly, with an equally soft smile on your face, “I wish you had more time with them, too, but from what I see in that picture, you made whatever little time together worth every minute,” you add, honestly. You breathe relieved when you spot his smile slowly coming back to his face. You can see the layers of sadness on his gaze fading to reveal something else you understand as gratitude.

There’s so much it was taken from him, anyone that sees his laidback, positive and incredibly kind persona would think it all doesn’t hurt anymore, but it’s still there. You see that now. You feel the… admiration… you have for him swelling tenfold inside you, for managing to keep going and live his life the way he lives and being the incredible person he is despite it all.

“Thanks for saying that, really.” He takes your hands from his face in his and brings one, then another to his lips, placing two tender kisses on them that makes your heart beat a little funny, “I wish you had met them,” he adds, with a longing expression on his face.

“Me too,” you tighten your lips.

His eyes gleam with your answer and he smiles, continuing in a more upbeat tone, “Come on, back to eat now and let me order you the milkshake Becca always had, I think you’ll love it.”

You obviously do not oppose the idea and after you’re both finished with your burger and the vanilla shake and, surprisingly enough, he was right about the combo being a good remedy for hangovers, he invites you to walk around Brooklyn by feet, which you gladly accept.

Almost every corner is a trip down memory lane, with Bucky knowing the neighborhood like the palm of his hand. You love it. You love to know every alley he would rescue Steve from buying fights against much bigger guys than him, where Bucky kissed the first dame of his life, where his favorite ice-cream shop used to be… you don’t tell him anything, and you don’t even know what to make of it, but every little detail he opens up about his life is like a magnet, pulling you closer and closer to him. You try not to dwell on it and enjoy the evening by his side.

You end up coming across a Tech Store you’ve been planning to visit for a long time but never found the time. Bucky, the most hardcore fan of your brains, watches you, excited like a little kid, as you snort at every poor piece of technology you find, compared to what you do working with the Stark brand. You leave before giving the chance of being accused of industrial espionage - which would be ridiculous considering the “trash they make there”, you say, to Bucky’s absolute delight. 

After watching the sunset while eating popcorn at Brooklyn Bridge Park, it’s Bucky who drags you by the hand through a tiny hidden door that leads to a Karaoke Bar.

When you shoot him a questioning look, he shrugs, “It’s Britney night. There’s a contest,” he explains like it’s the most obvious thing for a more than one-hundred-year-old Avenger to say.

~~~

“I can’t believe we won,” you laugh, stepping into your living room with Bucky on your toes and a trophy in your hands, which the two of you have won for the duet of “Toxic”, to which you agreed after a couple of beers.

“Of course we did,” Bucky takes off his jacket and leaves it on your hanger as you place the little trophy on the center table, “Even though I don’t think we can give much credit to your silk and soft voice, sweetheart,” he teases whilst walking closer to you, referencing your poor attempt of mimicking Britney Spears’s voice.

You fake an offended gasp, “Maybe we should thank your dancing moves, then. I didn’t know I was dealing with a twerking expert.” You halfheartedly push him on his shoulder and he catches your hand there, pulling you closer while doing that.

He laughs and his nose scrunches up in the sweetest of ways. Has it always done that?

“It was fun though,” he says, guiding your hand to circle his neck before placing both of his on your hips.

“It was,” you agree, wrapping now both arms around his neck.

You stare at each other for a long while. His face, so close to yours, looks so relaxed and beautiful. You watch when he worries his lower lip between his teeth. His lips are soft, red and enticing… The thought of kissing him again has wandered in your mind the whole day, just to check if it will feel as different and amazing and…yours, like the one back in the burger joint. 

Without saying anything, you lean over, brushing your parted lips against his and the heat of his breath fans over your mouth before you give in to your wish and kiss him. He sighs through your lips as you dip your fingers into his locks and he pulls you closer to him. His tongue gently seeks and rubs against yours while his hand skims up your back till he holds a firm grip on your neck. Your heart hammers in your chest when you recognize that strange little feeling of belonging again and you want more, you want to feel him wholly, you want him to hold you as you hold him back, to feel his hands… his skin on yours. You sink a hand under his t-shirt, bunching up the fabric as you move up and he parts away from you to pull it off by the collar and drop it aside. 

He just stands there in front of you, though, panting and with an unsure look on his eyes… like he doesn’t know what to do next, like he needs you to guide him somehow. As unexpected and uncharacteristic of him that may be, you don’t question anything and just take him by the hand and walk backwards towards your bedroom, pulling him with you like it was the first time he’s ever been there.

You can’t part your gaze from his while you stop by the end of your bed and let go of his hand to take off your t-shirt and the rest of your clothes next. He does the same, unzipping his pants and pulling it down with his boxes. You both move in a matched slow rhythm, no rush, despite the intense desire you know there is in both of you.

You offer him your hand again, which he promptly takes, and you smile, eliciting one of his own. You sit on the mattress, before dragging yourself up and laying on your back. He crawls over you, settling between your legs, and your sweet little heaven begins, while he unhurriedly kisses and licks every little bit of skin he finds. You breathe hard, putting your hands on the back of his head, tangling your fingers on his soft hair as he goes by your shoulders, neck, collarbones, like he’s tasting you for the very first time…

To your delight, he takes some time with your breasts, licking and sucking the hardening nipples, before dragging his tongue down your belly luring a small moan out of you. Your hands lay over your stomach as you watch him sitting back on his toes and exploring your skin with teeth and lips: ankles, calves, thighs until he leans down and wraps his mouth around your exposed and awaiting pussy.

You gasp at the now familiar sensation of his delicious lips on you, but he doesn’t act with the hungry and furious moves he usually ravishes you with. The brush of his tongue on your most sensitive parts it’s like a sweet tease. He’s savoring you and taking his time on doing so. The shift, though different than before, feels somehow even more intense to you and it doesn’t take much longer to coax your ecstasy out of you.

Your whole body pants and trembles through the intense bliss only he can give you while he moves up to press his lips on your breathless ones. The enticing weight of his body over yours, his hot skin burning against yours, his silky tongue tasting like you and him together… Holding him as tightly as you can, you lost track of where you end and where he begins.

Lifting and tilting your hips up against his, you give him the hint of what you want and he promptly allows you to shift the position over, till he’s the one on his back and you’re on top, straddling him. 

Breaking the kiss, you straighten up your back, exposing yourself to him. The way he looks at you… Even though it’s not as predatory as customary, there’s something of adoration in his stare, like he’s amazed by you, like you haven’t done that dozens of times before and he has just seen you for the first time. It makes you feel like the most incredible woman in the world. Your gaze parts from his to follow the slow dance of your fingers down his sweat-slick chest, watching how his muscles move and tense under your touch, how hard he’s breathing, making his ribcage move up and down deeply…

You shift your look back to his face to see his gaze stuck on you. His tongue darts out to lick his lips when you take him with your hands and, after lifting your hips, you guide him to your entrance, soaked in the pleasure he has just brought to you. You both gasp, producing an unison sound, when you descend down his length till he’s fully inside you. You don’t move right away, to physically adjust to him, but also to let yourself take in and adjust to that brand-new feeling that rises in you for being connected to him like that.

Through your parted lips come out shallow breaths, and you’re as fixed on him as he’s on you. The moment you two spend, like you’re getting acquainted to each other all over again, is immeasurable. It’s only when his hands glide up your thighs and his fingers dig into your flesh that you start moving your hips.

Your eyes flutter shut and you guide your hands to his over your thighs as you rock your body in a slow and steady pace, relishing in the feeling of him, allowing the desire to gradually pool down and grow in you. The sensations buzz inside your chest, prompting your heart to beat faster and faster. Your other times with Bucky have been all about seeking the release in all kinds of means to come to that end, but now… You want that, of course… you want that ultimate explosion of pleasure to wash over you, you’re seeking that, too, but it’s so much more. It’s more about feeling him, to let this connection pull you to him and take the pace of your hips against his. 

You intertwine your fingers with his and lean down. Pining his hands above his head, you brush your lips on his parted ones, keeping the rock of your hips. The tiny gasps, the sweet sounds of pleasure coming from both of you are the only sound in the room, since there’s no place for dirty words and witty filthy lines right now. There’s just space for the two of you. For the feeling of him.

And the intensity of it all is turning into a wave inside your fervent sink. You hold his hand even harder and your toes curl as the desire bursts through your body once again, a striking light… head to toe…

As you let out a silent cry, he lets go of your hands only to wrap an arm around your waist and sits up taking you with him. You brace yourself around his neck, and wrap your legs around his waist as he thrusts his hips up. Staring down at him, you see his eyes roaming around your face, like he’s scrutinizing and sticking your features to his memory. As you pant through his thrusts, his lips are parted, setting free his sweet moans. His pace falters and his forehead frowns. A small whisper of your name slips out of his lips before his hips still and his eyes flutter shut. He comes inside you with a strangled moan.

Your pants mingle together, and you hold him to you in a tight embrace, nuzzling your face on the crook of his neck. You have no idea for how long you two stay that way. Deep into the heat of each other, skin to skin, breath to breath, heartbeat to heartbeat… Until he leans back and gently cups your cheeks. Loving the contrast between skin and metal on your skin, you see the blissfulness you’re feeling in you plastered all over his face, as well. And when his lips form a lazy smile, you smile, too.

~~~

The sunlight is peeking through your curtains when Bucky wakes up from one of the best nights of sleep he’s ever had. He takes in a sigh, looking at you, or better, at the back of your head as you still sleep. The impulse of pulling you closer takes the best of him and that’s what he does, using his arm wrapped around your waist to bring your back to his chest to him before nuzzling against the back of your neck. He loves how your body molds to his so perfectly.

You don’t stir from your deep sleep, which is not surprising, since the two of you stayed up until late at night talking about all and nothing, laughing, cuddling, kissing… All of that after he had you in his arms in a way he had never had another woman before… In all his uncountable sex encounters, no matter how intense some of them might’ve been, that kind of connection, of surrender… it was hidden deep inside him, only reserved for you to set free. 

Damn, he’s turning into a sap… but he doesn’t care. Yes, he’s still a bit scared and overwhelmed about all those feelings you elicit in him, yes he might still not fully understand them, but the new feeling the day and night before caused in him is ruling them all right now: hope. Hope that you might be feeling the same. Hope that this might not be that much scary at all and even might work out somehow. Hope that he can have you in his arms like that again, and again, and again…

He doesn’t even notice he’s been peppering small kisses all over your neck and shoulder until you shrug, and he hears the sweet sound of your giggle.

“Good morning,” you say, tilting your head to peek at him.

“Good morning, sweetheart. Sleep well?” He asks, with a grin stuck on his lips.

“Oh, yeah.” You stretch your arms, letting out a big yawn, before shifting position to face him, “You?” You ask, with a beautiful jovial little smile on your face.

He nods, lazily running his hand up and down your back.

“Are you hungry?”

His smile turns into a mischievous smirk, “A bit, yeah,” he answers, rolling on top of you.

You laugh as he grounds his bare hips on yours so you can feel what kind of hunger he’s feeling. He’s completely nude, the way he always sleeps - including with you - while you’re on your underwear and a tank top, “Bucky… I had pancakes in mind -” your words are swallowed by a moan when he sucks over your pulsing point.

“Delicious… “, he rasps, licking his lips. “I like pancakes, too, though. We can get to them later.”

He smiles when he doesn’t hear another protest coming from you as you snaked your hands down his back, and he grinds his erection on your crotch, covered solely by the thin cotton of your underwear. 

It’s the ringtone of your cellphone that steals your attention from him and makes him stall his moves. You aim a sheepishly look at him. Because he has heard it before, he knows it’s the ringtone your Stark phone automatically set to every number related to work and he also knows there’s no such thing as Sunday mornings when it comes to Avengers or even SHIELD, so - not without letting out a displeased growl - he rolls off of you.

You quickly move on the mattress and reach for the phone on the nightstand by your side. Bucky frowns when he spots you freezing at the name that you see on the screen. It also doesn’t slip from his attention how your eyes flicker to him before you sit on the side of the bed, with your back to him.

“Hey… hey, Eddie,” you answer the call with a quiet voice.

A stab cuts through Bucky’s chest.

“N-no, no, I can talk, yeah,” you stammer, still with your back to Bucky, which he’s thankful for, while he uncomfortably shifts on the mattress, not sure if he should stay there or not, “Now?” you yelp, and this time you tilt your head towards Bucky’s direction, before turning around again, “You wanna come over now?”

The air catches on Bucky’s throat and it seems like his heart has stopped altogether. That hopeful little feeling from before turns into cold ice inside him. He tries to not focus on your conversation while he discreetly gets up from your bed and picks up his jeans and boxes from the floor, head towards your bathroom, trying to be as invisible as he actually feels right now.

“Does it have to be now? I- er- ok. Alright, then.” 

He hears you sighing before he shuts the door behind him. After putting on his pants and splashing some water on his face, Bucky stares at his reflection on the mirror. You’ve always been clear about how you felt and what you wanted from him. One month of fucking can’t top ten years of a serious relationship. What the hell was he even thinking?

~~~

You sit at the end of your bed, foot furiously tapping on the floor while you absentmindedly play with your phone from hand to hand, waiting for Bucky to come out of the bathroom. You don’t know why you’re so nervous. It’s kind of awkward to receive a call from your ex while you’re about to have sex with another man, but it’s not like you and Bucky are a thing, right? That much has always been clear from the beginning.

Yes, it was clear… until now. You don’t know what it is, or if you’re dreaming all of that, but you feel like something has shifted, and that something is what’s playing with your nerves right now.

The door opens and you swiftly get up. Bucky comes out of the bathroom and when he sees you standing there, he offers you a smile.

“It was Eddie, he wants to come over to talk. He said it’s urgent,” you blurt out, and bite your lip, holding your phone tightly because you don’t know what else to do.

“I know, sweetheart,” he says gently, “Don’t worry, I’m on my way out.”

For some reason that’s not the answer you were expecting from him, even though you have no idea what you’re expecting from him, anymore, “Bucky, no, that’s not what I- you don’t have to go,-I-I-“ you stammer, sounding like stupid as ever. What the hell are you even saying? You’ve just agreed that Eddie comes over and now what? Expects Bucky to stay while you talk to your ex? What in the world is wrong with you?

“It’s ok, sweetheart…” Like he senses your inner trouble, he comes to you and, putting a soothing hand on your arm, he places a long kiss on your forehead, which makes you close your eyes and breathe. He breaks away, brushing his hand up and down your arm, “We can always do pancakesand everything else some other time,” he keeps that customary playful tone of his and winks.

Again, not exactly what you wanted to hear, whatever that means. You take in a deep breath, before putting on a smile and nodding. That is your deal, after all. What the hell were you even thinking, “Ok, then…” you murmur, “I call you.”

Bucky says nothing to that and for a split moment you see his smile faltering, but it’s quickly wide again before he says goodbye and walks to the living room, puts on his t-shirt and leaves.

~~~

Finally able to breathe when he steps out of your building, Bucky quickly grabs his phone from his pocket and unlocks the screen. He moves, walking fast towards the parking lot where he’s left his bike while he starts typing the text.

“Hey, Amanda…”

~~~

To be continued…


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What's the deal with Eddie and Amanda

A frustrated huff slips between his lips. Wide eyes glued on the plain white ceiling of his bedroom as he tries to silently process the horrifying aberrancy which has just taken place on his bed.

“That’s…wow…” says the female voice beside him, filled with astonishment, “Never, not in a million years, I thought this would be possible.”

His eyes shut for a moment as he sighs, “Can’t exactly disagree on that,” he says, tilting his head to face the owner of the voice, spotting the dumbfounded expression on her face turning into a playfully teasing one as she shifts to lay on her side and lifts her arm to support her head on her hand.

“Call all the scientists… Is Bruce Banner in the house? Cause The Bucky Barnes can’t get it up…” Amanda’s smirk is wide as she nods towards Bucky’s crotch, making him promptly pull the sheet up to his waist, even though he has his underwear on, “I’ve never thought I would live to see that day.”

Neither did he.

Hours ago, when he left your building, he was obsessed with the idea that he needed to do something to put his feelings in check. He thought that maybe the problem was that he had had spent too much of his time with you and that’s why he was so damn confused and if he hooked up with someone else, maybe it would all go away and he would be able to live his life the way he did before you, while you could work whatever you wanted with that guy. You agreed to the punk coming over while he was there in your bed, after the day and night you spent together, it was clear that you’re not done with that clown.

He texted Amanda, because she’s always been a good friend ever since the beginning, when he left behind his brooding self and started living life the way he wanted. A female version of himself, living by the same philosophy as his: pleasure and fun in the first place, no strings attached. He asked her to come to his place later after leaving your place, and of course she was down.

As soon as she stepped into his living room, he lunged on her, however… his up till now reliable friend down there didn’t play along and for the first time ever, even before the serum, he couldn’t get it up, no matter what they both did.

He’s not embarrassed or anything like that. Frustrated, though? Of course he is. And his frustration lays on the fact that it all just felt wrong… misplaced. It didn’t feel right… and the more he thinks of it, he realizes that the real problem was it didn’t feel like you. And it frustrates even further that he felt dirty - not in a good way of dirty- but as if he were betraying someone…You… Himself… Both. Which is damn ridiculous if he’s going to be honest with himself. You two were never exclusive, he never wanted that and neither did you.

Damn, he’s fucked.

And that’s what has led him and Amanda to where they are now, laying on his bed, both on their underwear, having a conversation he never thought he would have.

“Alright now,” she cocks a brow at him, “I know there’s absolutely nothing wrong with me,” with a smug look on her face she looks down and gestures something like a reverence over her body, “So spit it out, what’s wrong with you?” She tilts her chin towards him.

“I don’t know,” he sighs, looking back at the ceiling.

A light kick on his leg makes his face snap back at her, “Bullshit.” Her eyes roll, “First you spend weeks without reaching out, then, on a Sunday fucking morning you text me, saying it’s urgent and you need me so you can check something. You know I’m always up to check something,” She winks, smirking briefly, “And now? This,” Amanda twists her lips and looks down to his center before shooting him a firm gaze and a just as firm command, “Talk.”

He runs a harsh hand over his face before deciding that he might as well talk, “You’re right,” he turns to the side to face her, “Yes, I guess the problem is me. I feel like… like there’s something changing inside me-”

“Wait,” she interrupts him, eyes widening, “It’s not some alien shit, is it?”

Bucky laughs at how she recoils away from him, “I wished… but no, dumbass,” he snorts, used to that kind of exchange with her.

“What?” She lets out a laugh and comes closer to him again, “You Avengers mess with some pretty weird stuff. But alright, sorry, please continue,” she composes herself to listen to him.

Bucky bites his cheek, pondering from a moment where he should start from, “Well, you know all about the way I’m used to living my life and my relationships right?”

She shrugs, nodding her head, “Sure.”

“Just fun, which for me always meant just sex,” he says, “No attachments, the more the merrier, no rules…Actually, there was always just one rule-”

“No romance,” Amanda smiles, “Which, by the looks of it, you’re the one who broke the one rule you had.” She flicks a finger on his chin with a small smirk on her lips.

Bucky huffs and lays on his back again, brushing both hands on his face before crossing his fingers over his eyes, “Yeah… I mean… I don’t know. I don’t know anything anymore…”

“It’s Y/N, right?”

That makes him uncover his widened eyes and glance back at her, “How did you know?”

“It all makes sense now.” She sports a cocky smile as she shifts on the mattress to a sitting position, “Me and a few others used to see you regularly, then, all of a sudden, it all stopped by the time you took her to the bar the other night, remember? You were celebrating she had just gotten her promotion, I think?” she squints, “Which leads us to the party last Friday… You might not recall I was there because you had your lovey-dovey eyes just for her.” She keeps the teasing smile on her face as she lifts her knees up and wraps her arms around them, looking down at him.

“Fuck,” he curses, sitting on the mattress as well and resting his elbows on his lifted knees. He didn’t know it was all that obvious. First Steve had his suspicions, then Nat, now Amanda? There’s no point in denying, “You know I always loved women, really, really loved women, but I never thought I would wish to settle for just one… But now I have feelings for her and they are all over,” he gestures around his own chest with a grimace on his face, “I don’t know what to do with that and she’s still pretty caught up to her ex, which makes me sick in my stomach, and I just wanna hold her tight so that jerk can never come near her, ever again,” he growls through clenched teeth. Just the mere thought that at this time you might’ve back together with that clown… he wants to rip his own skin off.

“Oh… wow…” she laughs before squinting at him, “But What makes you think that she’s still caught up to her ex?”

He puffs, “We’ve been talking a lot during the times we spent together, and she was always clear about not being over the break-up.” He shrugs before a small smile eases its way to his lips without him even noticing, “Last night, we had a wonderful night together, I think- I think I got her on a date before that. Can you imagine me on a date? Daytime, parks and all?”

“Definitely can’t,” Amanda agrees, with an amused smirk on her lips.

The smile on Bucky’s face fades before he starts talking again, “And then, this morning, her ex called and wanted to come over. She agreed and I left, that’s why I called you,” his lips tighten, “I wanted to see if this would go away, if I hook up with someone else all these feelings would be over. We know how well it worked out,” he gestures to the unbothered lower part of him, before staring mindlessly ahead.

“What? You’re saying you just wanted to use me like that? That’s rude.”

His face snaps to Amanda’s again to see her gasping and placing a hand on her chest.

Both pause for a moment before a matching pair of laughs bursts through their lips. He knows she’s one of the most carefree persons in the world and that’s why he’s comfortably talking to her like that.

“Anyway, she’s probably back together with the guy right now,” Bucky takes in a shuddering breath, when the laughing halts. 

“Bucky,” Amanda tilts her head, frowning at him, “Just because she received a call and agreed to talk to the guy doesn’t necessary mean she’s back together with him. It’s a possibility that she wasn’t expecting that and didn’t know what to say or do. By what you just told me, the date was really special, didn’t you feel a connection from her end?”

Bucky thinks for a moment before answering. He did feel something different from you. It’s always fun to spend time with you, to have mind-blowing sex with you… But this time? He had really felt you, whatever that means. He did feel a different kind of connection from your end. But then there was the next morning, the call… he doesn’t know what to think anymore.

He puts on a tightened smile for Amanda and shrugs, “I don’t know…But it’s just a crush, it’ll pass,” he brushes off.

She hums and nods, “Ok… alright…” she says, before placing a hand on his shoulder, “Bucky, you know you’re like an icon between us girls, right?” She beams.

Bucky laughs quietly as an answer.

“Do you know why we all love you so much?” Amanda asks.

With his elbow on his lifted knee, Bucky supports his head with his hand on his cheek, facing her, “By all means, keep talking,” he chuckles.

“You’re honest,” she says, “Never once lied to us about what you wanted and it makes us all comfortable to express what we really want, too. It’s hard out there for a woman who just wants to get off and be happy you know?” She lets out a puff and roll her yes to the ceiling, “But you were always there for us not just with a hot body and amazing skills in bed,” she blatantly says with a cheeky smile on her lips, making Bucky laugh and shake his head, “but also honesty and respect.” Her face turns a bit more serious as she looks at him with a thoughtful expression.

Bucky knows where this is going, but as much as it may be hard for him to admit what he needs to do, he remains silent and allows her to get there.

“Now what you need is to be honest with yourself,” she says precisely what Bucky was expecting her to say, “Deep down, you know exactly what you’re feeling and what you want. You just need to listen to what your feelings are trying to tell you and accept whatever it is, being honest with yourself like you always are with everyone else.”

Well, if being honest with himself is just what he needs, then he doesn’t need anything else or anymore time to understand what those feelings are. He already knows. He does for a while now. He was just mistaking denial for confusion.

Bucky lets out a breathy smile at his friend, “I’ve never taken you for a feelings advisor.”

“You’ll be surprised about how diverse my skills actually are, Bucky Barnes.” She winks, lifting a leg up and dropping her head backwards to put on a pose, “But I guess that ship has sailed now,” she jokingly pouts and shrugs before jumping off the bed and starting picking up her clothes from the floor.

“I’m sorry I made you come all this way for nothing,” Bucky says, standing up to put on his clothes as well, “Can I at least offer you a beer or something?”

“Nah,” she waves him off, “Don’t worry. I’ll go check if Black Widow is around… we got pretty close at the party last Friday, you know?” She smiles widely and bites her lip as she pulls up her jeans and zip it up.

“Oh…” Bucky’s eyes widen before he smirks while putting on a shirt, having his pants already on, “What a pair… She’ll eat you alive if you let her, though,” he warns.

“That’s what I’m counting on.” She wiggles her eyebrows, now fully dressed and already sauntering towards the door.

They laugh and chat briefly as Bucky walks her to the way out, opening the door for her.

After stepping outside, she pulls him for a hug, “You’re one of the good ones, Bucky. Y/n is a lucky woman and if she doesn’t see that, I feel bad for her,” she whispers in his ear, before placing a kiss on his cheek.

~~~

You keep the big cup of coffee on your lips for longer than necessary, quietly peeking at the man sitting on the armchair before in your living room, as you sit on your sofa.

He’s just as quiet, with his own cup of coffee in his hands, glancing around the place he helped buying and decorating.

“It looks different,” he comments after a little while.

You clear your throat, placing your cup on the center table, “I didn’t change anything.”

“Yeah, I know… but it’s different. Just like you are.”

“You said that before, Eddie, but I really don’t know what to tell you about that,” you snap and he flinches at the annoyance that comes out with your words.

He says nothing while his lips tighten, and his shoulders shrink into himself.

You take in a deep breath. You don’t even know why you are so annoyed at him… or better, you do know, but he’s not the real reason for your annoyance, you’re more frustrated with yourself, with how you dealt with the situation with Bucky earlier. It was only automatic when you said yes to Eddie coming over, even if you’re not sure that’s what you really wanted.

“I’m sorry.” You shake your head, while brushing your forehead, “You know I’m not my gentlest on mornings,” you chuckle, trying to lighten up the mood.

His tight smile grows into a wide one and he nods, “Yeah, I know.”

“So,” you grab your cup of coffee again, “I assume you’re here to talk about the condo, like you said at the party, right?” You hold the cup like a shield between the two of you. The subject is sensitive to you since you’re not sure how much you are willing to let go of that place you chose so carefully and invested so much of you in it.

He stares at you for a second, like he’s pondering an answer, he sighs when he seems to have found one, “Yes and no.”

You tilt your head as if asking him for clarification.

“Yes, because it somehow involves this place and what it means to us,” he says, looking nervous as he, just like you, holds his cup tightly. The little weird feeling at the word us coming from his lips makes you shift on your seat, “But the thing is…” He breathes before placing the cup on the table and standing up.

You lean back on your seat and watch with rounding eyes as he crosses the room and sits down beside you. Not a word comes out of your lips as he takes the cup from your hands and puts it next to his on the table. You still say nothing and just watch as he takes both of your hands into his.

“The real reason I’m here is you. And me,” he tightens the hold in your hands, staring into your eyes, “Because I love you.”

Your jaw drops. That’s not at all what you expected to hear from him in that moment. Not even close.

“Oh-“

“Please, just – I know you must have a lot to say and to ask, but just let me get this off my chest,” he pleads, when you were about to say whatever you were gonna say. “I know that having me coming here to tell you that might not make sense to you since I’m the one who ended things and now I may have lost my chance with you, but let me explain, or at least try to, why I made that decision,” he rambles, almost out of breath.

You regard him for a moment. His hands are cold around yours while a droplet of sweat falls down his face. He stares intensely and beggingly at you, “Ok,” you concede in a restraint voice, nodding for him to go on.

He gulps down before starting to talk again, “You know you were my first serious girlfriend, my first on everything. I feel like I’ve discovered life by your side, I loved and cherished every moment we spent together, every dream we dreamed and accomplished together…” He lets out a breathy smile, “College, our work, then this place…” he speaks with a nostalgic contemplative tone as if he’s reliving memories on his mind.

You take in a deep breath, just listening to him, taking the words in. The memories are there for you, too, like a silent movie playing in the back of your head. You can’t help the lump growing in your throat. 

His expression shifts to something apologetic and sad when he looks back at you, “But, when we crossed the ten years mark…to me it was like we reached a point where it just didn’t make sense anymore for us to be just boyfriend and girlfriend any longer, like the obvious thing to do next was taking a step forward.”

“I’ve never pressured you for anything, Eddie,” you say, sternly, pulling your hands away while you clear your throat to erase the break in your voice.

“I know, I know, but I did,” he quickly adds, reaching for your hands again. “I was pressuring myself and at the same time, I just… I didn’t feel ready to take that step forward,” he looks away from you, “So I ended taking a step back, instead. At first, I put distance between us, I know I did that.”

A flash of the last months with him passes through your head. You noticed he was different. You didn’t have sex for almost a year, for God’s sake. You tried talking to him so many times but it was to no avail.

He turns a frantic gaze to you again, “And then I thought that maybe the right thing for us was a new path, to expand our horizons or whatever, that maybe we needed to experience new things apart…” He huffs, shaking his head as if he’s frustrated at himself, “It felt right at that point, but these last few months, I put my thoughts together, and the only conclusion I came to is that I love you and there’s no life for me away from you and I wanna make it right with you.”

Your heart races and the swelling in your throat grows bigger by the second. You swallow down the heavy feeling in your stomach, “God, Eddie… I wasn’t expecting that, I-” A thought pops in your mind and makes you frown and pull back your hands from him, “What about Chloe? I saw the way you two were together at the party.”

He’s taken aback by your question, but he nods, biting his lips before speaking, “After we broke up and I started at SHIELD, she and I got close, we started flirting with each other. I’m not gonna lie, it felt new, exciting.” He gulps, “But nothing had happened…until your party. I- I saw you with Bucky Barnes.” His jaw clenches and he stops talking, probably waiting for you to say something.

Your gaze shifts away for a moment, but you harden your face, deciding to say nothing about that yet.

“Anyway,” he resumes when you remain silent, “I went to her place once we left the tower, we had a few drinks and ended up kissing, but we didn’t go further. I swear, I couldn’t…” His chest heaves and his face scrunches up in a grimace, “Just the thought of someone else is weird.”

“Oh…” The time you spent next to him taught you to realize most of the times he’s lying to you, and you know he isn’t now. You believe him. Even if you don’t know what to do with that. 

“What about you and Barnes?” He asks in a quiet voice, shy even.

What about you and Bucky? That’s a good question, alright. You breathe in an encouraging intake of air. He seems to have been honest with you and you wanna give him the same thing, “I’ve been spending time with him. We have some sort of a deal,” you start picking your nails, “But it’s not serious or romantic, we’re just… spending time together.” You shrug, leaving implied what the deal of you and Bucky consists of.

He raises his eyebrows before he drops his gaze. You see through the shift on his face that you don’t need to be more explicit. 

“A deal…I see…” he whispers before lifting his eyes to you, “Do you wanna make it more than that, though?” He asks in a quiet and fearful voice.

That question would be a lot easier for you to answer a few days ago, but what slides out of your mouth surprises you, “I- I don’t know…”

The day you spent in Brooklyn comes to your mind, the night you had together, the way Bucky looked and smiled at you… For you it was not like the other times, and you suspect that maybe it’s been the same for Bucky, too. It was not just sex, as cheesy as it may sound… It was something else, something more. Something that makes your heart tight right now, something that makes you not throw yourself into Eddie’s arms like you would have surely done before.

And yet, you can’t help but to come to the conclusion that all of that is only assumption. That is all uncertain and unknown. While, with Eddie, now that he is here, telling you what he’s telling you, there seems to be a steadier promise of security, certainty, of familiarity. 

“It’s my fault,” Eddie says with confidence, nodding his head after a few moments quiet, “I’m the one who let you go, who made you believe we didn’t matter to me, who didn’t treat you like you deserved. But I’ll make it right now. I’m ready.”

Your eyes widen and you let out a small gasp when he slides to his knees in front of you, “Eddie?”

“Y/n,” he breathes, taking your hands into his, staring intently into your eyes, “I want you back and I want to redeem myself for the rest of my life for leaving you and for not making you as happy as I know I could on the time spent together,” he brings one hand to his pocket, taking out the little velvet box from there.

He opens the lid and your eyes drop, dumbfoundedly, to the solitaire diamond ring in front of you.

“Will you give us the chance to take our lives back on track and make it better?” He asks as your stare snaps back at him, “I don’t wanna throw away our ten years and everything we accomplished and dreamed together. I’m ready for the next step now.” He licks his drying lips before asking the question, “Will you marry me?”

~~~

To be continued…


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What a day!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I suck at keeping an update schedule and I'm sorry for taking so long. Thank you for your patience and I hope you like this one. Please, keep in mind I'm trying to write a romantic comedy, lol!

“Will you marry me?”

Those words replay in your head while your limbs go slack. Eddie kneels before you, diamond ring in hands and an expectant look on his face. You just stare at him, unsure of what to say or even what to feel among the huddle of sensations inside you… until one of them suppresses the others and your parted lips shut right before your jaw clenches. Anger.

“Are you fucking kidding me, Eddie?”

Completely taken aback by your snap, the man before you flinches and his shoulders drop while the little box shuts when his hand does.

“I-I…” he tries.

“No,” you cut him off, “Seriously,” you swiftly get up from the sofa, and he follows, “You broke up with me after one year or so without properly touching me or even talking to me,” you scoff, shaking your head, “And now you come here and fucking propose after months apart? Fucking propose, Eddie?” You repeat yourself, narrowing your eyes at him, “What the hell are you even thinking? That I would swoon and run to your arms just like that?” You snap your fingers, “That I was here just waiting for this moment?”

The man seems completely startled and lost in front of you, but in your outrage, you don’t find in you to care one bit, “I know I messed up,” he finally speaks, “I know it’s all my fault, I was lost, but this?” he lifts the little box, “This is it, I’m not lost anymore.”

You sigh, running your hand over your face, you put on a calmer voice as the anger guiding your actions and words so far starts subduing, “Listen, I was crushed when you broke up with me, I should’ve seen it coming, maybe I should’ve tried harder when I noticed the distance between us-”

“That’s not true, baby -”

“Eddie,” you raise a hand to interrupt him, “Let’s try to be honest to each other here for once. If there’s something I’ve learned is that we can never do wrong by being honest.”

There’s a crease between his eyebrows as he takes in your words until he breathes in and nods.

“We weren’t ok by the end of our relationship, this time apart made me see that much clearly now. I may have turned a blind eye to it all, but that’s the truth. We weren’t communicating, we were just going with the flow, and that’s on us. Both of us.” Your lips tighten and he keeps his attention on you, “But now…Maybe you didn’t notice or maybe you’re the one turning a blind eye for it now, but don’t you see the timing for this proposal is, in the least, a little off?”

“What? Why?” He tilts his face while the crease on his forehead deepens.

You let out a breath and walk to the sofa. He follows you and you both sit down again. A true and honest conversation with Eddie has been long overdue and you don’t think it’s time to keep postponing it, “We are broken up for months and you’re proposing to me not even two whole days after seeing me close to someone else… after trying to hook up with a woman you’d been flirting and not being able to go through…”

The bone on his throat bobs as he gulps and looks down to his lap.

“You may say this was enough to make you see you were wrong about the breakup and for distancing yourself, but this can’t be enough for a decision like that.” You nod towards the little box in his hand, “Those four months maybe haven’t been what you expected to be for you…And to be honest, they weren’t exactly what I expected to be for me, either,” you falter, but keep your head straight.

His head snaps back towards you and he just observes you for a brief moment, like he’s reading you anew, “What do you mean?” he asks quietly. 

You’re not sure what you should answer to that when not even you have a clear understanding of what this time apart really meant for you. Your lips tighten before you speak, “You keep saying I’ve changed, maybe I did, I don’t know.” You shrug. “All I know is that I can’t accept your proposal. For the sake of us, Eddie. We can’t right the wrongs of our relationship just jumping to that,” you add, hoping that he would understand you.

His head drops and he takes in a shuddering breath, making your heart heavy. Your hands turn into nervous fists on your lap. He is important to you, there’s no way to deny that. Weeks ago it’s possible you wouldn’t even think twice or even consider the problems in your relationship before accepting the proposal with all your heart. But now, like you said, something has changed, something that made you realize all the problems in the path you two drove your relationship to.

Not to say that, in the deepest of your mind, there’s a chanting of another man’s name, a quiet but persistent echo. Still, you keep it aside for later deliberation. Now you focus on Eddie, the man you planned to spend a life with and who is before you, offering you to do just that and hearing a rejection from you.

His eyes close before he looks back at you, “Ok,” he nods, “I’m not saying I agree with all of that, but I accept your decision,” he sighs and you give him a small smile, “This is yours, though.” He takes your hands and puts the little box in it, shutting it so you can hold it.

Your mouth falls open while your eyes rounds, “Eddie, no, I can’t-”

“Please,” he urges, dragging himself closer to you, “This is yours. It doesn’t change by the fact you said no. Regardless if we stay together or not, I want you to have it, please,” he pleads, keeping his hand around yours, squeezing the little box tight in your hold. 

The abandonment etched on his face is what makes you swallow dry and give him a small nod while your chest heavies, “Ok,” you whisper, “But- but it doesn’t change anything, Eddie,” you make sure to add. 

He smiles a breathy smile and withdraws his hand from yours, letting you keep the box while you pull your hand, “I know, it’s ok… Can I ask you one more thing, though?”

“Alright,” you agree.

“You said you don’t wanna jump to marriage, that it can’t right the wrongs of our relationship. But…is there a chance for us at something in the middle? I mean, is there a chance for us to work things out?”

Your eyebrows dart high on your forehead. The question causes a cold pinch in your stomach. You think about all the time you spent together, all the hopes and dreams, the struggles, the good and the bad… Right now, if you dig into yourself and your feelings, he may not feel like the obvious choice for you, but there was a time, not so long ago, that he was and it felt right. You have to respect that, don’t you?

“Listen Eddie,” you speak softly, after clearing your throat, “Maybe we can start by seeing each other more frequently?” Your forehead scrunches after you present your offer, not sure how he’s going to take that. “We can keep talking, not holding back on things we have to say to each other, being honest… We can try to be friends for now, or something like that? And then we see how it all goes?”

“Friends?” Eddie snickers, “We were never friends.” He lets out a skeptical snort.

You shrug, “We can try… I don’t know… All I know is I’m not ready for more now and I need some time to put my thoughts together, and I think you need that, too.”

After just looking at you for a second, he puts on a small smile and covers your hand with his, “Alright. All the time you need. But now, just… let me…”

You watch when he leans over and moves his lips close to yours. After placing a hand on the nape of your neck, he waits for a reaction of some sort, but when you offer none and just stares at him, he kisses you.

Your eyes shut after a few seconds. It feels weird and familiar at the same time if that even makes sense. There’s a longing behind the gesture, a longing that makes your heart beat a bit faster… An urge grows in you, a tingle, a crucial need to…

Pulling away, you quickly turn your face to the other side before covering your mouth with you forearm and setting free the sneeze that was bubbling inside you. 

You sniff and, with a frown, turn to a comically taken aback Eddie, “Alright, if we’re going to be around and honest with each other from now on, I’m sorry but you’ll have to get rid of that damn perfume.”

“Really? But you loved that perfume.”

Your lips form a thin line and you raise an eyebrow.

Realization dawns on his face, “Oh…I guess you didn’t.”

~~~

After promising you the perfume wouldn’t be a problem anymore, Eddie leaves with the compromise of calling you for a coffee soon. You realize you two never really talked about the condo and you wonder if that has anything to do with him being sure you two would end up together again.

If that’s the case, you’re definitely not as sure as he is. And it’s an odd feeling, not being sure about Eddie anymore. Even when things were bad, you were always sure about him.

Finding yourself alone again, you drop your body on your couch. You’re damn exhausted. Tilting your head to the side, your gaze meets the little box over the center table. You reach for it and open the lid. Without the adrenaline from before, you take your time to observe it.

You take in the thin straight white gold band that leads to the halo which holds the round and small brilliant cut diamond. You smile as you can tell he was thinking of you when he picked that ring. It’s simple and beautiful, something that wouldn’t attract much attention to your hand, like most of your jewelry.

Eddie has never been that great with making conversation or opening up with you- and maybe a few other actions - but he always knew exactly what to gift you. He has always been thoughtful with your taste and personality.

Without thinking much, you put on the ring. You sprawl your hand before you and have to acknowledge that it fits perfect. You wonder how much it would make you feel special not much time ago…

Letting out a groan, you drop the little box on the floor in favor to reach for your phone in your jeans’ pocket. Your thumb hovers the name that’s been nagging at the back of your mind this whole time. Without giving yourself much time to think, you press on the name.

Bucky “Soft Tongue” Barnes. 

A little smile curls your lips. You really need to change that.

The ringing tone resounds in your ear as your breathing quickens. Why just the mere thought of talking to Bucky is making you so damn nervous? You wait… and wait. When it goes to the voicemail, you quickly hang up.

That’s the very first time Bucky doesn’t pick up when you call. The small frown between your eyebrows softens at the thought that he’s probably sleeping. It’s Sunday after all.

You huff while you hold your phone against your chest with one hand and digs your fingers into your hair with the other. You stare at the white ceiling above you… Shit… what the hell are you even doing. Calling Bucky right after being proposed by Eddie? And why in the world does your mind keep insisting on the thought of Bucky and you feel the need to talk all about that morning with him, to listen to whatever opinion he might have on that, or anything else he might have to say?

And why does your heart jump so funny when you remember his face… that stupid perfect face… and his smile…

Fuck…

That probably has something to do with the last couple of days you spent with him. First, he was your rock at your party, making it easier for you to have fun, and then taking care of your drunk ass. Then the next day at Brooklyn… and the night after that. It did feel different… maybe more intimate…

But it’s just an impression… The man has always made himself crystal clear – which, by the way, so did you - that what you had was sex, incredible and mind-blowing, of course, but just sex. He has never wanted anything other than that, and you’re definitely sure Bucky Barnes isn’t cut out for what comes in a relationship beyond the sex.

Shifting your gaze to the ring on your finger as you still hold your phone against you, your relationship with Eddie comes to your mind, how you always did everything together, the decisions regarding life, work and everything else were taken together, the dreams and growth, the stability and familiarity…You also think about the arguments… the silence and distance, the loss of the spark and the excitement of being together, the times you ended up erasing your likes and dislikes to avoid confrontation…

With a will of its own, your mind then navigates to Bucky again and what you had together this last month. You can’t imagine him, in all his glorious bachelor lifestyle, engaging in a relationship like that, with all the strings and emotional weight that surely come with it and, by your experience, ends up killing all the fun. Do you still want a relationship like that, though? Of course there’s its positive side, but what about all the negatives that stubbornly resist any relationship?

Also… seriously? Bucky’s the first man who’s nice to you after your break-up… The second you’ve had sex with. Ever. You can’t be so pathetic to the point of having a no strings attached relationship with a guy and start thinking, because he’s nice and kind to you, because you suddenly feel like you shared a special weekend with him, that it could lead to something different than that. 

You groan as it frustrates you to no end the thought that you’re so weak that maybe you can’t be your own person and perhaps need to always be engaged in some kind of relationship or emotionally attached to someone, no matter if you know them for ten years or a month.

If Bucky were there, he would probably say the right thing, about how you’re overthinking all of it and you’re just a couple of rabbits fucking majestically and enjoying each other’s company. He would also say that you two were too smart to trade that for something as boring and dull as love. A loose smile twitches your lips. 

You don’t need to fall for him just because you’re having sex… Just because he’s the most handsome and sexy man you’ve ever seen… Because he’s amazing in bed, respectful, kind, smart, funny, strong, thoughtful…

Jesus…

Immersed in your conflicting feelings and thoughts of Bucky, of Eddie, of yourself… you have no idea of when you end up falling asleep on your couch, but the ding of your doorbell wakes you up in a startle, you squint and brush your hand over your face before reaching for your phone that has fallen over the carpet. Your eyes widen at the clock. You’ve been sleeping for a little more than a couple of hours. As the doorbell rings again, you spot five missed calls. All of them from Bucky. And after swiftly getting up and rushing to the door, that’s the man you find behind it.

“Hey-”

You don’t even let him start talking before pulling him in into a hug, circling your arms around his neck and nestling your head against him. You don’t even know why you’re doing this, but you love the warmth of him wrapping you up, and you love that he holds you back immediately, without questions or further talking.

You let out a deep sigh, before leaning away and smiling at him, which he mimics.

“Hi,” you say.

“Hi,” he says back, gazing at you with a distinguish softness in his eyes and a small but beautiful smile on his lips. “I saw your missed call, I tried to call you back a few times and when you didn’t answer I thought maybe I should drop by,” he says.

“Good,” you breathe and turn, taking his hand and guiding him inside as he shuts the door with his foot behind him.

He pulls your hand, making you stop on your track and face him again. The softness from before gives place to a nervous little frown on his face, “I- I need to talk to you -” 

”Eddie proposed to me.” You don’t know if it’s the little tremble on his voice, his very presence, or the fact that they were choking in your throat, but the information spills from your mouth unannounced. 

The words catch on Bucky’s throat as he inhales sharply. He takes a step back at the same time his rounded eyes drop to your hand, which is still laced on his. The blood seems to vanish from his face.

You follow his stare and that’s when your eyes ball out because you realize you’re still wearing the ring. Acting by impulse, you take your hand away from his and move to pull the ring off your finger, “I-I didn’t say yes,” you quickly clarify, but the damn ring doesn’t budge even with your harsh attempts of taking it off and a desperate feeling lodges at the pit of your stomach because goddammit it had fit perfectly moments ago. You groan in sheer frustration, looking down and pulling even more forcefully, “I was just trying it on-I-“.

Gentle hands cover yours. Your mouth snaps shut and your hasty ministrations halts. You look up and take in the sight of his eyes on you. They are softer now and it calms you down, just like the light massaging circles he draws on your skin. A caress. While you keep your eyes on each other, he twirls the ring, which now moves with ease, and ever so slowly, he pulls it through the length of your finger, till it’s completely off of you.

Holding it with his thumb and index finger, he observes the shiny little jewel between the two of you, his expression unreadable, before he offers it back to you. 

Like waking up from a daze, you’re quick to accept it and place it on the center table at your side.

“I told him this wasn’t the time to think about that…” you say, your voice coming out timid as you fidget with your fingers.

Bucky remains quiet, putting his hands in his pockets, that same unreadable expression still on his face. He nods, though, for you to continue, “We talked a lot. He asked if we still had a chance and I said we should start off by seeing each other more, like friends or something like that, and then see what happens.” You purse your lips.

“Oh…” he mumbles. 

You wait for him to say anything else, but he doesn’t. He just seems lost for speech and that’s news for you.

“It was a hectic morning,” you let out a nervous little laugh, “I called you because I kind of wanted to talk to you… I mean…What do you think?” You bite your cheek.

“Of what?” He blinks.

“All of that… The proposal, my answer…” your voice fails.

Bucky clears his throat before he nods, “Well… what more did he tell you exactly?”

You then pull him to sit on the sofa with you and you tell him everything Eddie had said right there on that same sofa, trying hard to not let any detail out. For some reason knowing what Bucky would have to say about that is all that matters to you right now. 

“Hold on.” Bucky holds up both his hands as a crease appears between his eyebrows, “Are you telling me he decided to break up with you without even trying to work things out, really talk to you about whatever shitty crises he was going through and then comes here after four months of radio silence, right after seeing you close to me and after he tried to hook up with someone else?” He scoffs, shaking his head before getting up, turning his back to you.

You watch, still on your seat, as he runs a hand over his face, before you get up and puts a hand on his back, you’ve never seen him that agitated, “Bucky…”

He swiftly turns to you, gesticulating with his arms and hands as he speaks, “Sounds like this guy’s single life wasn’t exactly what he thought it would be and the moment he realized maybe it was going a lot nicer for you, he decides he better jump in again, that he’s ready and shit? Sounds like he still doesn’t know what he really wants and is taking a shot at you like some impulsive and jealous asshole. Fuck this guy,” he spits as his cheeks flush red.

His reaction takes you off course for a bit. He’s been always honest and straightforward with you, but you didn’t expect such an emotion outrage from him. You talked about Eddie many times with him and it was never like that, “I-I… yeah, I know, Bucky. I’m not blind to that, which is what I told him after he proposed.”

“And yet, you’re talking about starting to see him again,” he states and if he wanted to sound like an accusation you didn’t know, but it sure sounds like it. 

“Bucky, it’s ten years,” you argue, not sure why this seems to be escalating to, not a fight, but at least a heated debate, “I can’t just erase this time and what it meant to me. That’s a great part of my whole adult life. We lived together, did everything together. I loved him. You have no idea what it’s like to have a relationship like that.” 

His jaw clenches, before he gives his back to you. His head drops and he puts his hands on both sides of his waist.

You shift on your feet, wondering whether you have maybe crossed a line there. This kind of heat up interaction with Bucky is news and completely strange to you. But when you’re about to say something, you hear the low groan that come out of his mouth.

“A man who won’t even eat your pussy…” he shakes his head, utter exasperation on his voice.

Your jaw drops before a small gasp slips through your lips. You don’t take it as an offense or anything like that, because when he said it, it wasn’t in an accusing tone like before, let alone aggressive. It’s just like he’s genuinely confused by why you would have such consideration for a man who wouldn’t go down on you.

“Bucky,” you let out a breathy laugh, “What the hell is going on with you?” You tilt your head while he still has his back to you, “If I didn’t know you better I would say you were jealous.”

His head snaps up at your comment and he turns to face you. His lower lip is trapped between his teeth. There’s something of anguish on his eyes and the amusement in your face drops at his demeanor.

“That’s because I am,” he affirms, short of breath.

Your eyes widen for a second before you frown and your head shakes lightly with confusion, “What?”

“I’m jealous, ok? I’m jealous, that’s it.” His face reddens even harder as his voice raises and he gesticulates, indignation pouring out from him, “Your ex is a douche who didn’t appreciate what he had and now decides he can come here and fuck up with what we have?”

A shocked breath comes out of your lips, “What we have? Bucky, you were the first one to be sure our deal wouldn’t be exclusive, and that was fine by me. I talked about Eddie with you countless times and it was fine, I don’t get why you’re saying and acting like that now.”

“Yeah, I know all of that, but things change, I guess…shit.” He curses and covers his eyes with both hands and takes a few breaths before looking at you again, “I didn’t want to tell you like that,” he says in a softer way right before he clenches his teeth again, “But that jerk had to come here first…”

“Didn’t want to tell me what exactly, Bucky?” you question.

He looks at you for a second, the agitation slowly leaving his features before he walks over you and takes you by the hand to guide you to sit on the sofa again, “Listen,” he says, as you sit beside him, intently listening to him, “It’s been some time I’ve been feeling kind of weird towards you. Us, I mean.” He gulps, “A kind of feeling that confused the hell out of me for quite some time.”

“Ok…” Your heart races in your chest, but you still have no idea where this is going, so you decide to not say anything else and let him talk so maybe you can get a better grasp on what the hell is going on.

“You know this morning, when you picked up Eddie’s phone and said he could come over?”

Your eyes move away from his for a second, since you’re not exactly proud of the fact that you did tell Eddie to come over when he was still there, but Bucky said it himself it was ok… clearly it was not.

“We had just had an amazing day and night together and I was even more confused when I got out of here,” he continues, ”I needed to check something, to fully understand what was happening, so I called Amanda.”

“Oh… really?” A piercing ache bites on your chest at the information. Are you the one who’s jealous now? “Were you with her when I called you? That’s why you didn’t pick up?” You ask, trying not to let your unexpected feeling show, but you’re not sure whether you’re succeeding or not. 

“Yeah,” he admits with a small nod.

The answer makes you flinch on your seat, “And you wanna talk to me about jealousy,” you scoff, crossing your arms in front of you, the annoyance slipping through your tone, “That’s really funny, Bucky, don’t you think?”

“But… I-I,” he seems lost for a moment, “Listen, I’m not gonna lie to you. I’ never have, not gonna start now. I called her with the idea of having sex with her, yeah. Ever since I met you I hadn’t slept with anyone else and I thought that maybe that was the reason I was feeling so weird-“

“Wait…Really? You hadn’t been with anyone else?” You interrupt him, since the information piques your interest. Now that he mentions it, you have a vague memory of someone telling you that exact same thing at the party while you were too shitfaced to process the info. What an irony that the someone was precisely Amanda. 

“No, and I still haven’t because I couldn’t even get it up,” he discloses with pure exasperation.

“What?” You lift both your eyebrows, “You couldn’t get it up?” You practically squeal, “Is that… is that even possible?” You reach over his forehead to check his temperature, “Are you ok?”

Taking your hand in his, he lets out a chuckle, but there’s no humor behind it, “I called her because I thought that if I hooked up with someone else, maybe things would be clearer or whatever. And they did.” He huffs, nodding down to his lower half, “The jerk down there decided to throw on my face something I think I’ve known for a while but had no idea what to make of it.”

He pauses and takes a few breathes, looking down as if he needs to gather some courage and you squeeze his hand, trying to provide him what he needs to keep talking. When he looks back at you, there’s a small reassuring smile on your face waiting for him and the next words he says bursts out from his lips.

“I think I’m in love with you.”

Silence settles in the room. You still have your hand on his while he stares at you expectantly. You stare back at him. Something starts bubbling in your chest. It grows bigger and bigger till it runs up your throat and spurts from your lips in the form of a laugh. A big and hysterical one. 

You let go of his hand to lightly push him on his shoulder, “Oh my God, Bucky,” you say, as tears form in the corner of your eyes of how much you’re laughing, “Only you can come up with a story like that to make me laugh now.” You point at him, “You finding out you’re in love with me because of a limp-dick.” You laugh even harder.

It’s when you move to tap on his shoulder again that you focus on his face to see the lack of amusement on it. He has a sad and almost embarrassed gaze fixed on you as his lips form a frown.

The laugh dies on your lips.

“Oh…” you breathe, while realization finally comes to you, “You’re not kidding.”

He gives you a tight-lip smile.

“Oh…” you say again, any other word vanishing from your mind as you shift and lean back on your seat, staring ahead and away from him. Bucky has just said he thinks he’s in love with you.

Bucky…

In love with you…

“I know this wasn’t the ideal way and time to tell you, I know,” he starts talking in a hurry beside you, but you keep staring ahead, unable to move from your position, as a whole new bubble starts taking form in your chest and throat, taking over your senses, “And I know you didn’t expect that from me, hell, I certainly wasn’t expect that myself, but it just happened and I was confused, but I’m not anymore, I know what I’m feeling and… Y/N?” he suddenly interrupts his rambling, “Are you… are you crying?”

You turn to him again and see the widening of his eyes when he catches the evidence for his suspicion, “Yes,” you cry out, as tears run down unbidden your cheeks, “Yes, I’m crying, I’m sorry,” you hide your face in your hands.

“No, no, no, no, sweetheart,” he reaches over you, desperation etched on his voice as he wraps your shaking shoulder in a tight hug, “Please don’t cry… I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything…I don’t wanna see you like that. Please don’t cry.” His voice shakes, “Or I’m gonna cry, too.” And as if on cue, you hear the sniffles.

Burying your cheeks on his shirt, dampening the fabric with tears, you let yourself be hugged by him. And, just like that, you live the most pathetic scene of your life, two grown ass adults holding each other and sobbing like babies, without saying anything for God knows how many minutes.

You have no idea what has come over you, but hearing him saying that, right after being proposed by Eddie, after finding yourself with such conflicting thoughts and feelings, must have triggered something inside you.

When your shoulders stop shaking so much and the tears seem to give you two a truce, you lean away from him, “I’m sorry, Bucky,” you say, wiping the wetness from the corner of your eyes with your fingers, “This was ridiculous, God… I guess it’s been an intense day…” you take in a shuddering breath.

“No, no,” He swipes the back of his hand on his cheeks, brushing out the wetness from there, “I shouldn’t have said anything, I’m the one who’s sorry. Let’s forget all about it-”

“No,” you cut him off, “No, Bucky, it’s ok, I’m glad you told me,” you put some softness in your voice for the huge man who has just cried his eyeballs out with you, “But… Are you sure? I mean… it’s you.” Shrugging your shoulder, you gesture towards him with both your hands, “That’s not what you want, it’s against all of your life philosophy, your lifestyle.”

He chuckles and his gaze drops, before they’re on you again, “You know, I’ve never taken anyone else to that burger joint, I’ve never shown that picture to anyone and even less talked about my sisters… my mom… Then our night together, right here in your bedroom?” He points towards the room, “I’ve had tons, I mean, tons of sex my whole life, I don’t need to lie about that. But I never had a night like that with anyone else. That wasn’t just sex and I’m sure you know what I’m talking about.”

You’re entranced by his words and you feel yourself shrinking under the intensity of his gaze on you, of the sentiment that sweeps into his voice. There’s not a bone in you that makes you contradict what he’s saying. It was a special night. Moments ago, you were still daydreaming about it.

“I know it sounds weird coming from me,” he breathes, “I know everything I said and even bragged about before is coming to bite me in the ass right now,” his jaw tightens, ”But I’m certain of what I’m feeling… I think about you all the damn time, sweetheart… I look at you and I wanna laugh and cry all at once,” he scoffs, gesturing towards his reddened eyes, and you can’t help but to let out a breathy smile. “I’m in love with you,” he bores his gaze on you. “Fuck whatever I ever wanted before. I want you now.”

You take in a deep breath, trying to breathe in the air his words knocked out of your lungs. You’re in a loss for words. In all the scenarios you pictured for this deal of Bucky and yours - which weren’t that many, since you jumped in with the mindset of seizing the moment with him – you’ve never seen that one happening: him coming over to tell you he’s fallen for you. As much as his confession sparks something inside you, that’s so unlike him, that you need to be the voice of reason there.

“Bucky…” you call softly, putting your other hand over the one that you’re already holding. You look down at it, before turning to him again, watching anxious blue eyes on yours, “You said Eddie only decided to come here and propose after seeing me with you and after trying to hook up with someone else. As you said, it shows that he’s just being impulsive and might not know what he genuinely wants, right?”

“Yeah…” He nods after clearing his throat. Apparently, that’s not what he expected you to say after he poured his heart out for you, “Because that’s the truth, the guy doesn’t know what he really wants.” He shrugs.

You offer him a tight but kind smile, “Don’t you see the similarity here?”

His forehead creases at your question.

You keep a gentle gaze on him as you speak, “This morning you went out of here after Eddie called. You knew he was coming. Then, you tried hooking up with Amanda… That didn’t work out…” You shake your head, “Now you’re here, telling me you’re in love with me, after practically seeing me with someone else and trying to have sex with another woman and not being able to go through with it.”

You see realization dawning on his face, as he understands what you’re trying to say, “No… no, that’s different.” He swiftly shakes his head.

“How so?” You insist.

“I know what I’m feeling, Y/n.” He says with firmness in his voice, “I’ve been trying to understand these feelings for a while now. The situation may have pushed me further, but it’s not the cause of anything. I’m not acting by impulse, please believe me,” he begs. 

“I’m not saying you’re not feeling anything, Bucky,” you counter, “Our time together was so special,” you smile, “I’m not blind to that… and I think… I think I-I-“

Your mouth shuts and you bite your lower lip. You almost say that there’s a chance you’ve developed feelings for him, too. But you don’t really know what those feelings mean and what you really want. You don’t really know much about them, but it’s been just one day and one night that have made you notice those sentiments… you don’t wanna lead him or even yourself on, based on feelings that have just shown up and you still have no idea where this is going.

Plus… there’s Eddie. The mere thought of him drops a weight over your shoulders.

“I-I’m confused, Bucky,” you say, instead of saying all of that, but that’s not a lie. Not at all. “I don’t really know what to feel or think… There’s a great chance you’re confused by your own feelings, too. And maybe after Eddie appeared on the scene those feelings might be doing a number on your mind and making you take them as something deeper than they really are.”

“That’s… you’re wrong, I know what I’m feeling,” he says softly, his head dropping to your joined hands, where he caresses your skin with his thumb.

“Bucky…” you sigh, “Even if you’re really in love with me like you say you are… You never wanted that,” you try to reason, as he looks up at you, “With that kind of sentiment comes commitment, and commitment is not a piece of cake. Most of the time it leads to a broken heart, most likely two. Believe me, I know.”

He doesn’t say anything, just stares at you. Your heart is tight by the traces of sorrow you catch behind the look on his face and you hate to be the one to put it there. But at that moment, that’s all you can give him, 

“As for me,” you nod, as if to engrave the thought into your mind, “I think what I need now is to be alone for a while… My entire adult life I was never single. I need to figure out who I am without having someone to lean on emotionally, physically and… I don’t know…You-you know what I’m saying? But, please, I don’t wanna hurt you, I-” You stammer, annoyed that the air you’re breathing suddenly seems to not be enough to fill your lungs. 

“Hey, hey,” he soothes, dragging himself through the cushions to come even closer to you as he notices your increasing distress, “It’s ok,” he says, taking your hand to his lips and placing a kiss on it, coaxing a short gasp out of you, “I get what you’re saying, and I respect that. I do.” He offers you a comforting smile.

The sorrow you’ve seen moments ago is not on his gaze anymore, and it helps to ease down your breathing and mind, driving you to focus solely on him, his voice and what he’s saying. 

“I don’t want to force myself or my feelings on you, and you don’t need to worry about hurting me, sweetheart. It’s ok. I promise. I’m a grown ass man, I might’ve been confused, but I can handle my own feelings.” A kind of sweetness you’ve never heard from him laces his voice, “I just need you to understand one thing, though.” His features turn a bit more serious, “I know what I’m feeling, no matter how much time passes and no matter if it’s the same for you or not. It doesn’t change anything for me. I was confused before, I was. But I’m not anymore.”

“Ok,” a low mumble is all you manage to provide as an answer, stunned by both the words and the certainty he reveals through them.

“Are we good?” He checks.

“We’re good.”

He smiles, a bright and gentle grin, and it’s the Bucky you’ve spent almost every day of the last month on his demeanor again. You smile back, feeling your shoulders a bit lighter. 

“I have one more question, though. I’m new to this whole express feelings stuff,” he grimaces playfully, “Did I screw everything up?” He asks, but there’s no weight on his words while his forehead scrunches up a bit, but the smile lingers on his lips.

You laugh a little, before bringing a hand to cup his cheek, “You didn’t screw anything up and I’m not dismissing what you’re telling me you’re feeling, Bucky, it’s not that at all.” You shake your head and it feels cozy inside your chest as he leans his cheek against the touch of your hand, “I just think we both need to take our time and understand our feelings straight. You and me.” You lightly stroke his cheek with your thumb.

“Does that mean our deal is off?” He asks with a cringing curve on his lips.

You let out a chuckle, bringing your hand to your lap, “Let’s call it suspended for now, how about that?”

He shrugs, “Ok, but Little Bucky down there is going to be very upset, he turned out to have a strict preference.”

“Oh my God.” You let out a loud laugh, “Little Bucky? Seriously?”

“Don’t make fun of him, he’s very sensitive today.” He puts on an exaggerated pout. 

Your head falls back from how much you laugh, being followed shortly by him. You don’t know if it’s a habit developed in the last month or something bigger than that, but you can’t help when your lips and his meet. He sighs through the kiss, which starts slow and gentle, but next thing you know, you’re both breathing hard and you have your fingers buried through his locks as he pulls you by the waist, his broad body on yours, his arms around you, his heat burning you up while your heart beats fast against his chest…

You have to put together every little ounce of strength inside you to part your lips from him, letting your forehead rest against his.

“Bucky…” you whisper, trying to catch some hair, “We shouldn’t-“.

“See you around, sweetheart,” he says back and, after placing a long kiss on your forehead, he gets up and walks towards the door, sporting a cheeky little smirk on his lips that makes your heart race even more. 

~~~

To be continued…


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky is ready for commitment!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s been 84 years, but I hope you have fun!

Placing your hands on each side of your hips, you smirk at the popped-up screen in your office. Another project you just nailed. Ever since the promotion, your productivity has increased tenfold and you feel as motivated as ever, your creativity on a top level. Also, the last few weeks, after you decided you needed some time alone, you did set more focus on yourself and your own projects. Work being one of them.

It’s weird to say the least… you’ve been busier than ever and yet, it seems like you actually have much more time to yourself now. You’ve been reading books you’ve bought but never really got to read them, eating ice-cream at 3am as you watch The Return of the King for the millionth time, your drawers are finally organized and so is your precious DVD collection. You got to explore a great number of parks and spots you’ve never been before, even living in New York for so long. You’ve been going out a lot and catching up with friends and family. 

It was a good decision. You remember in your relationship with Eddie there were always obstacles for you to hang out with people outside the small inner circle of you as a couple. Sometimes the obstacles were subtle, and not always brought solely by Eddie, but also by you who let yourself get involved in that dynamic. You had no idea how much you missed people that were yours only, and not yours and Eddie’s.

It’s been great to be single. Really, really single for the first time in your adult life. No boyfriends or fiancées, no booty-calls or deals. Completely single… A title and state of mind you didn’t really get to enjoy in the first months of being broken up, being too heartbroken to even think of everything you could do with your life then.

Deciding to be alone for a while…It was a great and reasonable decision.

You have to admit something to yourself, though.

Sometimes you just wanna throw “great” and “reasonable” out of the window. Because you do miss him… A lot.

Finding out how he’s changed his mind and predisposition towards your relationship has messed quite a bit with your mind… and heart. You weren’t expecting that at all and now you don’t really know what to do with the chaos that’s bringing upon your feelings. And what’s making it even messier is the other guy who also changed his mind and predisposition towards your relationship… you weren’t expecting that either… however, that particular change of heart hasn’t been making your own heart jump each time you think of it…

Squeaky little yells and an animated chattering sound of female voices catch your attention to outside your office. Your previous smirk turns into a smile while you shake your head to yourself. That type of commotion only ensues when a certain someone drops by the Tech Department. 

With a wave of your hand, you shut down the screen you’ve been working on, before moving towards the sound. What you come to find a few stops outside your office, at the Department’s common area, is a little circle of your female coworkers around a Super Soldier. He’s always a hit among your coworkers, but today it seems like they’re even in a bigger frenzy, fussing around something that he seems to be holding in his arms. You attempt to catch an eye of it, but the bodies in front of you make it quite hard.

He spots you as you approach them and opens a huge grin at your sight.

You smile back at him just as widely and after you come closer and some of the girls make room, your eyes widen and a small little gasp slips out of you when you finally find out what the fuss is all about. They are all cooing and marveling at a beautiful cat on Bucky’s arms, white as snow on a mountain peak, standing there like royalty, staring back like they’re nothing but proud of being where they are.

“Hey,” Bucky greets, prompting your eyes to focus back on him.

“Hi, there,” you answer back while your gaze carries an amused question mark at him.

He lifts a hard drive with his free hand to your vision field, “We collected this last mission, it’s some alien stuff,” he offers you the drive, keeping his eyes on yours.

As you gaze at each other, you reach for the little device. His fingers brush against yours and that’s precisely when the chattering around both of you becomes nothing but a distant and vague noise that barely reaches your senses… until a loud clear of throat sound stands out.

“Alright, girls, let’s get back to our desks and let these two, ahm… work,” Camilla, your closest friend there, gives you a pointed look and a discrete curve curls the corner of her lips as she leads the group - which looks far from happy about it - away. 

When your gaze meets Bucky again, he’s got that shit-eating grin of his that tells you the little interaction between you and your friend didn’t quite skip from his attention.

You bite your lip and are about to say something when he beats you to it, “Sorry, I had to bring her with me.” He looks down at the cat on his arm and gives it a gentle shake, grinning down at her while she looks up at him before her incredibly blue eyes shut in what looks like sheer contentment, “This little girl right here started whining at the door when I was leaving… she just can’t leave my side anymore.” Bucky shrugs and ticks his tongue, before winking at you.

You chuckle, finding the surprising scene before you nothing less than adorable. The fact that you enjoy being in the presence of his charm again doesn’t go unnoticed by you, but you say nothing about it, “It’s ok, of course. I love cats. What’s her name?”

“Y/N, this is Alpine. Alpine this is Y/N,” he introduces you two with pride lacing his voice.

“Oh, hello, Alp-” your attempt of petting the cat comes to an abrupt halt with you withdrawing your hand at the loud hiss the animal aims at you.

Your eyes snap at Bucky to see his jaw dropping and his eyes widening with a mix of shock and fluster, “Fucking Christ,” he gasps, before looking down at the cat who now licks its paws absentmindedly, “What the hell, missy? Apologize. Apologize now,” he scolds, gaining absolutely no reaction in response.

He scoffs, looking back at you with incredulous lifted eyebrows.

You laugh, mainly at his attempt of making Alpine apologize, “Don’t worry…” You wave him off, “How did that happen, though? I don’t remember you having a cat.” You narrow your eyes just when your head tilts.

He bites his lower lip before an almost cringing smile forms on his lips, “Oh well…”

A FEW WEEKS BEFORE…

“Weren’t the Skrulls, like, actually good guys?” Bucky frowns, shoving one of his post-missions Oreos in his mouth and crossing his ankles over the spaceship’s dash.

“Every bunch has its bad apple, I guess,” from the pilot’s seat Natasha shrugs, eyeing the apple in question from over her shoulder.

“You’ll regret this,” threatens the prisoner, who’s actually a Skrull slaver named Gragnon and has his hands and feet securely tied up, stuck on a sit at the back of the ship. Still, he tries to get up and advance towards the front, but a shield of red mist surges in front of him, making him fall back on the chair again with a growl.

Wanda, the third member of the party on that mission, smirks from her seat right behind Nat’s.

Nat rolls her eyes, “What a douche… Talos has been leading a search for him for years now, he’d be thankful we’re taking him to them. Feet off the dash, please.” 

Bucky quickly obeys, pulling down his legs to the floor as Wanda snickers. 

“In fact… we should thank the success of this mission to a certain someone, who came up with a device to break alien codes.” The cheeky smile on Wanda’s face as she started speaking only fades so she can shoot a glare back at the prisoner, who’s now revolved by a red mist dome.

“Damn right.” A dreamy little curl pulls Bucky’s lips as he swings on his seat and passes the bag of Oreos to Wanda.

“Jesus,” Nat scoffs, setting the ship on autopilot, before swirling her chair to see both Bucky and Wanda, “Could you ever imagine this could be possible? That this guy would someday be that smitten over someone?” she questions Wanda.

“Not in a million years. I don’t know Y/N that well, but I bow to her.” Wanda mimics the gesture before shoving a cookie in her mouth.

Bucky doesn’t even drop the dreaminess of his smile. He is smitten… completely… utterly… and fuck if that doesn’t feel damn good. He always thought that kind of feeling would be a pain in the ass, boring and painful. It is not. He feels like singing, dancing, hugging every human being and alien he comes across. Fuck, he would hug the Gragnon dude if it didn’t mean to get a kick in the ass from Natasha. It’s been ages that he doesn’t really get high on anything, but that feeling… he’s definitely hooked on it. There’s not a doubt inside him anymore and he’s in love with being in love with you.

“So, spill it,” Nat crosses her legs, swinging on her chair “You really went to her place and poured your heart out to her? Right after her ex proposed to her?” She questions, “What did she say?”

“Well, first she thought I was kidding and laughed her ass off…” He shakes his head with the same dreamy little smile on his lips, “Then, when she realized I was not, she started crying and, of course, so did I.” He shrugs, ignoring when Nat and Wanda exchange looks, “She wasn’t expecting that from me at all, and, we can’t really blame her can we?” 

“Definitely not.”

“Nope.”

Bucky chuckles at the unison response from her friends before leaning over and snatching the bag of cookies from Wanda, before giving them the details of his talk with you, having their undivided attention. “And she said she needs some time alone, being single, I mean, to sort her feelings out… Also, it seems like she doesn’t think I can’t deal with the kind of commitment that being in love requires,” he says with a mouthful.

“Oh, honey…” Nat tilts her head.

He notices the sympathy on hers and Wanda’s expressions and waves his hand to brush her worries off, “No, no. None of that. All in all, it went pretty well. As much as I wished it would be different, I think her decision is fair. At least she didn’t say yes to the jackass with the ring,” he huffs, “I wasn’t really expecting her to throw herself in my arms. At least, not just yet.” He smirks.

“What?” Natasha shoots a look at Wanda before turning to him, “You’re not stepping aside?”

Bucky snorts at the question, “Are you kidding me? The first broad I ever fall in love with and you think I’ll leave the path free for that short little clown who thinks ten years matter?” He lets out an exaggeratedly loud laugh, “I’ve lived more than one hundred of them. Ten years mean nothing to me, and soon enough she’ll realize it doesn’t have to mean much to her, either.” A small smile rises on his face, “Of course she can have the time for herself she wants, find out what’s like being single. She deserves that. And she can think and figure out all she needs… have her fun… It’s all good…” He nods, “But in the meanwhile? I’ll be around romancing the shit out of that woman,” he states, right before tossing another cookie in his mouth.

“Holy shit,” Wanda addresses Natasha, with both eyebrows high on her forehead.

“I know…” Nat answers with an equally dumbfounded look on her face, before turning to Bucky, “Listen,” she sighs and tilts her head, “I hate to be such a killjoy here, but… I get you’re in love, and I know this is new and exciting for you.” She’s smiling before her lips tighten, “Having said that… I think she might have a point about you not being ready for commitment Bucky, you never wanted that. I’m gonna be honest here, I’m the one who set what you two had up because I thought it wouldn’t lead to this…” She waves all around him, “Feelings, I mean… and I would hate myself if you two ended up hurt because of it.” She focuses an apprehensive gaze on him while Wanda also rests her attention on him, looking like she agrees with her friend.

Bucky takes a good look between the two of them before putting into words the answer that’s so clear on his head now, “I know it may sound weird and uncharacteristic of me. Trust me, I know that.” He nods at Natasha, taking a moment to silently communicate with her in the way that has been always so easy for the two of them, “You’re right, I’ve never wanted that. Settling down to just one person, commit to a long term relationship…But with her,” he sighs and the corner of his lips curl up without further notice, “I want her and I want all of that with her, the whole package. I’m ready. I’m not afraid. I think the reason I didn’t want all of that before is because I hadn’t met her yet. That’s it. Simple as that. I know it’s not going to be easy, but to hell with easy. I want her. And I want her hard.”

Wanda already has a huge grin on her face when a satisfied little smirk twists Nat’s lips, “That’s what Amanda said.”

Bucky’s eyes widen before he squints at her, “What’ve you been up to?”

Nat puts on a nonchalant face and reaches forward to grab a cookie from the package. She takes a bite and shrugs, “Poor girl… needed some comfort after being let down by your buddy down there.”

Bucky lets out an outraged scoff and throws a cookie on her way, from which she dodges easily as she laughs, “I bet you were of great help in consoling her… Jesus… Amanda and you? The world isn’t ready.” He shakes his head.

Natasha sports a smug smile on her face when she nods her agreement, “You’re not wrong.”

“Alright, as much as I want to hear all about this Amanda girl, we’re getting close to the Skrull base now and we need you to land us, Nat,” Wanda nods towards the dash.

“Copy that,” Natasha makes a military salute at her, before shifting her seat and taking control of the ship again.

“And as for you,” Wanda turns to Bucky, “I don’t need to read what’s on your mind to know you’re telling us the truth. You’re ready for commitment,” she offers him a soft smile, which he reciprocates, “And if you really wanna show her that, I may have an idea.” Her smile turns into a devious little smirk and that’s enough to pique Bucky’s interest.

~~~

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Bucky asks, shoving his hands in his pockets as he walks alongside Wanda through the busy sidewalks of Manhattan, “I mean… I know I said yes, but it is one hell of a commitment, what if it’s not for me?”

“Don’t worry, Bucky,” she smiles, “We’re just gonna take a look around, feel the vibe, and then see what happens. You don’t have to decide anything just yet,” she assures, wrapping an arm around his elbow as he looks down at her, “I just think it’s a good idea for you to get to know a bit more of this sudden inclination to commit…to experiment, I guess,” Wanda shrugs, “Besides, a dear friend of mine runs the shelter and the girl knows her stuff. If she feels like you’re not ready, she won’t allow you to get out of there with one of her babies.”

Bucky lets out a laugh. Feeling a little lighter about the subject, he places his hand over the one Wanda has wrapped around his arm, “Alright… I’m not opposed to the idea of having a dog, I guess. I always loved Labradors…” he frowns, “I would have to switch apartments, though…”

“Look at you.” Wanda nudges her shoulder on him, “Already making plans for your child…”

“Child…” Bucky can’t help but snort. He had agreed to Wanda’s idea of going to an animal shelter because he thought it would be a good way to show you he’s ready for commitment and, like he said, he’s always been fond of dogs and he’s sure if he ends up taking one home he’ll treat them well. But he also never understood how some people could be so attached to an animal to the point of considering them a child, or family…“I don’t know… I’m definitely not taking a pet home today. I agree with you, I shouldn’t decide anything just yet.”

As they walk past a small alleyway, Wanda halts, forcing him to stop with her.

“What?” Bucky frowns down at her.

“Shhh,” she brings a finger to her lips, staring towards the alleyway, “Listen.”

That’s when Bucky’s enhanced hearing catches the thin and shaky little sound coming through the trash cans.

“Come on,” Wanda pulls him to the alley and towards the cans.

What they find behind one of the containers, among all the filth around is a ball of white fur. Curled up and shaking just like the meows they heard seconds ago. A cat, a young adult white cat looks up and a pair of baby blue eyes meets Bucky’s and he just can’t look away from the plea on them and it’s just when something clicks inside his chest.

“Oh, no, look,” Wanda points at the tail, that has an evident injury on it, but when she leans down to examine it further, the animal flinches and rushes towards Bucky’s legs, letting out another trembling and weak meow. Bucky freezes as it starts climbing up his calves. 

Given the poor coordination on their back little legs – probably from the damage on the tail- it can go much higher, but keeps trying. After the initial surprise, Bucky can’t help but to smile at the little fighter, who seems to reach out at him for protection. Next thing he knows, he’s leaning down and picks it up with all the caution he can muster.

“Hello, little lady… what happened there, huh?” He coos, nodding towards the small injury, which looks like a bite, having the cat meowing while bumping and rubbing the head against his chest.

“Is it a female?” Wanda tilts her head, an amused and questioning expression on her face.

Bucky smirks, not taking his eyes away from the animal, who is now quiet and seems much calmer, but digging her little claws on Bucky’s shirt, “I know a beautiful lady when I see one. Don’t I, gorgeous?”

A purring sound comes out of the now contented animal, the small injury on her tail apparently not being a problem anymore while she climbs higher and practically hugs Bucky with her little paws, whose fur is smudged by dirt, making his heart take a flip in his chest. Damn his heart nowadays…

“Aww, Bucky…” Wanda smiles, placing her hand over her heart, “What are we going to do? Should we take her to the shelter?” Wanda offers, with a bit of tentativeness on her voice.

Bucky’s eyes widen largely, before they snap to her friend. A protective tightness laces his hold on Alpine, who lets out another weak meow. Shit… Alpine? When the hell did he even come up with a name? Fuck if he knows, all he knows he’s done for and can’t possibly think of parting from that white furry little thing, who seems to have gone through a lot in her life already and probably has never met with human kindness before.

He doesn’t need to say anything as understanding falls upon Wanda’s face. He would even guess there’s a bit of pride adorning the smile on her lips now, “Alright, alright… we do need to take Alpine to the vet, though, Mr. I’m not gonna take a pet home today.” She winks.

~~~

PRESENT DAY…

“Oh well…” Bucky scratches the back of his neck while you keep your beautiful interested eyes on him, “I found this beauty on the street… she had an injured tail, poor thing… probably bitten by a dog. But she’s fine now, aren’t you, sweetie?” He coos, putting on the new tone of voice that belongs to Alpine now and loving the sound of your chuckle, “You know… I’m fully committed to taking care of her. I’m a cat dad now.” He says, putting some effort to highlight the word “committed”.

“I can see that…” you comment, nodding with a glimmer of fondness in your gaze at where Alpine is cuddled against him with eyes closed, completely relaxed.

Bucky looks down and smiles. That one is too cute for her own good, but he’s definitely having a talk with her later, for hissing at you like that, like he hadn’t given her a lecture about good behavior and how incredible you were before they left home. 

“So, it’s been a while, huh? How’re you doing?” He asks softly, boring his eyes on you and holding back every ounce of him to not pull you to his arms and shower you with all the intense love he’s gathering in his chest at your sight in front of him. If it was up to him, he wouldn’t have spent those long weeks apart from you, but he met with missions and an Alpine in the way. Also, as much as he’s resolved to show you he’s the one for you, he understands you needed time for yourself. But, hell, he missed you so much.

“Oh, I’m good, I’m good… pretty good,” you ramble, brushing a finger behind your ear, that thing you do when you become a bit self-conscious, which happens often when he places his gaze so intently on you.

He can’t help but smile, his chest impossibly swelled with his feelings for you, because that woman who becomes all flustered with his attention is the same woman who whined to suck his dick while shitfaced after a party. Damn, he’s so in love with you.

“That’s great…Are you free tonight?” He asks, smoothly, “Wanda and Sam will make hamburgers, they’re one hell of a team in the kitchen, you’ll be welcome to come if you want to.”

“Oh… I…” You falter.

“I’m not trying anything, I promise,” He’s quick to add with a chuckle and raises his free hand up, noticing the trepidation in your voice. “Everyone’s gonna be there. We’re just gonna eat and hangout.” He shrugs.

“Oh… no, it’s not that, it’s just…” You tighten your lips “I’ve got plans.” Something Bucky guesses to be disappointment or something like that sweeps into your voice. As for him, he holds his breath, bracing himself for the news that you’re going out with that douche of an ex, “I’m gonna meet some friends from college tonight. I got a reservation for us for dinner and then we’re gonna go dance…”

Bucky lets out a breath and the smile that grows in his face is wide when he says, “Oh, alright. That sounds like fun.” Really, really fun, especially if that jackass isn’t involved. He’s not disappointed. Far from it. 

You smile back at him, matching his mood. It doesn’t slip from his attention that you seem a bit surprised by his reaction at you declining an invitation from him in favor to hang out with your friends, but he says nothing of it.

“Yeah… I’ve been getting reacquainted with them lately,” you say, excitement plastered on the little curve of your lips and the glint in your eyes, “It’s been fun. I’d love to get to know Wanda and Sam’s talent in the kitchen, though….Maybe some other time?” You offer.

“Sounds perfect, sweetheart.”

The term of endearment brings the effect he was aiming for when you promptly does that thing with your finger on your ear again, but it was also noticed by the other girl in the room and currently in his arm, who seems to wake up from her comfort slumber against his chest to hiss at you again.

You look at each other in widened eyes.

“What the hell,” Bucky scolds down at the cat, glancing at you briefly, catching your now amused expression, before addressing Alpine again in a whispery voice, “We’re gonna have a talk back home, young lady.”

~~~

“What a number you put out there, huh?” His voice is gentle despite the reprimanding intention in his words while Bucky crouches and fills her little plate with the special food the vet recommended.

With her crystal-clear eyes glued on the plate, Alpine doesn’t really acknowledge his half attempt of admonishing her before digging in.

Bucky chuckles, “She’s cute, isn’t she? But so are you,” He scratches the back of her ear and she stops eating for a moment to brush her head against his hand, “You don’t have to be jealous, doll. You’re so cute, you’re my girl, too, you know?” he coos, still petting her, “But you gotta help me out there buddy. Ok? She’s really special and I know you’ll love her, too.”

Alpine lets out a weak meow before getting back to her plate and Bucky swears to God he sometimes wonders if the cat is some sort of shapeshifter in disguise, understanding every little thing he says. 

Letting her out to eat, he stands up, “Hey, Friday,” he calls.

“Yes, Bucky?”

“Could you search for a table reservation in the name of Y/N Y/L/N tonight? I need the address of the place.”

A small silence ensues before the A.I speaks again, “Isn’t it a bit creepy?”

He sighs, placing his hands on his hips, “Friday… babe…” He smiles at the giggles that resound in his kitchen, before bringing a hand to his heart, “I’m in love, ok? I’m not gonna ruin her night…If anything, I’m just going to make her night out with her friends more… interesting.”

“Alright, you know I can’t say no to you,” the A.I concedes, “You can find the address in your phone’s map. Good luck, handsome.”

“Thanks, babe,” Bucky grins, before turning to Alpine, who’s now about done with her food, sprawled on the floor busy with cleaning out her paws, “And you?” He calls, catching her attention before he points at her, “You’ll have burgers with your aunt Wanda. I have plans for tonight.” 

~~~

To be continued…


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky romances the shit out of you. In his own way.

The sour taste of lemon eases down the burn in your throat after the second shot of tequila of the night. Laughs and chattering sounds mingle with the beats around you in the dark place.

“So, how’s single life treating you, Y/n?” Brianna asks raising her voice to be heard, making the attention of your other friends, Maddie and Taylor, turn to you as well with expectant looks on their faces while the four of you stands around a tall and stylish table.

Since they all wanted to dance, you ended up choosing a restaurant that turned into a club later in the night. The place is a bit too fancy for your taste, but the music is good, as well as the drinks and the company. 

At college, they were your little gang, but with time, as your relationship with Eddie became more and more serious, the group ended up drifting apart, shrinking the relationship into occasional text messages and even more rare encounters. Maddie is the exception, since her fiancée, David, is friends with Eddie, which led to the four of you keep hanging out as couples. 

You feel guilty and stupid for letting them aside, because you missed this, so much. And so did they, for when you called them, they were all on board to start seeing each other more.

“Pretty good, actually,” you answer, taking a sip of your bottle of water. You don’t mind getting a bit tipsy that night, but you need to get an uber by yourself back home and you definitely don’t want it to escalate to you ending up drunk on a stranger’s car, “I mean, I’ve been seeing you guys more often, I’ve been reading a lot, watching all my favorite films-”

“Don’t you miss banging?” Brianna asks, frowning at you.

“Bri,” Taylor scolds, but turns her focus on you, anyway, waiting for an answer, as does Maddie. 

You clear your throat, making some time before answering. You haven’t told them about Bucky… you’re not even sure why, but you suspect that it’s just because you don’t know exactly how to define him in your life. For a reason you still don’t have clear in your mind, you can’t just refer to him as a guy you had a deal with to bang, “Ahm… I’m not focusing on that right now.” You shrug, not telling a complete lie. 

“Ugh, girl, you should,” Brianna grimaces, “I mean… we all know Eddie was your first and only,” She huffs, “Now that you’re out there in the world, there’s so much you could explore. I mean… so much.” She smirks.

“You better hurry up, though,” Maddie says, gulping down some water, “Eddie is determined to get back with you, he’s been talking to David a lot about it and, I mean, he proposed and all.”

The grimace on Brianna’s face twists hard, while Taylor smiles sympathetically at you. 

“I know…” You sigh, looking down for a second, “I just don’t know how I feel about it.”

“You know what? It was about time that relationship of yours with Eddie to be over-“

“Alright, alright,” Taylor, ever the peacemaker intervenes, shooting a warning look at Brianna, who stays quiet but doesn’t seem too happy about it, “Enough about exes and fiancées.” Taylor looks past your shoulders and nods, just when a small smirk curls up her lips, “Look at that guy right there… a damn greek God, he would be perfect for you to explore, like Bri said.”

You chuckle lightly, not really getting as excited as you are expected to be.

While Maddie stands on her toes to look for the guy, you spot when Brianna’s face light up right before she shrieks, “Holy shit, that’s not just some hot guy, that’s The Winter Fucking Soldier.”

The air catches in your throat as your eyes widen, “Bucky?” You swiftly turn towards the direction they’re looking at. And there’s the man himself. Sipping from a glass of whiskey while listening to what one of the two girls he’s talking to is saying. Before there’s a chance of his gaze lock with yours, your face snaps forward again.

You ignore Brianna squinting at you, and bring your bottle of water to your suddenly dry lips. Seeing him there made you, all of a sudden, a nervous teenager who spots a crush at a party. You do need to figure out your damn feelings soon…

“Oh, yeah…” Maddie says, realization running over her face, “That’s him. Damn he looks good… Y/N, oh my God, do you often come across him at work?” She asks, excited curiosity on her voice.

“Sometimes, yeah…” you mumble, biting your lip, still a bit shook by his presence. Could it be just a coincidence? You remember telling him you were going out, but you don’t remember telling him where you would be…

“You’re so lucky to work there,” Taylor sighs while your mind runs at full speed, “The Avengers… holy shit, why are they all so hot? That Falcon dude…”

“What about Captain America? That ass…” Maddie says, with a dreamy tone, “And Thor… Tony Stark…the damn Hulk...”

“Bucky?” Brianna finally speaks, squinting harder at you and interrupting Maddie while she went over all the Avengers names and hotness, “Bucky? When did you two get so intimate… and why are you so flustered to see him here?” She tips her chin and waves all over you. Her eyes go bigger before she smirks, “You sneaky little I’m not focusing on sex right now bitch, you’ve been fucking him, haven’t you? You’ve been boning the Winter Soldier.”

You’re sure you look like a deer caught in headlights, because Maddie and Taylor gaping expressions now match Brianna’s. Seeing no point or really no good reason to hide the blatant truth from your friends, you allow you initial fluster to mold into a smirks, “A lot of fucking, actually,” you admit. 

After the squeaky reaction, you tell them all about the deal you had with Bucky, just leaving out the part when he confessed his feelings. That’s still a sensitive topic to you and you’re not sure how much Bucky would be ok with having such an intimate situation exposed. The sex bits, though? You’re pretty sure he wouldn’t mind whatsoever. 

“Oh my god,” Taylor gasps when you’re done, “I’m gonna need another shot after that.” She fans herself before calling for a waiter.

“Make it four, we’re all pretty thirsty now,” Brianna wiggles her eyebrows at you, “Holy shit, and here I was thinking our girl was moping around and drying out from the inside of that vagina out.” She scoffs to herself, ”You go, you glorious bitch.” She reaches out for a discreet high five under the table, to which you quickly respond with a laugh.

“Ahm, guys…” Maddie calls, frowning at the screen of her phone after looking up with an apologetic expression, “David just texted me. He and Eddie are at the door to come in.” She cringes.

“Oh…” You frown at the news.

“Shit…” Brianna laughs, while the waiter arrives with the trail of shots Taylor had ordered, “This sure is going to be an interesting night.” She catches two glasses from the trail, handing one directly to you.

“Maddie, did you tell David to come? Of course he would bring Eddie…” Taylor tilts her head in a chastising way while the waiter places the other two shots on the table. 

“I didn’t know,” Maddie looks helpless, before turning to you, “Y/N, I swear… I can call David and tell them to go somewhere else, he will understand-“

“Shh,” you wave and shake your head at her dismissively, “Don’t worry, Mads, it’s fine.” You soothe her, “But my plans of going home sober have just gone down the drain.” You shrug, right before turning down your shot.

Grimacing at the sower taste, you glance behind your shoulder. You don’t spot Bucky there, anymore. You doubt he has left the place, but you catch yourself wishing that was the case. Eddie being there doesn’t bother you as much as the possibility of Bucky thinking you had made plans with your ex. 

Damn… you really need to put your feelings in check.

“Alright,” Brianna turns down her shot and claps her hands, “Come on, let’s dance, we can fix ourselves another shot in our way,” she decides, pulling you by the hand, to which you offer no resistance. 

You have no idea what Eddie or Bucky are doing there and of course it puts you off a bit, since you weren’t expecting an encounter with the two of them that night… but you know one thing, you came here to have fun and you might as well do exactly that.

While Taylor and Maddie choose to stay by the table, you and Brianna go to the dance floor. There’s a lot of dancing, drinking and laughs… so much laughing. The DJ puts on a playlist from your college decade and you two go wild with that.

“I need some water, be right back,” Brianna pants in your ear at some point, and you just nod, too involved in the music to stop dancing. This is one of the perks of staying single. You discovered a lot about you and just how much you enjoy dancing was something you’ve never been aware of yourself before.

A few minutes pass after Brianna left and you keep swaying to the music until you feel a pair of arms around your waist. A smile pops in your lips as an instant flashback surges in your mind: the first time you went out with Bucky… met his friends… danced with them until he came to get you… circling his arms around you just like that.

Chuckling, you turn around but the smiling face your gaze meets is not the one you saw back then. 

It’s Eddie.

“Hi,” he greets, keeping his hands on your waist.

You sure hope the disappointment isn’t etched on your face when you greet him back with a weak but friendly enough hello. You take a step back, unraveling yourself from his hands.

“Ahm…” He clears his throat, letting his arms fall to each side of him, “I saw you dancing when I came in.” He smiles, tilting his face closer to you and speaking loudly so you can hear him, “You looked beautiful…”

At the compliment your eyes shift to the floor and, not really sure how to respond, you just let out a small and breathy laugh. 

“I hope you don’t mind me being here, David called me and I… I’m not gonna lie, I really wanted to see you.” He leans even closer.

“Eddie…” you sigh, taking another step back as your eyes, almost involuntarily, roams around, trying to spot if anyone is watching you. And by anyone, your mind means Bucky. You find him. He’s up there in one of the mezzanines, engaged on a conversation with a group of people. You’re not even sure he’s seen you there. He’s not looking at you and he hasn’t come to say hello…

“Ahm,” Eddie brushes the back of his neck and your attention is on him again. He presses his lips in a tight smile before speaking again, “It’s been a while since I’ve seen the girls, I’m gonna go say hello and grab something to drink.” He nods towards the direction of the table you were with your friends before.

“Oh, ok, ahm, I’ll go with you,” you say and his whole face light up, “I need something to drink, too.”

He nods with a smile and gestures for you to lead the way.

Despite some initial wariness of Eddie’s presence among the girls, the night plays out pretty smoothly, actually. The little group you’re a part of engages in a jovial and light conversation. It seems like college all over again and it’s so much fun. You like that. Every once in a while, your gaze meets Eddie’s and, for that split of moment, it seems like nothing’s changed, but at the same time, it’s all different. Going out with your friends and having so much fun with Eddie at your side weren’t something that was a part of your relationship. But you could get used to that…

At the same time… more often than you dare to acknowledge, your gaze navigates unbidden to search for Bucky, to see what he’s doing, to check if he’s looking at you, to see if he’s still there or maybe has left… with someone else… Every single time your eyes find him, but not once he looks at you.

It makes you feel some kind of way… some longing kind of feeling.

When the shots and the water become a bit much, you excuse yourself to the ladies room, to where Taylor goes with you.

“So… it seems like you’re dealing pretty well with Eddie being here, huh?” she says, looking at you through the mirror while you both fix your lipsticks by the sink.

“Yeah…” you frown and shrug, “I’m kinda surprised to be honest. We almost never did this while we were together. I thought he didn’t like it, but maybe it was just us being too accommodated into a routine, I guess…” You look to your lips and resume to apply your lipstick.

“Yeah…” she closes her lipstick and places back in her purse, “Or he’s just making an effort to win you back…”

You sigh, watching her through the mirror, “Maybe… I don’t know…”

“What about…” she looks around the bathroom, there’s only a couple of other girls, but Taylor has always been the more discreet one, “the other guy? What’s really there? The way you talked about him, the way you looked at him… it didn’t seem like just sex to me…”

Oh… the million-dollar question. You put your lipstick away and turn to face her, “I don’t know…” You lick your lips after letting out an exhale, “He did tell me he was feeling something more,” you admit.

“Ah… I see…” She smirks. “What about you, huh?” She pulls you away from the countertop and to a small lounge area there in the restroom.

“I don’t know.” You shake your head, while a small smile curls your lip, “I mean…he’s… incredible… such a free spirit…” You grin wider as you think of him, “I had never met anyone like him before. I guess it’s impossible not to end up feeling something, but…” Your smile falters a bit, “I’m not sure how much he would be up to everything else, all the drama, I mean, that comes with a relationship… with experiencing a feeling deeper than just… sex.” You shrug and look down, crossing your arms in front of your chest.

“I see… but… Can I tell you something?” She asks, tilting her head.

You look up at her, nodding for her to continue. 

“Don’t get me wrong but, I feel like maybe you’re feeling and thinking that way because in your relationship with Eddie, you’ve learned that love, freedom, fun… all of that couldn’t work together and… I’m not sure that’s the rule of every relationship, though. It can be light, fun, meaningful and still be a committed relationship. It sure seems like you enjoy yourself with Bucky, and that’s what really matters in the end, right? They way you feel about yourself when you’re with someone?”

You just ponder her words for a second. You’ve been thinking about it a lot… the time you spent together makes you wonder how a relationship with Bucky would play out and… it makes your heart so light and hopeful… But it doesn’t mean that it wouldn’t lead to hurt or even that you have your feelings all figured out, yet.

“Anyway…” You shake your head, “He didn’t even look at me tonight, so…maybe it was really just an infatuation all along…” You run your tongue inside your lips, trying to suppress the heaviness suddenly in your chest, “Come on, let’s not spend the night in here.” You chuckle, nodding and walking towards the way out as Taylor just eyes you but follows you nevertheless.

The sight you come across as soon as you step out of the restroom makes you stop on your track.

He’s leaning by the wall of the alleyway, both hands behind his back, one leg folded up, his foot pressed against the wall. Dark grey t-shirt and blue jeans. Short fluffy hair in a combed back style. Perfect enough to grab… just how he likes it. Plump lips shadowed by a light scruff and soft blue eyes trained on you. 

Damn… He takes your breath away.

“Ahm, ok… yeah…gotta go, see you, later, Y/N.” Taylor says and swiftly leaves the scene.

All the while, you just don’t seem to be able to move your gaze away from him. When you spot the smile starting to curl his lips, you feel the tug on yours, too. And there you are, looking and smile at each other… the sounds of music and chattering muffled by the big door that separates the bathrooms area from the rest of the club.

Without uttering a word or parting his eyes from yours, Bucky extends a hand to you. An invitation…

Your gaze drops to the tempting hand, and then you glance at the door to the club. In your chest, your heart beats fast and almost louder than the music, like it’s making you notice it, telling you loudly and clearly you what it wants. When you look back at him, you have your lower lip pressed between your teeth and you step closer.

Your hands barely touch before he gently envelops yours in his. As the heat of his skin covers yours, his smile widens at you and he moves away from the wall he’s been leaning onto, moving towards the opposite direction of the music, leading you with him by his hand.

You hadn’t even seen the small black door by the end of the hallway, but he opens it and you follow him. Walking behind him, never letting go of his hand, he walks you through what seems like a storage room, until you find another door that leads you to a flight of stairs. Your breathing increases and you gulp down as you climb up the stairs with him. No questions. There’s no need.

When you get to the end of the steps, he stops in front of a two-leaf door and lets go of your hand to open it. He turns to you and, with that sweet smile of his, gestures for you step to the other side.

You breathe in the fresh outside air and step into what seems like a roof deck in construction. The sound of the door shutting behind catches your attention before you feel his heat on your back and his arms around your waist.

You lean back and your eyes flutter shut once he breathes in through your hair, making your arms go slack. Shit … you really missed him.

“It’s going to be pretty when it’s done, don’t you think?” He talks to you for the first time that night. His voice comes out in a low and raspy sound while the warmth of his breath covers your neck. Your thighs clench against one another, “I had a survey around the area once I got here and found this place. I thought it was perfect...” He whispers, tightening the hold on you.

You just let out a hum in response… The faded beats of music sound distant from where you are, but his hips start swaying, leading you with his rhythm... You sigh as a small smile pops on your lips when you cover his hands on your waist with yours. 

“How’s your night so far, huh, having fun?” His low voice vibrates through the skin of your neck.

“Lots of it,” you let out a long exhale, leaning further against him. 

“That’s good.” A faint of a kiss lays on your shoulder. “I saw you having fun down there with your friends…” He keeps the slow sway of his hips with yours, “So sexy, and beautiful,” he praises, and you lick your lips, “I hope you don’t mind me crashing in.”

A sharp gasp leaves your lips once he turns you around in his arms and you catch yourself by circling yours around his neck.

The intensity in his eyes is almost unbearable in a delicious way and his gaze roams around your face, carefully scrutinizing every single detail. With a will of its own, your lips part when your eyes drop to his, and next thing you see, you’re caged between him and the nearest wall.

He doesn’t relent to the silent plea in your parted lips and eyes focuses on his lips and, instead of locking them with yours like you can’t for a second deny that you want, he drags them over the bare skin of your neck up to your jaw.

“I thought that maybe I could add a little something to your night,” he whispers right above your pulsing point before his tongue darts to lick the skin there.

A wanton moan escapes you at the feeling… the sweet feeling of having him so close to you again. This time you spent apart from him… not for a second you forgot about the effect he has on your body… on you… and there he is again, turning you into putty under his touch.

“You look so sexy in this dress,” he continues and, without parting his lips from your neck, his hand skims up your bare thigh towards the hem of your dress, “Made me eager for a taste…” He whispers into your ears, turning your senses into a blurry fog when he drops on his knees in front of you. 

His both hands continue their ascend on your thigh and underneath your dress when a stubborn reasonable thought slips through the cloud of your senses.

“Bucky…” You pant, looking down at him, “I don’t…”

His hands stop right before they get to your underwear, “You don’t want it?” He asks, staring up at you. 

“No…I do...” you admit, completely unable to lie to him while you run a hand over your face, “Fuck, I do... I just…” You sigh, trying to organize your thoughts and words, “You said you’re…” You let out another frustrated breath by not being able to be straightforward with what you’re saying. He’s said he’s in love with you. You still don’t have a clear picture of your feelings, you’re afraid that if you go further with this, you might end up hurting him, which you absolutely do not want, “I’m still…” You shake your head, “I don’t wanna complicate things…”

“Shhhh,” he soothes, placing a long kiss on your thigh and then the other, which makes butterflies fly in your belly, before he looks up at you again, with a smile on his lips, “Don’t you worry, sweetheart… I told you before…” He brushes his hand lightly up and down your thighs, “I’m a grown ass man, I can handle my feelings…” He licks his lips and takes a piercing bite on his lower one, before aiming you a devilish dark gaze, “A grown ass man who wants a taste of that sweet pussy of yours... It’s just a taste. I missed it so bad…” he pleads, nuzzling into your mound through the fabric of your dress.

“Fuck…” your head falls back into the wall. If this is going to complicate things… you’re both adults who can deal with complications… right? You’re not that sure. All you’re sure about is the aching throb in your clit and your hands moving to lift up your dress.

Taking it as the yes that he needs, Bucky wastes no time, hastily helping you pull up the skirt of your dress up your waist. He swiftly drags the base of your underwear aside and digs in with an open mouth.

At the sensation of his wet and warm tongue on you again, shivers run up your skin to your nipples and your face contorts in a silent cry. Your hands close into tight fists, bunching tightly the fabric of your dress. 

He hooks a hand under your leg and places it over his shoulder, opening you up to him and you gasp, sneaking your fingers on his hair. He laps at your clit with a furious desire that makes your thoughts faint and your eyes shut, focusing your mind solely on the delicious mouth on you and how it brings an inferno upon your core and skin. The kind of feeling that only him can bring you, making you moan like that and kicking the air out of your lungs.

Bucky lets out a hum that vibrates all through your core and your eyes snap down to see his face shoved deep into your pussy, back and forward, while he grabs your ass and presses you harder against him. It’s like he’s desperate to taste you, to feel you, to have you all over him… and, damn… that makes you feel hotter and sexier than ever. 

“Fuck,” you whisper under a heavy breath and grabs his hair harder.

That’s when he moves away and rests his cheek on your thigh, seeming on a fight for air himself while his stare remains on your exposed sex right in front of him, “Damn you taste perfect,” he pants before turning his face to grab the soft flesh of your inner thigh in a piercing but delicious bite that makes you yelp, “So good,” he breathes again, before flattening his tongue and licking a long stripe of your pussy.

“Bucky…” you whisper, letting your head fall back while your knees shake.

“Fucking perfect,” he moves to bite your other thigh sharply, which draws out a breathy and delighted laugh out of that dies shortly in a gasp when his tongue comes back to lick your pussy with renewed hunger.

You breathe erratically and stars appear behind your lids, shut in a dreamy state while he devours you out. He doesn’t use his fingers… only his mouth is enough to bring you to a little paradise in a roof deck under construction in the middle of the city. 

Your face snaps down at him with a glare once you can’t feel the wet and soft touch of his lips anymore. But the plea that comes out of his lips in a low and seductive tone makes it all worth it.

“Fuck my face, sweetheart…”

“What?” Your eyes widen a bit, in sheer disbelief, but with a hint of eagerness speeding up your breathing even more.

“Fuck my face,” he repeats, brushing his nose on your mound before laying a kiss on the spot, “You wanna come on my mouth don’t you? I want you to come all over my face, sweetheart, please...”

Fucking please? Does he really think he needs to beg you for that, “Oh…Yes, fuck yeah, I do.” Your voice comes out almost in a grunt.

He smirks and groans in response before digging in again and pushing your hard against his face. Propped by a frenzy that rushes up your whole body, you do exactly what he asked of you. Positioning your hands on the back of his head you grind your pussy harshly up and down against him, feeling all of his beautiful face against your dripping and sensitive flesh.

His growing beard rasps against your thighs and it only makes the sensations even more intense. You can’t hold your loud moans back, that mixes up with his muffled groans, while you properly fucks his face. It’s all too much and it’s not long before you let out a strangled cry and your whole body shivers in a potent climax while you come all over his mouth and face, just like he asked.

Bucky tightens the hold on your thigh and ass, grounding you on your spot at the same time he peppers soft kisses on your mound, thighs, pussy… Your body spasms at the feeling and the aftershocks of your pleasure, until you can’t take it anymore and gathers the strength to grab his collar and pull him up to you. 

As soon as his face – glistening in your pleasure- levels yours, you steal his lips in a furious kiss. His taste is all yourself and, fuck, it drives you wild. You reach a hand down and cups his cock, moaning at feeling it hard and throbbing against your hand through his pants.

When you start gently palming it up and down, he grabs your pulse with his metal hand, stopping your moves.

Parting your lips from him, you frown, to which he answers smiling and bringing your hand to his lips, to place a kiss on it before lacing his fingers with yours and trapping your joined hands between your chests. The gesture itself is enough to make your face soften while you take in a deep breath.

“I’m gonna go home now,” he says, leisurely wiping his face with the back of his flash hand.

The frown comes back to your face, “Huh?”

He chuckles, having his face delightfully close to yours, “I’m not here to disturb you night, sweetheart. You go back and have fun with your friends, they seem great,” he brings his lips to your forehead, “You look so sexy in this dress,” he speaks with his lips on your skin, while your hands are still linked between the two of you. His flesh one, he dips beneath the hem of your dress that now has fallen over your thighs again.

You’re suddenly out of breath one more time and can’t part your eyes from him, completely in lack of words.

As for him, he skims up your thigh and leans back to look down at his hand, “You go show this whole club how beautiful and hot you are. Dance with somebody,” he suggests, nonchalantly, like he’s not just now hooking a finger under the base of your underwear that he had pushed aside, to put it back in place and cover you up.

You watch, completely entranced, while he brings his finger to his nose, his eyes fluttering shut as he sniffs and hums, before his dark blue gaze is on yours again, “Let them know how good you smell… how perfect you are.”

A strangled noise comes out of you.

He chuckles, and cups the side of your neck, placing another kiss on your forehead, “I’m getting down first, and don’t worry. I know how to be invisible… don’t wanna bring any kind of drama to your night,” he says with no sign of bitterness or anything like that on his tone.

He doesn’t mention Eddie, but you swallow dry because you know he has him in mind when he mentions “drama”.

With a smirk on his face, he winks, before locking his lips on yours in a chaste but intense kiss. Too soon he parts away, walking through the same door you two hat gotten there by, leaving you completely speechless and wrecked behind.

~~~

When you were finally out of your daze and deciding that only tomorrow you would think of the many possible consequences to what had just happened, you managed to climb down the stairs and, after a quick stopped by the bathroom to put yourself as together as one could be at that situation, you walk your stubbornly wobbly legs towards the table with your friends again.

“Where the hell were you?” Once she spots you, Maddie shouts, with no control on the volume of her voice, looking quite a bit drunk with a margarita in hands, no sign of David or Eddie around the table.

“Ahm,” you risk a glance at Taylor, who avoids looking at you and focuses on sucking her own drink from the straw, “I saw a friend from work, I went to say hello.” You clear your throat.

“Don’t you bullshit us, bitch.” This time Brianna shouts, stepping forward and pushing you on the shoulder, making you almost fall ass-first to the floor if Maddie hadn’t helped you out by grabbing your arm. “Look at you. You look thoroughly fucked. Literally.” She starts laughing loudly, as the others follow.

“Shhhh,” you shush them, holding back your own laugh, “Holy shitballs, you guys. The whole club doesn’t need to know.”

The three of them start a drunken mess of applause, cheers and shrieks at your little slip. You’re too involved with them to notice that a particular pair of ears isn’t really that far from the table and hears the whole interaction. 

~~~

To be continued...


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Old memories come back to you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hiiiii, I'll answer all your comments, I promised, been a bit hectic these last few days. I've read them all, though, I swear.

You bet that if you told anyone about the scene playing out in your apartment right now, people would scoff their asses off at your face: Saturday afternoon, your living room, the Leader of the Avengers Tech Team, the Director of SHIELD – probably the most powerful organization in the world- and one of the scariest, if not the scariest spy to ever walk on earth. All three of you sitting on your carpet, barefeet, wearing tops and tiny shorts due the heat brought by the bright sun slipping through your windows. A big bowl of popcorn in the center and innumerous chocolate bars everywhere. 

Those afternoons with the three of you are a rare event. First, you had your relationship with Eddie to blame, but now it’s mainly due to your work schedules that almost never are in sync, but whenever there’s an opportunity, there you are.

Your phone’s message alerts ringing together bursts into the conversation and the three of you grab your devices simultaneously. You were dreading to see what it was, sure it was something from work, but a huge smile widens in your lips at what you see on your screen.

“Jesus…” Nat says, while, laughing, you three turn the screens to one another, confirming you have received the same message. “Bucky’s a lost cause with that cat. That’s the millionth picture I received of her this week. And she’s always doing something extremely exciting like… sleeping.” She rolls her eyes.

“But we have to admit that little asshole is kinda cute,” Sharon comments looking back at her screen and the picture of the, indeed, sleeping cat.

“She is, right?” You agree, with a huge smile on your face. You and Alpine may have had a somewhat rough start, but you can’t help but admit she’s an adorable little jerk who’s just very protective of her human.

“By the way,” Natasha smirks at you, putting her phone back on her pocket, “I had no idea that was what he meant when he said he would romance the shit out of you.”

“It suits perfectly, though,” Sharon comments, shaking her head and laughing with her.

“It does. Shame on me, I should’ve known better.” Nat agrees. 

“He said that?” You ask with peaked interest you try to disguise in the quietness of your tone while you bite the corner of your lips.

The curiosity in the information doesn’t go unnoticed by them, who just snicker at each other. You decide to ignore that.

“The dude is smitten, Y/N, wake the fuck up.” Natasha not so gently throws a popcorn right on your face.

“Hey,” you whine.

“And so is she, giving that little dreamy look on her face. Wake the fuck up indeed.” Sharon sides with Nat with a huff.

“I’ve created two monsters…” Nat comments like you weren’t even in the room, referring to the fact she is the one who brought you two together.

“It’s not like that…” You barge in their little interaction, catching their attention, before folding your legs up and holding your knees, “I mean… yeah, of course… I can’t help having feelings for Bucky, I mean… he’s…” you pause, searching for the right words to describe him, “He’s Bucky.” You shrug… a small smile curling your lips, “He’s Bucky…” you repeat with a sigh while your gaze wanders away…

It’s just you don’t really need anything else to justify why it’s so inevitable to grow feelings for him and your friends catch on to what you mean, because when you look back at them, they both have stupid and dreamily little looks at you… ones that don’t fit to a couple of spies. 

You clear your throat, letting your initial line of thoughts come back to you, “But it’s not that simple… There’s…’ you falter.

“There’s what?” Nat insists, in a kind way.

But “Who” was the more proper pronoun.

“Eddie…” You whisper.

“Argh…” Sharon groans, tilting her face to her side before, looking back at you, “What about Eddie?”

It was just yesterday that you had your little “encounter” with Bucky. You know it was no coincidence he was there, the little shit must’ve tracked you down… but you couldn’t make yourself care about that when it was so amazing… incredible… Not only the fact that he went down on you in such a shameless way and gave you a mind-blowing orgasm, like he always does. It was also the way he spoke to you…his attitude… not really imposing himself… encouraging you to have fun with your friends… no sign of jealousy. It made you feel special and free and… loved. Really loved for who you are and not for who you make yourself to be to please and that is a tremendously powerful feeling.

Still… you have mixed feelings about it all and Eddie is the reason. Being there with him felt familiar and comfortable, but, in some way different… better than before. It makes you think that he really is engaged into finding not just a way back to you, but also a way to make your relationship work and it certainly weighs over your heart.

You tell your friends all of that.

“Did Eddie notice anything?” Nat asks, reaching over for some popcorn.

“I don’t know,” you answer, “He wasn’t at the table when I returned, but he came back shortly, my friends were still talking about it, but we changed to subject once we saw him. The girls didn’t comment anything again, and he acted normal… I guess he didn’t.” You shrug, starting to bite on your nails.

There’s an annoying little feeling rising in you since the night before and, thinking over it, you recognize it as guilt. Guilt for doing that with Bucky while Eddie was there in Club, guilt for not being bothered by Bucky’s presence, while, at least initially, you were bothered by Eddie’s, guilty for enjoying that Bucky was the one who actively made a move when Eddie didn’t, for missing him more than you missed Eddie, for feeling more positively about his change of mind than Eddie’s, for wanting Bucky more…

Guilt because you know you’re falling for him. For Bucky. And there’s little you can do to stop it.

“What is it?” Sharon asks, tightening her lips and nodding at where you’re chewing your nails.

You promptly stop, bringing your hands to around your knees again, “I guess I wasn’t expecting either of them there.” You decide not to share your most recent thoughts with them.

“You know why both of them were there. It was definitely not a coincidence.” Nat reminds you.

“I know… but it’s ok, they were polite…” You brush it off but add, quickly, fighting back a smile at the memories that flashes in your mind, “In their own way.”

“Polite? Even when Bucky had his face up your pussy?” Sharon teases, not letting that one go, and making you give in and let out a laugh while you hide your face with your hands for a moment.

“I was pretty excited to find out he was there, actually,” you admit and their faces light up, which you assume is prompted by your own expression. “It was a thrilling sensation… I can’t quite explain.”

“He really is in love with you…Bucky…” Nat tightens her lips and tilts her head.

You sigh, looking back at her, “I know…” You admit.

They both keep waiting for you to say something else but you don’t know what you could say. No… as a matter of fact, you do. You’re just not ready to put your thoughts out in the world. At first, you had your doubts if what Bucky was feeling was really that deep… but now… something has changed. You believe him. You really do. And you know you’re falling for him, too, but…

Eddie was the one you wanted for so long… you’ve made so many plans with him… Long term plans. You used to see yourself growing old with him and that’s an image that still somehow haunts your feelings. And now… the fact that guilt surrounds the feelings arising for Bucky inside you makes you feel like a cheater. You didn’t feel that when it was just sex, but now you do. And you’re damn scared.

What if you surrender to your feelings now and go to Bucky and then comes a day you’ll realize that you were wrong and Eddie will still be the one you really want? You wanted him for so long… can that really have changed? How can one let go of that feeling, that certainty of being right for each other, without being afraid of doing the wrong thing? And if that happens, if you do the wrong thing now, you will eventually hurt Bucky and that’s definitely the last thing you want.

That’s fucked up and you know it. But it’s what you’re feeling.

You keep it to yourself, though. 

~~~

It’s a few hours after the girls left your place, you take a refreshing and long bath and are about to put on a movie to relax a bit more for the rest of the evening. Maybe that way you can put your thoughts and feelings in order.

That duality of emotions is crushing your mind. You wanted some time alone and you had that… now, you can’t help the feeling that you need to come to a decision, a conclusion of some sort, you just can’t keep pushing it further. For better or for worse. Or you will lose your mind soon.

A comfort movie is in order for all the thinking you need to do, so you set “The Prisoner of Azkaban” on your TV before you head to the kitchen. You’re still pretty full of all the junk food the three of you made a feast of the whole afternoon, so you decide to prepare just an old recipe of peach iced tea your mom has taught you. Perfect for the hot weather, too.

You’ve just added the ice in the jar when your intercom rings. You frown wondering who could that be and check your phone for any missed calls or messages, finding none before answering the intercom.

“Yeah? Oh… no, yeah, sure, come up.” You press the button to let him in. Your heart beats just slightly faster, wondering what could he possibly be doing there.

“Hi,” he greets, once you open the door after he pressed the ringer.

“Hi,” you answer, and without even thinking, just keep staring at him, blocking his way into your apartment while he stands at your door, holding a big box in his hands.

“Can I come in?” He asks, when you say nothing else. 

“Oh, yeah, of course, sorry.” You step aside, allowing Eddie to walk into your living room with a tight smile on his lips. 

“Please,” you gesture towards your sofa and he nods, walking with you over there, “I was about to pour me some iced tea, would you like some?” You offer, tentativeness still present in your tone, while the big box secured in his hands grasps your attention for a second. 

“Your mom’s recipe?” He asks, his whole face lightening up as he takes his seat.

You chuckle and nod.

“Oh, hell yeah, then.”

You take just a little longer than you actually need to fix the tea for the two of you in the kitchen. For some reason, his presence, after the night before, what you did with Bucky and after you coming to terms that you are, indeed, growing feelings for the other guy… it just unsettles you.

After taking a deep breath or two, you come back to the living room. Some small conversation ensues while you take a seat by his side and you two drink from the tea you’ve just prepared.

“Ahm…What’s that?” At some point you give in to the curiosity and nod towards the box now on your center table.

He smiles, before placing his cup on your table and taking the box in his hands. He shifts on the sofa, making room for placing it on one of the cushions between the two of you. “I was taking a look at it at home earlier, it just… I couldn’t help myself… and decided to come by to show you.”

When he opens the lid, placing it aside, you take in the contents, which makes your heart beat a bit funny at the surprise. You recognize pictures of the two of you, letters, a few souvenirs… All of them represent a memory of your relationship. 

“Oh…” you say. You know all that stuff had been stashed in some place, but you never knew he had taken them with him once he moved out.

“Yeah…” Eddie brushes the back of his neck, peering at you from beneath his lashes, “I guess I really wasn’t that confident about my decision when I left…” he shrugs, looking down at the box again, “I just couldn’t leave it behind.”

You give him a tightened and brief smile, before placing your teacup on the table and starting to fumble through the items inside the box. You let out a breathy laugh when you find a picture of the day you two have met… he had founded a study group on advanced software creating techniques and you were the only one to show up.

“Oh my God…” you laugh.

“Yeah… what a couple of nerds,” Eddie chuckles, looking at the picture.

He helps you through the shuffling when you go through some more pictures from college, his family, your family… the day you two closed the deal to buy the apartment… the letter you received when you were both accepted in the Avengers tech team…

You feel the tears gathering in your eyes before they start silently rolling down your cheeks… It’s a weird sensation, it’s like meeting with an old part of yourself, an old friend. One that has never really left, but you almost don’t recognize anymore… leading to a nostalgic and longing feeling.

They’re all good memories stashed on that box… of course… you guess no one is really keen to proposedly keep a souvenir from the bad ones… but that’s not on what your focus lays right now. Your attention is caught by a particular thing from the box. A small gasp escapes your lungs at the sight.

You look up at Eddie, whose eyes have been intensely trained on you, before you grab the object in your hands.

It’s a scrapbook you two have made through college years. While you silently and carefully go through the pages your life passes in front of your eyes. Movie and concert tickets… more pictures… a few drawings… software ideas you had together… little notes you’ve written to each other… and then, on the very last couple of pages, there they are.

You remember them. The day you two decided to write a letter to each other, telling how you wanted your future to be.

You roam your fingers through the frayed papers… you don’t have to read them again to know what’s there. You remember. Without knowing, in the end you two had written the exact same thing in both letters… among other small stuff, you two wrote you wanted a kick ass job, live in the city in an apartment of your own… and stay together forever.

Your watery gaze follows when Eddie slides down to the floor and kneels before you, taking your hands in his, “I meant every word then and I still do,” he says, softly, staring deeply into your eyes, “I can’t see my future without you… I just can’t.” He shakes his head, before it drops.

You see how his lips twist before he looks up at you again, with a saddened look on his face, “I know how that guy makes you feel…”

Your body freezes just as your heart does and you feel the precise moment when it splits in two. That heavy sensation comes back to your chest when the image of Bucky pops into your mind and suddenly there are two lives running before your eyes. One there, with Eddie, with everything you’ve ever dreamed of… the other running straight into Bucky’s arms and leaving all of that behind.

And you know there’s only one right for you.

You’re brought back to reality by the sound of Eddie’s voice.

“I- I know about what happened last night, I, ahm, I’ve heard the girls…” he stammers but holds his hold on your hands when you shift on your seat and he senses your discomfort. “No… it’s ok. “I know it’s new… it’s exciting…” he continues, nodding and hastily licking his lips, “And you deserve to explore that. You do… it’s ok.” He puts on a small smile, “But I want you to know that I’m here. I’m waiting for you. I’m waiting for us… for our future. No matter how long it takes. How much fun you need to have with that guy before you realize what I already know.” He smiles wider, “Because I know you and I are it. We’ve always been it.”

You’re frowning while looking down at him. His words making their way into your senses. 

You free one hand of his secured hold to reach over and cup his smiling face.

He leans into your touch.

You make a decision.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hearts are broken.

There’s that annoying little chilling feeling running down his spine while Bucky parks his bike on the nearest parking lot to your building and steps towards your place. Not the dreadful feeling he gets on missions when his life or others’ are in danger. No, not that one. Is that feeling he gets when he knows something’s up, something’s out of order, not necessarily bad, but something that he needs to put his focus on…

He’s been trying to hold himself from going to your place, he knows that it may sound like he’s imposing himself in your personal space, in your life, but he’s been trying to call you in the last few hours, sent a few messages but you haven’t answered and then that annoying little feeling came to say hello.

And in his long ass life, he’s learned better than to ignore that feeling. He knows you’re not at work because it’s a Sunday and maybe you just went out somewhere without your phone and he’s just being paranoid or something… But he’ll just check if you’re ok, see those pretty eyes of yours and leave. That’s it. He may seem like a fucking stalker, but if that is going to assure him you’re ok, then so be it.

And God knows how much he would appreciate a glimpse of you right now.

The little hairs on his neck stand in attention at the sight he catches from the corner of your street and brings him to a full stop. That short little asshole of your ex, dragging a big suitcase with one hand and holding a couple of boxes with the other.

Bucky’s heart races and he frowns, watching when that Eddie guy lets go of the suitcase and balances himself to not let the boxes fall while he types the code to open the front door, getting into your building right after, dragging the suitcase with him.

The air catches in Bucky’s throat before it comes out in short little breaths. His mind runs with all the possible scenarios that would explain that scene… he desperately searches for ones that don’t have to mean what his jumping heart is telling him it means.

He’s not thinking clearly through the mess that his mind has become, but he decides he needs to see it for himself, as dreadful as he is of what he’s going to see.

In a few long and quick steps he’s at the building’s door, typing the numbers he’s just registered the douchebag typing and in a second he’s in the elevator up to your floor.

Once he’s at your door, ready to knock on the wood, his hand stops midair, before it drops to his side while he sighs. Deeply. This is madness… he shouldn’t be here. He doesn’t need to see anything, he can wait and talk to you some other time, when he’s less… anguished… anxious… He knows what he’s thinking, but it doesn’t mean that’s the case. You and the guy had lived together for years… maybe he’s just returning some of your stuff… maybe… damn… he brushes his hand over his face, harshly. He should leave.

And he’s about to do exactly that when the door opens.

Bucky has been calling the guy a short little asshole all this time and, while he still may be an absolute jackass and Bucky surely and easily beats him in height, somehow he feels like the smallest person on earth standing in front of the man right now.

“Can I help you?” Eddie asks, hardening his face after an immeasurable moment of stunned silence between the two men.

“Ahm,” Bucky clears his throat and keeps his voice firm, “Can I talk to Y/N?” 

Eddie lets out a small puff and God knows how much Bucky needs to hold himself back from punching that stupid little face, “She’s not home, she had a call for something at work,” Eddie answers plainly.

Bucky feels when his jaw tightens painfully and his chest puffs, “Then what the hell are you doing here?” His voice comes out dangerously low as his chin tips up.

A little and annoying smirk twists Eddie’s lips and… fuck, Bucky has a terrible feeling about that. “Not that I need to give you any explanation but I’m moving back. This is my home again.” He regards Bucky for a second after adding, “Our home.”

The words punch the air out of Bucky’s lungs and, looking behind Eddie’s shoulder he sees the numerous boxes… your place… where he had you in his arms so many times now filled with that guy’s stuff next to your things… His stomach churns violently.

“Are you… are you and Y/N...” he can’t even finish the question, the words getting stuck in his throat, choking him like a deadly poison.

“Listen, dude…” Eddie bursts out, “What Y/N and I have isn’t some kind of fling or deal or whatever one small time apart can destroy, we belong together.” He huffs and bites his cheek before continuing impatiently, while all Bucky can do is stare at him, frozen in place, ”I have no time for this. If you have questions you can ask her whenever you want, if she has anything to explain to you, she will. Now if you excuse me.” He gestures towards the elevator.

Bucky would rather die a thousand times before he would allow himself to continue showing a single more minute of vulnerability in front of that guy… so he sucks it all down his throat and, holding himself in the excruciating pain rushing up his chest like it’s an anchor, he puts on a hard face and just nods, stepping away while he meets, for the first time, the ache he knows is the feeling of his heart breaking.

~~~

At the sight before her, Natasha sighs and remembers the time when she would find much different scenarios when she would burst into Bucky’s place. Where she would usually find different underwear tossed around the floor and small parties in his room, now she sees a metal armed dude sprawled on the sofa, face deep into not one, but two huge pints of Stark Raving Hazelnuts from Ben & Jerry’s, while Home Alone plays on the TV, and an Alpine lays comfortably on his lap.

Her little head perks up once Nat’s steps into the room. At least one of them acknowledges her presence. 

“Jesus, Bucky...”

He then moves his gaze to her direction, showing off his puffed eyes while shoving a huge spoon of ice-cream in his mouth, “What?” He speaks with a mouthful, “Breakfast?” He makes an offering gesture with the pint.

“I see you at least put on your uniform,” Nat ignores the offer, stepping towards him, kicking aside the many remains and open packages of junk food on her way. She slaps his leg off the sofa so she can sit beside him. As he grumpily adjusts his position to give her room, an equally grumpy Alpine jumps off his lap and aims a gaze of sheer contempt at Nat, before sauntering towards her plate of food in the kitchen. 

“Well… Show must go on, right?” Bucky answers while his saddened gaze fixes on the tv again.

Nat just stares at him for a moment, her heart twisting in sorrow at his miserable demeanor, “Listen…” she says, with a softer tone, “I checked, she really is on a mission.” At that, she spots the twitch on his jaw, but he doesn’t look back at her, “Apparently it was some last-minute thing about Thor and earthly technology.” Nat frowns and shrugs, “That’s probably the reason why she’s not picking up your calls or mine for the last couple of days. She’s just busy. You can talk to her when she comes back.”

“Why?” He puts the pints of ice cream aside as his face snaps at her.

Despite the initial harshness on his tone, there’s no trace of anger there on his expression. Just… sadness… and, honestly, Nat would deal better with the anger. She’s never seen Bucky like this… not after he came back from Wakanda.

Bucky breathes in a shuddering breath, like it’s painful for him to even do that before he continues speaking, “The guy is back to her place, Nat… all his fucking boxes and clothes and shit next to hers. They’re back together. That’s it. I honestly don’t wanna listen to her telling me how much that guy matters to her…” His voice cracks, but he goes on talking, “That she and I was fun, I was a good fuck and all but not good enough compared to ten years with that…” He huffs, “That douchebag. I don’t wanna hear her saying he’s the real deal and not me.” He bites on his cheek, looking at Nat with eyes becoming glossy, “I just don’t think I can.”

“Bucky…”

“Ugh, no, seriously Nat, fuck,” he growls while he narrows his eyes and his jaw tightens, “Seriously, that guy… if he only… shit… he doesn’t deserve her.” Indignance pours out of his voice, which comes out through his teeth while his hands clench into fists, “He doesn’t appreciate what he has… ugh…” He groans, and lets himself fall back into the sofa, “But…” He sighs, and nods, licking his lips, “If that’s what she wants… I’m not gonna try and take it away from her. I won’t.” He shrugs.

Like she’s sensing the distress in her human, Alpine materializes on the sofa, between Nat and Bucky, and lets out a meow before curling herself against his thigh. Bucky absentmindedly starts petting her neck, staring up to the ceiling.

Nat could hear the pain of his heart shattering through his words. As for her… regret creeps up inside her. Regret for starting this between Bucky and you. She had a feeling that things could go south, but in all the scenarios she pictured for that, Bucky being the one heartbroken definitely wasn’t one of them. And yet, there he is. Devastated. Completely fucked. In a way she never thought she would see him for… love.

Damn… 

“Are you guys ready?”

The three of them turn towards the voice, spotting Steve there, in his full gear and his signature worried and yet soft look that belongs to Bucky.

“Yup,” Bucky taps on his thighs and grabs Alpine in one hand, who meows loudly, and two suitcases, one bigger and one smaller with the other one.

“Are you seriously taking her with us?” Nat checks, following him towards the door.

“Wherever I go, she goes,” he answers, his voice as down as his face.

“Buck,” Steve puts his hand on his friend’s shoulder, stopping him at the door, “Are you sure you’re ok to go on the mission, I can-“

“I’m fine, punk,” Bucky cuts him off, “I’m a grown ass man, I can handle my feelings.” 

As Bucky walks past his friend and moves to the elevator, Nat exchanges looks with Steve. She’s heard Bucky saying that exact sentence numerous times lately, after he acknowledged the way he feels for you.

The difference is that the usual confidence is just not there anymore.

~~~

You’re frowning while looking down at him. His words making their way into your senses.   
You free one hand of his secured hold to reach over and cup his smiling face.  
He leans into your touch.  
You make a decision.  
Your heart and mind are finally set together in what you now know you want. Hell… you think you know this for a while, but now… with Eddie bringing all those memories and telling you all of that, it did help you get through the split in your heart and mend it back into one. A whole new heart.

One that is all his.  
His.  
“Eddie,” your voice is soft, while he smiles up at you, “I remember all of that.” You smile, too, referring to the box of memories next you, “Every single memory… everything we shared… those ten years… they helped me mold me into what I am. There’s no me, there’s no what I am today without them,” you state, while, with your thumb, you caress his cheek.

Eddie nods, “There’s no me without you, either, that’s why I’m here.”

“But, Eddie…” you sigh and lick you lips, “Remember how you’ve told me a couple of times I seem different?”

The smile on Eddie's face slowly drops.

“That’s because I am… I’m not just… I’m not just that anymore.” You nod towards the box, “I found out there’s more in me, and honestly, I think there’s more in you, too, that just doesn’t fit to what we used to be anymore.”

He blinks repeated times, staring up at you, and you lean even closer and cup both sides of his face. 

“I’m sorry. This is all part of who I am. You’re part of who I am. But I can’t go back.” You shake your head, “I can’t.” 

He keeps his stare on you and, after a moment, like he’s been processing what you said to him, he lets out a huff, “Are you serious?” he harshly pulls your hands away from his face and gets up, “Are you fucking serious? Is this because you’re fucking that guy?” He raises his voice, gesturing away.

“Eddie…” You tilt your head as a warning sign.

“No, seriously, you’re trading me, you’re trading us for what?” He spits and points to his chest while his face contorts into something ugly you’ve never seen on him before, “A player who will throw you in the trash for the next nicer piece of ass he sees? For what? A good fuck? An eight pack? A few more inches of dick? Come on…”

“Hey,” you snap, rushing up from your seat to level him, “What the fuck, Eddie?” You curse, as he stares back at you defiantly, “First of all you don’t get to talk to me like that, you lower you goddamn tone.” You point a finger at him, “And, honestly? Bucky is not just “that guy” to me. He’s not a player. You don’t know him, and you don’t know who I am with him, you could never know.”

Through the anger bringing red blurs to your vision, you see when his Adam bone bobs, but he keeps an insolent chin lifted up and he has struck something in you by talking about Bucky and your feelings for him in such a belittling way. 

“I didn’t want things to end like that,” you continue, shaking your head, “I really didn’t, but if you’re talking shit you don’t know the first thing about… ugh… fuck that,” you let out a harsh breath, “In one month or so Bucky respected and appreciated me more than you did in ten years. With him I don’t have to pretend I like or don’t like things just not to upset him or whatever, I learned I can be fun and honest… and… and he fucking eats my pussy, for God’s sake,” you burst out in a rush of spite.

Eddie takes a step back, completely stunned by your words and outburst, while a dead silence settles in the room.

“Wow,” he mumbles nodding his head and looking away from you.

You shut your eyes and breathe in deeply, letting your head drop for a moment, while reason starts to come back to your senses, “Shit… shit…” You curse under your breath, looking up at him again, “This is not about that, Eddie…” you say, being honest with him and yourself, “I loved you, I really did, you are so important… I appreciate our time together so much… but now…” You press your lips in a taut line and shrugs, “It’s over…And, yeah… Bucky may be in my life now, but-“

He snorts, crossing his arms in front of his chest. There’s pure scorn in his gaze for you, but you decide to ignore that. Eddie really matters a lot to you and you don’t want to end it in such a bad note. You want closure for the two of you, so both of you can accept what you had is over and move on with your lives. 

“But this is not about him. Not completely, at least,” you continue, “It’s us Eddie.” You plead, taking a step closer to him, “Our relationship meant the world, but… but I think we outgrew it-”

“You speak for yourself,” he spits.

You sigh at the anger that is still there, spilling through his voice, but you nod, and speaks softly, “Ok, then… I outgrew our relationship, but even if you think you haven’t, that doesn’t mean it would be good for you to insist on something you realized at some point it wasn’t what you wanted anymore. You can’t deny that.” 

You gasp and try to keep your balance when he drops on his knees and latches himself at you, hugging your waist tightly, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I know I caused all this, but please don’t leave me, don’t give up on us,” he begs, his voice breaking, pressing his cheek on you, “Please… please.”

“Eddie… Eddie…” You try catching his attention, as he keeps his chant of remorseful and begging words, “Stop... stop, Eddie, come here.”

You reach down for his forearms, adding some force to pull him up, to which he lets you. 

When his weeping face levels yours, you gently wipe the tears falling down with your fingers, “You ended this because you weren’t happy, either, and it’s ok. It’s ok to let go,” you say, gently, before cupping his face and fixing your gaze on his, “Let go, Eddie. Let go.”

He exhales, his eyes shutting. While you keep gentle hands on his face, he brings his forehead to yours.

“We’re gonna be ok,” you whisper, wishing that he would understand that moving on is the best thing for the two of you.

At that, he harshly parts himself from you. Hurt and rejection plastered all over his face while he averts his gaze from you.

“Eddie… I don’t know what else to say,” you heave a sigh. 

Before he gives you the comeback he’s about to give you, which you know it wasn’t gonna be a nice one, your phone rings. Nick Fury’s ringtone.

“Shit,” you curse, “I’m sorry, I need to pick that.” You rush and reach out for your phone on the center table, “Yes, Sir… of course… absolutely. I’ll gather my team and will be there in one hour, tops. Alright.”

“It’s work…” you tell Eddie, looking down as you turn off your phone.

“On a fucking Saturday night?” Eddie scoffs, not looking at you.

“Thor is on a solo mission and needs assistance from my team. Fury asked me to lead it. I…” You look at him, but he doesn’t look back at you, “I need to go change,” you say, defeated by his refusal to engage with you or with what you’ve been trying to tell him so far.

Once you come back from your bedroom in a hurry and ready to leave, Eddie is there in the living room, now sitting on the sofa.

“Are you sure?” He asks once you walked over the sofa and met his dull gaze.

“Yes.”

He nods slowly, biting his cheek.

“I’m gonna need to go now, Eddie,” you tentatively say. You step closer to him, but he turns his face to the other side and you take the hint. Stopping on your track.

“What of this place?” He gestures around.

You look around the place you two got together and as from that moment, you don’t see yourself in it anymore. Satisfied with your decision, you walk towards the key hook on the wall and he watches as you come closer to him again and take his hand from his lap, putting the keys in his palm.

“This place is not mine anymore,” you give him a tight smile.

You hold his hand a little longer while his gaze lingers at where you’re touching him.

“Goodbye, Eddie,” you say.

When he doesn’t give you an answer or even spares a look your way, you sigh, deeply. If that’s how he wants it to go, so be it. Letting go of his hand you walk to the door.

As soon as you step aside from your now former home, you realize you’re also walking towards a new phase of your life and you take in a big and refreshing breath before a loose smile forms in your lips. There’s only one thing in your mind, now. Or better, one person.

Bucky. 

~~~


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The end.

It’s a funny feeling to have to knock on the door which you’ve spent so long mindlessly walking right through after opening it with your own key. Yeah, it’s funny… but also a surprisingly liberating and exciting sensation. It’s just like a feeling of meeting someone new living inside you. Or someone you just didn’t know was already there, waiting for you to acknowledge them. But a great deal of what you were and had just feels foreign to you now. Like that door to your place, except this isn’t your place anymore, so you knock on the wood softly and wait to be allowed to come in.

You don’t have to wait long as you’ve barely knocked and the door is opened, with Eddie appearing in front of you.

“Hi, you’re back,” he lets out a breathy smile, a tad of nervousness on his voice.

“Hi…” you tighten your lips, not knowing how to react to the excited “you’re back” that has just blurted out of his lips. You want things with Eddie to go as smoothly as possible and you definitely don’t want another argument. Not now when you’re so eager to just do what you have to do there and then go find Bucky, “Ahm…I’ve just come back from the mission and checked in to a hotel, I need to grab some of my stuff. If you don’t mind.”

“Oh…” disappointment hardens his face as his chin lifts up, “Alright. Come in,” he nods, stepping aside.

With tentative moves, you enter your former home before Eddie shuts the door behind him, “Ahm…Can you believe I forgot my phone?” You chuckle lightly, nodding at the device on the center table in the living room, “I had to use the company’s one the entire time.” You comment, reaching over for your phone and attaching it to the Stark mobile battery charger.

As Eddie leans back against the door, you ignore the intensive and unsettling stare he holds on you while your phone’s screen lights up. You rush to check your missed calls and your heart skips a beat when you find out several of them from Bucky. Did you really have to be so stupid about forgetting your phone there?

Your eyes lift from your phone to Eddie for a moment while a thought crosses your mind… Did he see those calls? Could he have answered one of them? No… Eddie and you might not be on the best of terms right now, but you know his character, he wouldn’t…

“Your boy toy wouldn’t stop calling,” he says, his voice as bitter as his words, “Until he decided to drop by.”

“What?” You barely whisper as your heart rushes in your chest. “Bucky?”

Eddie scoffs, uncrossing his arms and leaning away from the door, “Yeah… Bucky…Bucky Soft Tongue Barnes,” he says the name you have in your contacts for Bucky in a mocking tone, “Do you have another boy toy by any chance? Dear God, Y/N…”

You register the vicious mockery coming from him, but you don’t even care while your eyes roam around the room, spotting all of the boxes with Eddie’s stuff next to your stuff, “What did he want?” You ask, your breathing becoming erratic at the possible outcomes from that encounter.

“The fuck I know.” He shrugs, walking over you, “He didn’t stay long.”

“What did you tell him, Eddie?” Your head tilts while you ask in an almost defeated tone, fingers gripping your phone hard.

His face hardens even more now that he’s right in front of you, “I told him the truth, that this is our home.” He gestures around before lunging at you and grabbing your arm, pulling you close to him, “And that what you and I have isn’t just a shitty deal with a boy toy that can be destroyed by a small and unimportant glitch.” He spits.

Your vision turns into a blur while a thick lump of pure anger lodges in your throat. You harshly pull your arm and, expressing a strength you didn’t even know you had, you push him, making him trip backwards, “Fuck you, Eddie.” You push him again, this time even stronger, making his ass fall to the ground, staring up at you with big and incredulous eyes that makes you anger even bigger, “Fuck you, I thought we could’ve salvage something of our relationship, become respectful with each other at least, for our history’s sake,” you scoff pointing down at him, ”But I see now there’s just no fucking point.” You shake your head while your teeth clench.

As you move to step past him, he swiftly stands up and grabs your elbow again. “Y/n, please… don’t go. We can talk-”

“Fuck off, Eddie.” You shake your arm away, untangling it from his hold once and for all, “I have no time to waste talking to you.” You hurriedly move towards the way out, but before you leave the place, you turn back to him, “And just so you know, he’s not my boy toy, or a shitty deal, he’s the fucking love of my life.” You state, slamming the door on your way out. 

~~~

“Goddammit, Bucky, is it too much to ask for you to wait for us, you’re being too careless,” Steve chastises through the comms.

“I told you… we should’ve brought Sam.” Nat’s voice comes to his ears.

“Fuck off, Romanoff. And you, too, Punk. You’re the last person who can say anything about being careless on missions.” Bucky hisses, being way ahead of his partners in exploring the alleged facility they are supposed to turn down from some assholes, A.I.M is what they called themselves. The third facility from that mission. Gun machine pointed ahead, he kicked open another door, finding nothing in the room again, “Besides, this place is dead, that was probably a false lead.”

“No, it wasn’t.” Nat, the receiver of the lead, scoffs, “And you would know that if you had stayed for briefing before jumping out of the quinjet in your bike, like fucking Mad Max.”

“Bucky!”  
The loud voice on his ears, not Nat’s voice and definitely not Steve’s, makes him halt at once before he can kick open the next door.

“Y/N?” He frowns, not trusting his ears.

“Oh, shit.” Now, that’s definitely Steve and Nat talking in unison.

“Bucky, thank God. Finally. I need to talk to you.”

Bucky notices the relief but also the urgency in your voice. It doesn’t help him at all to figure out what the hell it’s happening, but he registers his heart racing by listening to your voice.

“Y/N?” He repeats himself, “What the hell? Where are you? Are you ok?” The thought that maybe some way you ended up as a hostage in that mission brings a lump to his stomach and his heart beats even faster.

“Yes, I’m mean, no… not really,” you speak quickly, “I’m safe, but I need to talk to you. I’m heading to the safe house designated for this mission right now. I’m gonna wait for you there.”

“What?” Bucky’s mind races trying to understand what the hell it’s happening. “I can’t… I-I have nothing to talk to you about.” He steadies his voice when he feels it faltering. 

He hears a scoff that he knows it’s Nat’s, but he says nothing, ignoring the nosey fuckers.

“Bucky… please,” you plead, the desperation present in your tone, “You have no idea how many codes I had to break find you and to get here.”

Fuck…

“You’re having a hard on right now, aren’t you?” Nat asks, breaking through the silence with amusement on her voice.

“He always had a weakness for the smart ones.” Steve comments. Whispering. Like that would help the jerk to remain unnoticed.

“You two stay fucking quiet over there,” Bucky chastises – even though neither of them were lying - while he listens to you clearing your throat, “What do you need to talk about?” He addresses you again, a bit too harshly, already regretting that reaction, but allowing the little bit of spite inside his heart to lead him on, “Is your fiancé there with you?” He clenches his teeth, “Y/N listen, I don’t want explanations, or pity-“

“Fiancé?” You practically screech into his ears, “Pity? Hell, no. It’s not what you’re thinking. Not at all. Eddie lied to you. That’s why I’m here, we need… we need to talk. There’s so much I need to say to you.”

“Like what?” Bucky whispers, heart jumping inside his chest. The fucker lied to him? Does that mean…

“Like I love you.” You burst out, punching the air out of his lungs, “Like I fucking fell in love with you and now you’re thinking I don’t, and I can’t wait another second to tell you everything I’m feeling.”

“What?” He checks, once again in barely a whisper, once again not trusting his ears.

“I love you, ok? I love you, Bucky.” You repeat, trying to speak with a calmer tone, but uneasiness still sweeps into your words.

Silence settles on his comms. No more words from you or from the snooping couple he knows is still there, listening to everything, as well. All he can listen to is his heart, frantically pounding against his chest.

“Meet you at the safe house?” You tentatively ask after a long moment of stillness.

That’s the precise moment the door in front of Bucky opens and he meets with a room full of armed assholes.

“I’ll be there in 15.” He states firmly, pointing his gun ahead.

In precisely seven minutes he has almost the entire room on the floor. He’s about to break the last man standing’s arm when Nat and Steve come running into the room. 

“Fucking hell,” Nat exclaims, taking in the place.

“We’ll take it from here, now you go to that goddamn safe house,” Steve says with a teary beam – the big softie - and points to the way out.

Like hell Bucky would waste another second.

~~~

He’s been inside the place for several minutes already, which seems like an eternity, legs quivering while he sits on the first dusted armchair he’s seen, he’s biting on his nails when he hears the knock on the door.

Not two seconds and he has the door opened, meeting with the sight of you. Panting and disheveled and perfect. And he freezes. Not one muscle inside him moves. Except for his stupid mouth.

“You love me,” he says, spontaneously, the words mindlessly coming out of his lips like in a dream.

You’re visibly taken aback at the line as you gasp and your eyes widen a fraction.

Shit… What the hell is wrong with him? He swiftly clears his throat, “Ahm, hi,” he manages to say, praying that somehow, he could erase that first sentence.

“Hi,” you answer, still clearly nervous, fidgeting with your fingers, but not taking your anxious eyes away from him, until you take in a harsh breath, “Yes, yes, I love you,” you burst out, while you suddenly step inside the place, walking past him, “I’ve been so stupid, but I was confused,” you drop your purse on the floor and, gesticulating and shaking your head, continue, “I-I thought I wasn’t sure about you, and then I was afraid I was gonna hurt you, but ended up hurting you anyway. God, I wanna kill Eddie, but no, I’m not here to talk about him,” you pace around, your trembling hands all over the place.

While you keep your rumbling confession, you miss Bucky slowly making his way to you.

“I’m here to talk about us, I mean… if you still feel how you told me you felt, I mean… after what Eddie told you, I don’t know if you still feel the same way, but I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I had work to do, and I forgot my stupid phone, I-”

You sulk in a breath when Bucky is right in front of you. Staring intently into your eyes. You inhale some needed air, slowly, “I love you,” you say again, “I had no idea things would go this way, I didn’t even know that love could feel like this, so…” you search for the word taking another breath, “so damn wonderful. But it does, and I love you, I do. So much. I had a whole speech prepared, but that’s it. I love you.” You shrug.

Still unable to move a muscle or utter a word, Bucky keeps staring at you, like he’s in some sort of trance.

“Ahm…” You gulp, “Don’t you wanna maybe, ahm, say something?” Your voice falters, before you bite your lower lip, as if it’s getting hard for you to breathe.

“Sweetheart,” Bucky finally speaks, and, with the word choice, he can see the smile that threatens to curl your lips, but just don’t get through because you’re still clearly too nervous to allow yourself to smile, “I love hearing you talk.” He steps closer, seriousness all over his voice, “I could listen to you all day, all my life, but right now, I really want to kiss you, ok?”

That smile fully curls your lips now and Bucky smiles, too, but it’s short lived and replaced by a “humpf” as you jump on him and crash your lips on his.

He catches you and the craving you two feel for each other are expressed in the urgency of the kiss. Fingers grasp his locks. While you pull him by the neck, he pulls you by the waist, fireworks on his brain and his guts, pure longing for the proximity of his girl. His love.

Having you like that, kissing you, holding you, knowing how you feel about him is dazzling, mind-blowing, his senses falter and next thing he knows he’s sitting on the armchair with you across his lap.

Smiles surge through the kiss before you part from his lips, only to pepper kisses all over his face… neck… lips again, “I love you, I love you,” you repeat like a mantra between kisses, holding him with a strength he didn’t even know you possessed.

“God… sweetheart… I love you. You have no idea how much. You can never hurt me, don’t ever say that again. I love you,” he breathes, you thinking that you had hurt doesn’t go unnoticed by him, if only you could see how his poor heart is melting inside his chest with all the love he’s feeling and receiving from you.

His breath hitches when your teeth graze his neck, “I missed you…” You whisper, your voice becoming dangerously low while your hand wanders through his thigh, “And I missed this.” Your hand meets his crotch, caressing the bulge forming there, making Bucky’s brain short-circuit, “You’re so gonna love make up sex… I believe I have a lot of making up to do with Little Bucky.” You bite his earlobe, putting a bit of more friction over his bulge.

“Fuck… shit…” Bucky curses, “I want it so damn much, sweetheart, you have no idea how much, but, ahm…” He clears his throat, “Not in front of the baby.”

You lean back and frown at him, “Huh?”

Bucky wiggles his eyebrows and nods behind you.

You follow his gaze and there is Alpine. Seated on the carpet. Staring up at them, in all her confident and glorious demeanor. 

“Oh.” You swiftly remove your hands from his pants. Suppressing a laugh in your lips, you turn to Bucky again, “What is Alpine doing here in the safe house from your very Avengey mission?”

“Yeah…” Bucky tickles his tongue before tightening his lips, holding you on his lap by your waist, “You know… she just can’t leave my side anymore. “

“Of course,” you put on a mocking frowning expression, nodding your head, “She is the one who can’t leave your side, yeah…” You chuckle.

He’s got a guilty smile on his lips, but before he can offer you a comeback, a meow catches your attention before Alpine jumps on your lap.

Bucky feels the tension on your body by the surprise as you stare down at the white cat. 

“Bucky… Bucky…” you barely whisper, not moving your body in the slightest, while Alpine sniffs your hand before curling down comfortably on your lap.

“Oh my God,” You breathe and aim a disbelieved, yet incredibly satisfied smile at Bucky, still not moving a muscle as if you would break the spell if you did.

“I told her she would love you,” Bucky shrugs, feeling no surprise at all. He removes the arm from around your belly to allow Alpine to accommodate herself better.

“Aww, Bucky,” you coo, looking down and scratching behind Alpine’s ear, whose eyes shut at the petting, “You’re one protective little girl, aren’t you?” You address her, before turning to Bucky again, “I bet she knows I’m sure about you now, and there’s nothing she needs to worry about.”

“Is that so?” Bucky grins.

“That's so.” You nod, leaning over to place a kiss on his cheek, “Although, I gotta be honest…” You say, leaning back, with a smirk, “I thought it would be harder to win you over now.”

“Sweetheart…” Bucky puffs with a scorning expression, shaking his head, “The sooner you learn this the better: I’m a sucker for you.”

Your smile widens and you lean in to kiss him, but something catches your eyes behind his shoulder, “Ahm… is that my perfume?” You frown at the familiar bottle peeking out of his backpack thrown on the floor behind him.

Bucky doesn’t even look behind him, knowing he’s just been caught while you look back at him with amusement growing in your expression.

“Bucky Barnes, did you buy my perfume?” You ask with a gleeful voice.

Well, he better might as well use his armory, too, and, using the same tone of yours, he asks, “Is my name on your phone “Bucky Soft Tongue Barnes?”

You gasp, “How do you…” you start to ask, but doesn’t need to finish as you squint, “Nat…” You say in defeat.

Bucky laughs, while absentmindedly running a hand over Alpine’s back on your lap. “Face it. We’re a couple of creeps, sweetheart.”

You smile sweetly at him, “Yeah… But you’re my creep.” You lean over and peck his lips.

The sound of the door being burst open makes you yelp and almost fall from Bucky’s lap. He catches you steadily, while you hold Alpine protectively.

“Hello, lovebirds.” Nat has a smug smile on her face.

“Jesus, when will this ever stop?” Bucky glares at her, while you try to recover your breath.

“This is getting ridiculous,” you add, not bothered to leave your position on Bucky’s lap.

“Are they decent?” Steve’s voice is heard from the outside.

“Physically, yes. Morally? Never.” Nat answers, her smirk widening while she walks inside.

Steve then comes behind her, with a proud and excited smile on his lips.

“I knew this thing would work out,” Nat says, finger waving between you two.

You and Bucky look at each other and scoff, before you turn to her, “No, you didn’t. You were fucking terrified.”

Like a perfect eight-year-old and not the greatest spy on earth, Nat crosses her arms and, squinting, shows off her tongue at you.

And that’s when Alpine, still in your arms after the scare Nat gave you, hisses at her in her very peculiar and protective way. While Nat raises an eyebrow at her, your jaw drops and you exchange excited looks with Bucky before you smugly pet the cat’s head and tell her what a good girl she is.

Bucky decides, right then and there, having his two girls in his arms, that he’s the happiest bastard on the planet.

~~~

He is the one who knocks on the door while he holds your hand tightly. Bucky looks at you and smiles. When you look and smile back at him, he wonders if his heart would ever stop altogether at that sight, cause it sure feels like it every single time.

“Hey, oh-“ Eddie gulps down his words when he sees you at his door along with Bucky.

He obviously wasn’t expecting Bucky to be there, too, and it brings a smirk to Bucky’s lips, his fingers intertwined with yours. 

“Can I get my stuff now?” You ask and the sheer disdain in your voice could be enough to make Bucky hard right then and there, but he focuses on the glare on his face at the stupid short asshole in front of him.

Eddie’s gaze lifts from the joined hands before he looks at you and nods, an astonished expression on his face.

The scowl on your expression eases when you look back at Bucky with a smile, “Wait for me?”

“Sure sweetheart, call my name if you need me.” He smiles back before you lean in and peck his lips in front of Eddie.

Oh… his mischievous girl.

Without sparing one glance at the man on the other side of the door, you walk past him towards your former bedroom.

At the very same second Eddie makes a move to go after you, his shoulder is swiftly pushed against the doorframe by a metal hand.

“I know for a fact I can smash your head using only one of these,” Bucky waves his metal fingers in front of Eddie’s face, “That’s the reason why I haven’t laid them on you, yet, cause you know… I’m a good guy and stuff…but I’m willing to forget all about that and do it anyway if you take another step towards her,” Bucky threatens through his clenched teeth, “Am I clear?”

“Y-yes,” Eddie stammers, widen eyes on the metal hand.

“Now you go and sit on that pretty couch… which I know quite well, by the way,” a wicked smirk curls his lips, before the deadly glare shifts Bucky’s face again “And you wait there until we leave.”

When Bucky lets go of Eddie’s shoulder, the guy rushes to the sofa and stays there. Completely quiet and still, avoiding Bucky’s unyielding stare on him.

Minutes after, Bucky catches your packed bags for you and you walk away hand in hand without looking back. 

~~~

As he takes quick steps to his place, Bucky can’t believe he’s finally going to see you again. Ever since you two finally set things up, work has been a complete bitch. He’s been called to another emergency mission, from which he has returned this morning, but then has been stuck in a conference room ever since. Fucking Nick Fury…As for you, you also had to work on the reports of your mission with Thor, and not even by phone you two have been able to talk much.

To be honest, it’s been only a couple of days, but now that he knows you love him back, he can’t wait to have you in his arms… and in some other parts of his body that’s been aching for you, too.

Thank God for Tony Stark, who just couldn’t cope with you staying at a hotel and, in a matter of hours, there was an apartment in the Tower waiting for you. Now that he’s only a few floors away, he plans on taking a quick shower and running straight to you.

His pace halts once he’s at his door. He frowns. Something’s out of place. Positioning his flesh hand over the gun on his thigh holster, he slowly turns down the knob of his door.

“Please, don’t shoot me.”

The sweetest of sounds, the sound of your voice makes him let out a relieved sigh right before a smile crosses his lips. He moves his hand away from his gun to open the door fully. The sight he catches when he does, takes his breath away all over again.

The lights are dim, only scented candles illuminate the place while rose petals pave the way from the door. There’s a small round table right there in the adjacent dining room, set with fine dishes and glasses and decorated with a crystal vase and fresh flowers.

Beautiful.

But not as beautiful as you. Standing there in his living room, wearing a short lace black dress with thin shoulder straps and a V-neck that makes his mouth water. You won’t be wearing that much longer, that much he knows as his pants become tighter.

He doesn’t realize for how long he’s been staring at you, until you move your gaze away for a second, biting your lips and scratching the back of your ear, “Hi,” you whisper and Bucky can see your shoulders getting a bit tense, “Welcome to our first date.” You give him a cringing smile and lift your arms, gesturing for him to see around the place, “Hope it’s not too much, though… I did spend a few hours fixing this up, Alpine was a doll and has been here keeping me company until she got bored and went to take a nap, I guess. I did not have time to cook but Tony offered his personal chef services and all we need is to call-”

After a few long steps he shuts your sweet nervous rambling by pressing his lips on yours. He pours all his love into the gesture and hopes he can erase whatever vestige of doubt and insecurity in that pretty mind of yours.

“I was dying to see you, sweetheart,” he says, breathing hard, just as you do, when he parts away, keeping both his hands on your cheeks, while you circle your arms around his waist. “This is… “ He looks around, “Incredible… You… shit… you look fucking sexy.” He groans, giving your body a once over, which makes you chuckle, “I’m only sorry you beat me to plan our first date. I should be the one to make all of this for you,” he says, tenderly brushing his thumbs on your cheeks.

You smile at him and tilt your head to place a kiss on his hand while one of yours starts drifting down his chest, “I’m still in debt with Little Bucky, aren’t I?” You wink at him while your wandering hand cups his cock through his pants, making him suck in a harsh breath, “And from now on I’m going to romance the shit out of you.” Your smile turns into a mischievous smirk.

“Shit,” Bucky breathes. Smiling, he leans over and captures your lips again. Not so gentle this time, since your cheeky words and your touch only makes the fire in him burn even hotter.

His hand drops from your face to your waist and he pulls you to him before he adventures down your ass, grabbing a handful of it through your dress, which makes you whimper through the kiss.

God, he loves the little sounds you produce when he touches you like that and he’s determined to coax a bit more out of you when he dips his hand under the hem of your dress and grabs your ass without the fabric’s barrier. But he’s the one to make a strangle sound to find out you’re wearing nothing underneath it.

“Fuck.” He parts from your lips only to ravish your neck, “Can the food wait a little, sweetheart?”

“Fuck yeah… please.” You pant, still brushing your hand on his aching cock.

He drags his lips to yours again, making the kiss deep and sloppy, savoring the feel of your tongue on his, the sweet taste of your mouth. You hike up your thigh around his waist, and his hand moves from your ass to between your legs. You moan through his lips and he groans to find you wet and ready for him.

His naughty, naughty girl.

“Honey…” He breaks the kiss but keeps his finger drawing little circles on your lips, watching closely while your swollen lips part and your eyes flutter. “I promise I’m gonna take my time and properly savor you throughout this whole night, but right now?” He pants and shoves a finger inside your damp cunt, “I just can’t take any longer, I need to have you. I want you so badly, do you want me, too?” He coos, curling his fingers on the point that always makes you yelp, gaining the aimed reaction from it.

“Fuck…” You curl your arms around his neck and lean over to whisper on his ear, “Always, baby. Always… I want you to rail me.” You grind your hips on his hand, like you’re desperately trying to get off solely from that.

“Dear God, I fucking love you.” Bucky bites the crook of your neck, but removes his finger from your pussy to grab your ass again. When he makes you come for the first time that night is going to be with his cock deep inside you, not his finger.

Breathing hard, you lean back and drop your leg. You quickly start working on his uniform. Not long after, you let out a frustrated groan. “Who the hell makes those?” You frown, fumbling with the complicated stripes.

“No time to deal with that right now,” Bucky states, and with ease, he handles you, ruthlessly, just like the way he knows you love, until he has you seated on the big and fluffy armrest of his couch.

He twists your legs to the side over the cushions, “Let me see that pretty pussy,” Bucky pants, voice thick with desire, lifting your dress just enough to give him the view and the access, “Shit…” he curses under his breath when he catches an eye of your glistening folds.

While he keeps himself on his feet, he works on his belt and zipper with one hand and holds your hips with the other. He absolutely loves the way you’re looking up at him, with that gaze of yours of sheer anticipation, lust and satisfaction he always saw in your eyes, but now, there’s something more. Something else… love. Hell, if that doesn’t make him even harder for you.

“You make me so fucking hard, sweetheart,” Bucky pulls his aching cock away from his confines and without waiting another second, he bends his knees a bit to align with your position and enters you.

“Holy shit,” you both gasp in unison.

At the comforting feeling of your warm and tight cunt - fucking finally - Bucky just holds back and, encouraged by the sweet begs coming from your lips, he supports one of his knees on the cushions, holds your hips still and starts fucking you. Right there, over the armrest of his couch, you both fully clothed, but desperate for each other.

You feel so damn good around his cock, and so damn beautiful with your cheek sunk deep on the sofa, your hands holding yourself on where you can, eyes closed and lips parted, sweet and filthy sounds coming out of you.

Bucky feels his core tighter and tighter and he knows he’s not gonna last long. He’s been waiting for this for so long, so desperately. He loves you so much. He wants you so much.

He tells you that, while he shoves his cock relentlessly inside you and leans down, not resisting to pull one stripe of your dress to expose one of your breasts to him. You cry out when he grabs the soft flesh. His hand moving in the same rhythm of his hips. Hard and deep.

“Holy fuck, baby, I’m gonna come,” you announce and, as soon as you open your eyes and your gaze meets his, your cunt squeezes his cock and you cry out. Not moving your hooded eyes away from his while you soak his cock with your climax.

Bucky is done for. If there had been any doubt of how much he’s a sucker for you, now it would be completely vanished. But, in fact, there hasn’t been any doubt about that in him for a really long time.

Having held himself back for a while now, the look on your face and you calling him “baby” are enough to make his pace become erratic and drive him to his own release. He moans and pants through the explosion of ecstasy, shoving his hips a few more times in you and filling you up with spurs of his pleasure.

You’re still fighting to breathe when Bucky leans over and crashes his mouth on yours, giving you a bruising kiss before sliding out of you and dropping his body on the couch next to you, not without pulling you with him.

He places you on his laps and you straddle his hips. You hold him, sinking your head on his neck, breathing him in. Your body shakes with the aftershocks of the pleasure you have just shared. The best orgasm he’s ever given you, the first one after you acknowledged and shared your feelings. Feels different… better… How you missed this… missed him…

“Enjoying our first date so far?” You ask, the sound of your voice coming out raspy and still breathless.

“Couldn’t be better,” he speaks, his hot breath fanning the skin of your neck.

You hold him even tighter and then giggle when you feel the wet touch of his tongue right there on the sweet spot between your shoulder and neck. You turn with the intention to kiss him and that’s when you realize he’s still in his mission uniform and you feel the fabric of your dress clinging to your skin, sticky with sweat.

You smile at him and brush your lips on his before getting up and, pulling him by the hand, you guide him to his bathroom.

This time he helps you with the strips of his gear and takes off your dress, before you two step into the shower. Nothing sexual happens, but that shared shower it’s one of the most intimate moments of your life. You leather him and he washes your hair. You play splashing water on him, and he kisses you. You hold him and he tells you he loves you.

After the shower you should’ve come back to the dining room and ordered your food, but he takes you to his bed instead. 

You get between his legs and suck his cock, slowly, reverently, peppering sweet and small kisses all over it until you swallow his pleasure. He kisses and licks and bites every little inch of you, savoring you like he promised he would. He makes you come with his tongue right before he enters you again. Forehead to forehead, breath to breath, skin to skin.

“I love you” is whispered repeatedly between harsh breaths and long and deep thrusts. His hands and lips on your skin. Your teeth on his. With his cock in your cunt and his finger on your clit he begs to see you come, to squeeze and soak his cock and, after you do, completely out of breath, he reaches his climax, too. Like he always does, he finds pleasure by giving you yours.

Your man. Your love. Your Bucky.

He stays beside you while he kisses you, neither of you willing to break the connection, yet.

When he looks down on you, there’s something of mischief on his loving gaze and on the beautiful smile on his lips, “So…Little Y/N missed me, too, huh?”

Your eyes widen for a second and you choke on your laugh, “No.” You shake your head while he laughs, “Don’t even start. Absolutely not… But goddammit, you’re cute,” you pull him to give him a smooch on his lips and then on his nose, “Now...” you say, while he keeps the adoring gaze down on you, “I love you so much. But can we move forward with our first date and eat something?” You cringe, “I’m starving and it’s all your fault. And Little Bucky’s.” You quickly add.

His head falls back and his nose scrunches in that adorable way of his while he laughs, “Alright, let’s go… but first,” he stops you with his lips on yours when you excitedly try to get up.

The kiss is long and soft and everything you’ve ever dreamed of. The hell with food, you’re pretty sure everything you need is right there, on top of you, kissing you and loving you like that, making your heart flutter and turning your legs into jelly.

You almost whine when he breaks the kiss and rests his forehead on yours, “You know,” he whispers, “I found out that it’s not just my buddy down there who has a strict preference,” he smiles cheekily, and you can’t help but smile, too, before he puts on some playful and exaggerated drama on his voice, “Turns out, my poor old fragile heart has it, too, and I’m gonna need you to take good care of it.” He brings your hand over his chest, “Do we have a deal?”

Your smile grows even bigger, filled with love, before you give him your answer.

“Always.”

THE END.

~~~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There it is, guys, this was my attempt at writing some light and fun rom-com. I really hope some of you have enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. It feels like I say this every time I finish a story, but I had so much fun writing it, this might be my favorite story so far. It’s definitely my favorite Bucky and I can’t part from him. That’s why I have a few oneshots planned so we can get a glimpse of their sexy adventures throughout their relationship, things that might’ve taken place during their deal, but also after what we’ve seen here in the main story. 
> 
> I can’t thank you enough for the incredible support I’ve received for this story, I feel so fortunate for having such amazing readers, who I consider as a very important part of my life. I tried to engage and interact with most of you, sorry if I ended up missing a few responses. I do read and reread the comments and asks often, though. You make my days brighter. Thank you. Love you.


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